Advice - Divorce or Not to Divorce

[Baby39]

I only transfer out the amounts that he intended to tranfer out in the first place without telling me. I could have withdrawn all but I don’t want to be the one in the "理 kui" position. He found out. Woke me out 4 in the morning and hurl verbal abuses and vulgar languages, demanding that I put back into the joint account. The irony is he denied access to car, to TV, to internet, trsf $ without my knowledge (for whatever gd intention he claimed later) during cold war, he still think he IS the victim and added anger with me for not showing care with him when he worked late and was sick (is that reasonable behaviour to expect when someone is in cold war?)


How do I get someone like him to realise and acknowledge that he has a problem? How to not build up more resentment btw both parties - marriage counselling to me will only work if both parties are open to it.

I was in fear earlier - not knowing what else he would do next and then I calmed down, what worst could it possibly get?

Thanks for "listening" to my rantings. I need somewhere to release.

[Baby39]

I am trembling now as i write this. Itz a stalemate at home now with his family members by his side in the same house against me outside room to guard me fm going near my kid n refusing to tell me whatz the next step. What am i going to do now? I will not go anywhere without my kid.

[sall]

Baby39:

I am trembling now as i write this. Itz a stalemate at home now with his family members by his side in the same house against me outside room to guard me fm going near my kid n refusing to tell me whatz the next step. What am i going to do now? I will not go anywhere without my kid.

Do u mean they're confining you to the room and keeping your kid away from you? You should call someone for help. How old is your kid? If nobody can help, call the police. Take care and good luck.

[Chenonceau]

sall:

Baby39:

I am trembling now as i write this. Itz a stalemate at home now with his family members by his side in the same house against me outside room to guard me fm going near my kid n refusing to tell me whatz the next step. What am i going to do now? I will not go anywhere without my kid.

Do u mean they're confining you to the room and keeping your kid away from you? You should call someone for help. How old is your kid? If nobody can help, call the police. Take care and good luck.

What is your address? I will call the police for you. Or someone else will because I have to log off soon.

[Baby39]

Chenonceau, i cant thx u enuf 4 throwg the much needed helpline. I was so so desparate n loss. . It was a nitemare. I forced the talk to be just btw us, took a step back. All is calm now, we agree to seek marriage counselling. Praying it wld work but no matter what happens in the end, i wld be grateful to u just by the thot of offering help. It really means a lot. I realize one thg at the end of day after approachg aware, lawyer, itz all down to self help actually. First n foremost, sort out your thots ie whether ur marriage is worth salvaging WHEN u r calm. Helpline or lawyers or even court protection can only do that much.

[Baby39]

N sall to you too. Thxs much!

[Baby39]

N sall to you too. Thxs much!

[sall]

Baby39:

N sall to you too. Thxs much!

You're welcome. You sounded like you were in danger, I was worried for you. Hope there'll be some improvement in the future. All the best.

[Baby39]

I hope so for sake of kid. Never never take a kid away from the mother in argument, if they did it then, i will go crazy n i dunno what i wld hv done then. On hindsight, i wonder why i was still sane then … One verbally abusive hb shoutg at the top of his voice plus mil addg fuel only hearg his side of story plus them on phone callg 4 reinforcements n they refused to tell me what they want fill my heart w fear. Every table was turned. Ended up i was the stole money schemg bitch. The amazing thg is this era, there are still beliefs that as long as a guy does not womanise and gamble, the wife need to tolerate.

[sall]

Hi Baby39, maybe you should discuss with your husband about closing the joint account. Take back the amt you have contributed. Then one less headache in future. There are many cases of husbands who emptied the joint acc and then dumped the wives. You have to protect yourself.