One of the slowest kid in class...

[Seekinghelp]

Hi guys,

I'm new to this forum. My nephew has been giving me headaches...complaints from form teacher times and times again...saying he's slow in completing his work in class.
Yesterday, there was a Mock Math Exam, he din even complete a single ques of the pb sums in Section C which pissed me off. The Exam is ard the corner, with such speed, he's not going to complete the whole ques.
How should I guide him so that he can improve on his speed in completing his work? He's also lazy in doublechecking his ans.

[watmekiasu]

My dd is the same. Super slow in everything - from school work to meals and shower. A meal can take up to 2-3 hours, a shower 1 1/2 hrs etc. She seldom manages to finish her Math mock exam papers on time. However, she will rise to the occasion during exams. I know it is not a solution to your problem but I always make it a point to remind dd to not spend too much time on difficult questions. Circle and quickly move on to the next one. Complete the rest of the paper and return to the circled ones.

[atutor2001]

It is a habit developed from young because we thought that they were still small then. A very common bad habit that is very had to remove.


I think making homework into a game may help if he/she is not too notorious :

1. split the assignment into smaller parts (say by page)

2. set a ridiculously short time frame to let him bargain for more time and accept his offer.

3. bluff them by giving them more than the agreed time so that they will win (but must let them lose occasionally - more wins than loss)

4. Score will be given if they managed to complete within the time limit (don't focus on the correctness of the ans first)

5. reward with sweets, crackers ... (don't be too generous because they will bargain for more and more. must be agreed at the start of the game)

6. Observe his performance, don't push beyong his limit - otherwise he won't ever play again. Best to stop the game when he was still enthusastic by pretending that you won't free, promising to play again.

We can focus on the answer only after he has the patience to attempt the questions. Don't scold them for careless mistake.

It is all about patient - damn tough. This would not work if he is a very smart kid because he see through your trick - for this group, looks like the only answer is the cane. Only the person he fear most can handle him.

Good luck (just my 2 cents worth :oops: )

[tutormum]

Is it his nature to be slow? If it is, than you have to train him by giving him time limit in what he does e.g. unless he change in 5 mins or you'll leave the house without him. I've a niece who is very slow when she's young but she has improved over the years. I agree totally with atutor2001 except that I've one student who confided in me that she purposely go slow in her schoolwork so that her mum won't be giving her more work. It's true that her mum never give her time to do other things. All she gets were assignment after assignment. If this is the case, agree on the amount of work to be done before he starts and the prospect of having more time to play will encourage him to speed up. Some kids may be playful and the reason they are slow is they just refuse to do work. Giving incentives may work only for a while. These are the kids that give the real headaches. :x One solution is to show them that you know their tricks and won't be taken in. They'll find excuses and you have to counter them e.g. no toilet break for 1st hour (except for emergency) so they must go toilet before they start etc. You can get the teacher to make him stay back after class to finish his work. I find it usually works.

[Seekinghelp]

Ty all for yr advices. It's true that whenever he knows that I'm going to give him some more work, he can really take his own sweet time to complete his work. Especially, when no one is sitting besides him to supervise him, he really takes it for granted. A few pb sums, he can take hrs to complete it only after I woke up and get scolding from me.

He is extremely lazy too! Lazy to brush his teeth, bathe on his own, go toilet to pee, drink water etc...awaiting orders from us before he does all those things. It is damn tiring and piss off, everyday has to repeat the same old thing just to tell him what to do....my sis expects him to do well in his studies but on the other hand, ask me to let go of him. Thinking that he will do well in studies under no pressure. That's impossible! I do feel stress teaching her son. Talk to him nicely, he ignores u. Always loves to ask stupid ques in wrong timing and love to argue with u. Whenever I ask him to be more serious, he always up to mischief. I really duno how to discipline and communicate with her son. I'm not the patient type. I can be nice to him if he knows how to respect me but when he starts his nonsense, I really can't take it. :x
His form teacher does punish her students for not completing their work on time, ask them to complete it during recess time or P.E. But it seems like not working for my nephew. He can't be bother most of the time.....

[James Ang]

Seekinghelp:

Ty all for yr advices. It's true that whenever he knows that I'm going to give him some more work, he can really take his own sweet time to complete his work. Especially, when no one is sitting besides him to supervise him, he really takes it for granted. A few pb sums, he can take hrs to complete it only after I woke up and get scolding from me.

He is extremely lazy too! Lazy to brush his teeth, bathe on his own, go toilet to pee, drink water etc...awaiting orders from us before he does all those things. It is damn tiring and piss off, everyday has to repeat the same old thing just to tell him what to do....my sis expects him to do well in his studies but on the other hand, ask me to let go of him. Thinking that he will do well in studies under no pressure. That's impossible! I do feel stress teaching her son. Talk to him nicely, he ignores u. Always loves to ask stupid ques in wrong timing and love to argue with u. Whenever I ask him to be more serious, he always up to mischief. I really duno how to discipline and communicate with her son. I'm not the patient type. I can be nice to him if he knows how to respect me but when he starts his nonsense, I really can't take it. :x
His form teacher does punish her students for not completing their work on time, ask them to complete it during recess time or P.E. But it seems like not working for my nephew. He can't be bother most of the time.....

It is very difficult to teach your own relative and family member. My own experience as a child back then is that I detested my own aunt to teach me because firstly I don't have faith that she knows/understands my work, also she cannot give an objective amount and level of work, and she is too familiar to me that I fear she can tell my parents that I am \"stupid\" or \"lazy\", and she teaches me when \"she is free\" not when I need help or according to schedule. She is better to remain my aunt, not my teacher. Rather my school teacher and tuition teacher commanded my respect then as a student because I had faith in them.

[qms]

watmekiasu:

A meal can take up to 2-3 hours, a shower 1 1/2 hrs etc.

:!: :!: :!: :faint:

[jedamum]

are you the caregiver of your nephew? how is your relationship with him?

usually parents or relatives with closer relationship with the student can motivate the kid to work towards a certain goal. he is simply not motivated as it does not affect him if he can’t please you as you are afterall, only an aunt.

[concern2]

Agree with jedamum. Maybe by behaving the way he does, he is hiding some true feelings. Maybe he is a softie at heart! Need some "man-to-man" bonding perhaps, a role model of some sort. Or perhaps he has some interests in art/music/sports, something non-academic to channel his energy?


I know of a tuition teacher who spends part of her tuition hour telling stories and getting her students to think. It is her way of understanding her students and bonding with them.

[Guan Hui]

Be angry but please do not give up on him.=D