How to tell if a child is gifted?

[ponyo]

Hi Corrochan,


I couldn't have said it better! Glad to see that there are so many likeminded parents out here in this forum.

I remember being asked by a friend a year ago about the type of classes that DD attends. I replied that she has her ballet, childcare from Mon- Fri, swimming, sunday school in church and art ('cos it was held on Sats at the block next to where I am staying so I usually use that as a good childminding facility while I do my weekend marketing at the wet market nearby). btw, Her art class has since stopped 'cos the operator couldn't agree with the landlord.

Her reply then,\"you mean that's all?\" irked me to no end. :stupid:

What's wrong? Must every kid be sent to some brain-altering class to prepare them to be future president scholars/oxbridge scholars? Can't a kid just enjoy her /his childhood with just physical activities with the occasional drama classes?

I have had friends who were products of the GEP scheme and their careers turned out normal. Nothing spectacular too.

Let every child blossom in his/her own way. Most importantly, good character will get you further than whatever academic accolades can get you. So what if you have a head full of knowledge but a heart that is stone-cold (cannot empathise, etc)??

ok... enough of ranting

:x

[csc]

[quote]I avoid schools/playgroup/kindergarten/childcare with names containing these 'key words':

- brain
- university, campus
- Einstein
- anything that sounds like raffles or stamford
- IQ.... [/quote]Cheers! That's my style too.Not forgetting minds, gifted, champs - anything that promises to make a child gifted or changed to a better learner after attending a 3-day course is out! :lol:

[tony]

Totally agree, Corochan! :celebrate:


I also avoid schools that promise rote work upon rote work. I really DO NOT AGREE that the best way to learn is to practice formulas rather than understanding underlying principles.

The best way to learn is through discovery and making mistakes, not by perfect application of formulas.

[daisyt]

Gald to see so many parents here have the same mindset as me. I always insist a good learning attitute is the most important factor in learning route. To me, as long as she is average or above average, I am fine. What bothers me more is to develope her an active learning attitute.


Want to share a part of this mass email I received recently.

Assume A =1, B = 2 and so on as follow
A = 1
B = 2
C = 3
D = 4
E = 5
F = 6
G = 7
H = 8
I = 9
J = 10
K = 11
L = 12
M = 13
N = 14
O = 15
P = 16
Q = 17
R = 18
S = 19
T = 20
U = 21
V = 22
W = 23
X = 24
Y = 25
Z = 26

KNOWLEDGE = 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%
HARDWORK = 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%
ATTITUDE = 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%

[tony]

So true, Daisyt. Maybe we should start a thread on how to cultivate a positive learning attitude in our kids. I t-r-y very hard to celebrate the process of hard work and positive attitude rather than the outcome. I have found that when I am angst with them, they actually become more upset with themselves. But when I let go and focus on the effort, we all have fun and have a great time. That’s when we really enjoy learning (me included).

[daisyt]

hi tony, sure, its a good idea, to start a thread on how to cultive a positve and active learning attitute in our kids. You want to start one and start your sharing ? How old are your kids ?

[mintcc]

tony:

So true, Daisyt. Maybe we should start a thread on how to cultivate a positive learning attitude in our kids. I t-r-y very hard to celebrate the process of hard work and positive attitude rather than the outcome. I have found that when I am angst with them, they actually become more upset with themselves. But when I let go and focus on the effort, we all have fun and have a great time. That's when we really enjoy learning (me included).

great idea, Tony I have started the thread over here
http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?p=55436#55436

will love to hear from you over there.

[tony]

Tks Mincy. See ya on the other side.

[Jona]

Tamarind,


Kudos! to ur view! Yes sending kids to help them learn to "get along" with all which ensures future success!

My son is also in the same situation. He knows all the answers atleast the most and he is bored. He says the answer but does’nt want to write long long sentences. He can write neatly but feels bored. He is mildly hyperactive. Anyways I am doing my best on the behavioural theraphy.

But when it comes to friends he loves them he socialises. He has no attitude problem. He loves all one and the same. He supports and shares all with his friends.

But a bit out of self-control when he is excited. For example when one of his friend is naughty he tends to follow it or add to it.

His teacher spoke to my DH so long and said that my DS is her best partner. He does so much help for her and everyone. And that only when he is excited he tends to be naughty. He said he has come a long positive way when compared to what he was. (THAT is what they learn in school). And we as parents teach them how to have self control, respect, love, compassion and that sharing is fun, learning together is fun to bring harmony to teacher and school, irrespective of the race and culture. I always tell him if friends do good follow them, if they do bad don’t follow them. And that is called as self-control. Diversity in Adversity.

It is quiet challenging to bring up kids nowadays. They are intelligent. And They need to learn social skills to be more successful in life. For which we as parents first have to be role models. Children follow parents or photocopy parents becoz that is easy. So it is good that we set as examples. Becoz they tend to imitate us. Dont teach them too much. Becoz ultimately they dont have anything to learn. Leave interesting things which we think that they can pick up from teacher to kids. Otherwise we may in long run spoon feed them and they make not be able to analyse themselves and make their own decisions.

Nowadays I have learnt the word "MODESTY" is the best policy. Don’t always do everything. They also have to learn certain (non-risky) things by themselves. Just support them in the process of thinking and learning, and foster independent learning skills.

Don’t always resist negativity. What we resist will persist. Let them do certain non-risky negative things that does’nt harm others. Like my son will rocket fly in his scooter and fall down and get hurt, and come to me crying. Then after he falls down, I give a lecture (!) to him. Trying to get the point, when ur speed is modest, ur scooter is in ur control. When ur speed is too high the scooter is in speeds control. Which one do u want? U want to control ur scooter rite? Then better from next time be in modest speed.

But at the end of the day my throat is burnt , but worth doing that. I realize after his teacher gave positive comments on him. All the pains in my throat have gone.

Be patient with kids. They don’t do it wantedly. They do not know how to react and act to situations. It is us as parents to guide them at every stage of life.

I have been doing research on hyperactivity and nutrition. And really nutrition does wonders to intelligent and hyperactive kids, and for all kids. And behavioral therapy is very important to all the kids. We used to say a proverb "if we cant bend in 5, then we cant bend in 50".

So, it is good to instill values in kids before 5 years, the borderline. Becoz if they learn it before 5 years old, kids think that is the NORM and they just do it. After that we can, but it takes more pain and strain too much, and kids keep on asking questions, we got to justify why we are asking them to act so, which is pain in the neck.

But trying to be a role model by doing the right thing for kids to follow, we also change ourselves and become more mature adults.

Take care. All the Best.

[tamarind]

Jona,

Totally agree with your views.

Children with the gift of high learning ability are already very fortunate compared to other kids. They must be able to tolerate more \"hardships\" like \"boredom\" and \"not able to find friends of the same intellectual capability\", I don't think we should feel sorry for them.

I read from another forum : a boy pounced on his mommy, caused her to hit her head against something and she had to be admitted to A&E and ICU !!!

Later she brought him to the psychologist and was told that he was gifted and more advanced than other kids of his age. So when he did not get acknowledged or comprehended, he gets frustrated. The psychologist said that it is normal, and that he will grow out of it.

I think that the psychologist is wrong. If gifted children misbehaved, they should be punished even more severely than normal kids. If they grow up without the correct moral values, they will do a lot of damage to society.

I do not believe in caning as a form of punishment. I use other methods which I think are more effective.