If you could, would you decide on a 3rd child?

[penglee]

hi, can I humbly ask parents who have teenagers (secondary) to start another topic, and educate those with young-kiddos about what is Coming up !!


It will definitely be eye opener for me..thanks in advance.
For the next few years, let me enjoy the company of my toddlers first

:celebrate:

[3Boys]

[quote]
Those who fail are not weak, those who give up even without trying are weak. U know what i'm trying to say? It's the attitude of weakness i'm against, not against failure.[/quote]Why is it wrong to be weak? People are gifted with different levels of abilities, so some will be 'stronger' and some will be 'weaker'. Maybe not the preferable place to be, but nothing wrong in being weaker.

[winth]

3boys:

[quote]

Those who fail are not weak, those who give up even without trying are weak. U know what i'm trying to say? It's the attitude of weakness i'm against, not against failure.

Why is it wrong to be weak? People are gifted with different levels of abilities, so some will be 'stronger' and some will be 'weaker'. Maybe not the preferable place to be, but nothing wrong in being weaker.[/quote]Think you've quoted the wrong person. Can unquote me?

[Funz]

insider:

My recent entry in 'Depression' under the 'Health' thread again reflects the importance of having siblings. The sms I sent to my niece last night told her that her 5 uncles and aunties are always available for any help to her family. As I will be traveling soon, I gave her the mobile number of my other siblings for contact in times of urgent need. That's our full support to our dear sister. On my niece part, if her family really falls apart, she will her own siblings to count on for emotional support, instead of being alone...


Really sibling/s maybe one of the best lifetime gifts you can give to your child. Raising them may not be easy but actually it is not that tough if you can lower your expectations of material, academic, and whatever yardsticks you use to measure success...

Can't agree more about siblings. I have always wanted at least 3 kids, more if possible.

I always tell pple to have 2 or more kids if possible. Many of my frens talk about the stress. I will always ask them stressful for who, the kids or the parents. Personally, I think, with each kid that we have, it gets less stressful for the kids. Reason being the parents' hopes and expectations are not all loaded onto these 1 or 2 kids and the kids have more siblings to turn to in times of need. Simplistic views maybe. But that is how I see it.

[skunk]

3Boys:

Why is it wrong to be weak? People are gifted with different levels of abilities, so some will be 'stronger' and some will be 'weaker'. Maybe not the preferable place to be, but nothing wrong in being weaker.

I've never said it's wrong to be weak, I've only said I'm against weakness. Just like i'm against atheism, doesn't mean it's wrong. Ultimately, it's a personal choice. Yes, weakness is a choice, because we can choose to think positive and be strong.

Just like when i told my mom i'm aiming for 4 kids, if not 6, she said if i can do it, then i'm a more capable person than my dad, and she'll be proud of me.

Conversely, when my wife told her mother she's pregnant with a 2nd child just 4 months after the birth of our first, her mother's reaction is, \"how are u going to handle 2 small kids, 2 dogs and still work and take care of the household?\"

U see, exactly the same thing, told to 2 different ppl, will elicit such different responses LOL

My wife simply responded to her own mother, \"then how?!? U say like this is it because u want me to abort?\" Then her mother diam diam LOL

[winth]

funz:

Can't agree more about siblings. I have always wanted at least 3 kids, more if possible.

Actually I thought so too and would carry on to have my 3rd should my finances allow me to. I was also told that I would have 5 children if not for the modern birth-control technology. Well, that is until DS2 came along.

Boy, he's darn stubborn and a very difficult infant/toddler to bring up. And it took the :stupid: out of me that I have contemplated jumping down with him/throwing him against some wall. Those were the extremes, I was worried that I was sufferring from post-natal depression, so I quickly pick myself up and head straight back to work after 1 month, it was depressing to be on 24x7 standby for him. There was tremendous stress at work to keep up with my sales and still care for the 3 males at home when I'm back as a wife and mum. I was completely worn out by DS2 that I told my hubby 2 years back that we can forget about having the 3rd. DH shared my sentiments.

And DS1 is far too matured and is starting to show signs tat he is out-smart-ing us, from discussions and the way he handles things, you can actually forecast how difficult it will be to make sure he grows up well and proper. I was 'fortune' told (before DS2 came on board) that DS1 is super-smart and multi-talented. And now, I'm told that DS2 is smarter than DS1. I'm very happy and yet very sad. And it also means that parenting is going to be ultra-challenging.

Now, things are better (well, things can only get better) as DS2 grows up and we are still contemplating on the third, though we would really love to. But as the saying goes 养（而）不教，父之过. I wanna make sure we have the capacity of a parent to transfer principles and knowledge into them instead of just pure birth-giving. I'm not some 母猪 who gives birth and just leave them there to survive, and jump down and die if they grow into bad eggs.

Though, I would like them to have more siblings, it is really less stressful for them, but for us as parents, we are wondering if this should do more good or harm.

[3Boys]

Wow, a lot of hand-wringing and introspection.....


For me, to have no.1 and 2 was a no brainer. Thought about no. 3 for a while, and whilst we were thinking, he decided to make up our minds for us and 9 months later, voila :lol:

No. 3 is the fun-nest baby in the world, now 18 months, we can not contemplate not ever having had him. The 3 brothers really love each other's company sooo much, I don't remember ever being so tight with my siblings, but these 3, they're having a whale of a time.

[daisyt]

penglee:

hi, can I humbly ask parents who have teenagers (secondary) to start another topic, and educate those with young-kiddos about what is Coming up !!


It will definitely be eye opener for me..thanks in advance.
For the next few years, let me enjoy the company of my toddlers first

:celebrate:

penglee, there are a few topics in the Sec school section about teenagers issues. Not only school work, we talk about puberty, schedule of work. I cannot remember off hand but there are a few topics there. I am one who has a 13yo teenage.

[daisyt]

winth:

And DS1 is far too matured and is starting to show signs tat he is out-smart-ing us, from discussions and the way he handles things, you can actually forecast how difficult it will be to make sure he grows up well and proper.

hi winth, these are the signs storm is coming soon. hahaha ... How old is your DS1 ?

I was thinking to myself, 11 to 12 yos = storm. 13 to 15 = typhoons. 15 to 18 = tsunami. 18 and above, hopefully its a calm and nice beach ... :lol: :lol:

[winth]

3boys:

For me, to have no.1 and 2 was a no brainer.

:lol: same here, thot after having our good-natured #1, #2 would be as easy, didn't know he turned out to be the god-sent hell-maker for parents. Deep down and only on times that he wants to be good, he can be really sweet, not to mention vey popular with females.

3boys:

Wow, a lot of hand-wringing and introspection.....

Maybe we were too self-critical :oops:

daisyt:

hi winth, these are the signs storm is coming soon. hahaha ... How old is your DS1 ?

I was thinking to myself, 11 to 12 yos = storm. 13 to 15 = typhoons. 15 to 18 = tsunami. 18 and above, hopefully its a calm and nice beach ... :lol: :lol:

DS1 just turned 6, going P1 next year. My tenant told me to teach him thoughts and values as if he were an 8 or 9 year old. Don't teach him baby-ish things anymore.

You're scaring me leh... #3 was just talked about yesterday again.