Primary 6 student tries to jump off school building

[dramamama70]

Wow, what a shocker. But from speaking to my friends and family members who teach, suicide seems to be happening in our schools, just not reported widely.


My son is sitting for PSLE and my eldest is sitting for O levels this year and I can feel the pressure the kids are going through. We try to give them as much time to relax as possible but unfortunately there is no running away from homework and tuition.

My son especially, comes home with at least 3 worksheets everyday and each worksheet has about 30 MCQs and 10 open-ended questions. And these have to be handed in the next day. I see him go through the papers (with help from my husband or his tutor) and I feel so sorry for him.

And my daughter is forever buried in books that she only emerges for meals and toilet breaks. She told the the \"scholars\" in her school are really smart and she wouldn't even dream of competing with them. And btw, these scholars are from our neighbouring countries and their studies are fully funded by our government.

Sigh. All for the sake of good grades

[verykiasu2010]

it is one thing to stress on grades and good schools…but of equal emphasis must be to tell the kids as long they have done their best (not the parents’ best), it will be okay and not loved less.


don’t expect the kids to reach the sky if he / she can’t.

parents ought to be realistic with their expectation based on the kids’ ability

and please don’t compare between siblings. they can rival among themselves but parents must set the tone and the overriding consideration is doing one’s best and be honest about it, esp in the same household with kids of different ability in different schools

[schweppes]

verykiasu2010:

it is one thing to stress on grades and good schools......but of equal emphasis must be to tell the kids as long they have done their best (not the parents' best), it will be okay and not loved less.don't expect the kids to reach the sky if he / she can't.


parents ought to be realistic with their expectation based on the kids' ability

and please don't compare between siblings. they can rival among themselves but parents must set the tone and the overriding consideration is doing one's best and be honest about it, esp in the same household with kids of different ability in different schools

:goodpost:

Fully agree with you vk2010. I came across this phrase once and I find it so meaningful.

\"Too often, parents worry about what our children will become tomorrow, and yet we forget that they are someone special today.

It's very sad to read about what that boy tried to do. It shows that students today are under so much stress and pressure from school, peers and parents.

[jtoh]

This is really sad. Whether the boy fully intended to throw himself off the building, or if he was doing it out of mischief, it’s still a cry for help. And the parents, teachers and friends have to keep a close eye on him.


There have been too many cases of schoolkids committing suicide. Many are not even reported in the papers. Sad.

[dramamama70]

verykiasu2010:

it is one thing to stress on grades and good schools......but of equal emphasis must be to tell the kids as long they have done their best (not the parents' best), it will be okay and not loved less.


don't expect the kids to reach the sky if he / she can't.

parents ought to be realistic with their expectation based on the kids' ability

and please don't compare between siblings. they can rival among themselves but parents must set the tone and the overriding consideration is doing one's best and be honest about it, esp in the same household with kids of different ability in different schools

Totally agree with you! I know some parents put emphasis on results (my husband is guilty of this) but I put emphasis on EFFORT. Once the kids have put in their best effort, whatever results they get is what we'll have to accept. I only wish our school system would recognise that too.

[Chenonceau]

This is my son's opinion about why children commit suicide...


http://petunialee.blogspot.com/2011/02/more-on-useless-textbooks.html

[dramamama70]

Chenonceau:

This is my son's opinion about why children commit suicide...


http://petunialee.blogspot.com/2011/02/more-on-useless-textbooks.html

I don't know whether to cry or to laugh at what your dear son said. There is innocent truth and wisdom in what he said (and at such a young age) but it is all so sad too

[Fuzz]

schweppes:

verykiasu2010:

it is one thing to stress on grades and good schools......but of equal emphasis must be to tell the kids as long they have done their best (not the parents' best), it will be okay and not loved less.don't expect the kids to reach the sky if he / she can't.

:goodpost:

Fully agree with you vk2010. I came across this phrase once and I find it so meaningful.

\"Too often, parents worry about what our children will become tomorrow, and yet we forget that they are someone special today.

It's very sad to read about what that boy tried to do. It shows that students today are under so much stress and pressure from school, peers and parents.

Totally agree with both of you. I think it's very sad when kids are so stressed about their grades and exams that they don't have time to just enjoy their childhood.

There's no doubt that our education system is top-quality and efficient, and our standards are among the highest in the world. But at what cost?

As parents, we want the best for our kids so we often push them. But we must also remind ourselves not to get so caught up in this rat race that we rob our kids of their childhood.

It's our responsibility to ensure that our kids grow up with a balanced and healthy outlook. Yes we need to encourage them to work hard and do their best, and some amount of competitiveness is always good. But we must never forget to appreciate them for who they are and to remember that every child has different gifts and different interests.

My hubby and I always tell ourselves that we must never kill our child's passion for learning. But it's easier said than done, I know...

[verykiasu2010]

I always remember a story I read some time ago.


A father would now and then take the boy to playground but only for a little while because he wanted to boy to work hard and not play too much

Kids being kids and you know, when you are at the playground with the kids, it is hard to pull them away.....

One day, as usual the father hurried his boy to go home.....and his boy pleaded with him...\"Dad, 5 more minutes \" but the Dad soon got angry and so the son obliged to go home quickly while he went to a nearby store to get some grocery...

After the father reached home with his grocery, he did not see his son at home, thinking his son was still at the playground. So with an angry mood he went back to the playground to look for his son but he was not there.

Not far away a crowd was gathering. It was a traffic accident. The father thought nothing about it and went home, angry. Later, the police came knocking at his door .......

His son took a short cut trying to get home earlier to please his dad but was knocked down by a speeding car .... the crowd he saw gathered at the road was it ...... by then it is too late, if only he agreed to give his son that \"5 more minutes\" .......that \"5 more minutes\" became a lifelong regret

Parents, sometimes that \"5 more minutes\" really meant a lot more than 5 more marks in the exams

[Chenonceau]

verykiasu2010:

I always remember a story I read some time ago.


A father would now and then take the boy to playground but only for a little while because he wanted to boy to work hard and not play too much

Kids being kids and you know, when you are at the playground with the kids, it is hard to pull them away.....

One day, as usual the father hurried his boy to go home.....and his boy pleaded with him...\"Dad, 5 more minutes \" but the Dad soon got angry and so the son obliged to go home quickly while he went to a nearby store to get some grocery...

After the father reached home with his grocery, he did not see his son at home, thinking his son was still at the playground. So with an angry mood he went back to the playground to look for his son but he was not there.

Not far away a crowd was gathering. It was a traffic accident. The father thought nothing about it and went home, angry. Later, the police came knocking at his door .......

His son took a short cut trying to get home earlier to please his dad but was knocked down by a speeding car .... the crowd he saw gathered at the road was it ...... by then it is too late, if only he agreed to give his son that \"5 more minutes\" .......that \"5 more minutes\" became a lifelong regret

Parents, sometimes that \"5 more minutes\" really meant a lot more than 5 more marks in the exams

This story made me cry.

Yes... it's always good for parents to LISTEN to the urgency in a child's voice or his fear or his disappointment and give in. We always think we wanna mould our children and we know what is best. Sometimes, we know too little to be effective... because we don't LISTEN and HEAR the unsaid.

Children all want their parents' approval... and sometimes it is touching to see the lengths to which mine go to make me happy. Ohhhh... this is so so sad.