One of the slowest kid in class...

[concern2]

Seekinghelp, just my opinion, maybe since he likes art, instead of getting him to go straight into homework, can get him to draw you something. Whether it is nice or not, just appreciate it. Talk about what he draws, it is a way to reach out to him. Even if it is a scribble, try guessing what he is drawing, talk, talk, talk. communicate. let him open his heart to you, and later gently bring his attention back to the task at hand (homework). The bonding will help him relax and concentrate in his work. But all these takes time, and you need lots and lots and lots of patience with him. That's what I have to remind myself with my own son.

[concern2]

Seekinghelp, your situation brings to mind a video I watched recently about a music teacher who gradually took on the role of a mother (for a short time) and inspired a child to become one of the greatest musician.


The name of the movie is For Horowitz, a korean show based on a true story of Horowitz (musician).

Watch this movie trailer on youtube.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilx36vWPtZ4&feature=related

[Seekinghelp]

Very grateful to u guys for giving me such wonderful advices, appreciate that. It's an excellent forum for pple to communicate and get info from one another....

[mrswongtuition]

atutor2001:

Now that they are much older and I am no longer able to help them in their study, I tried my best to stay awake to accompany them when they were struggling with their studies through the night.

This is exactly what my dad did.

I always complained that my brother & sister are very noisy in the day, I can't study. So I'll nap in the day. Then I'll have dinner & start studying when my siblings are in bed. I study till 3-4am, then back to sleep. & when I need to wake up for school in the morning, my dad will ask me to sleep later & he'll wake up early with me to fetch me to school. Everyday, without fail, my dad will send me to school. He only started to go on business trips (he rejected any business tt required him to travel) when I got my driving license & could drive myself to school.

I did not request for anyone to stay up and accompany me, neither did I demand for my dad to send me to school.
I like the peace & quiet of studying at night, alone in my room. I also like the 'daydream time' I get while travelling.

But my dad will ALWAYS, without fail, sits in the living room with the television on, but NO SOUND because he knows that I would get irritated by any sound.

I could tell my dad was very tired after work but he still made the effort to stay up with me. He'll make ice milo for me (my fave drink) & bring ice water for me (I don't drink plain water). Sometimes he sees me rummaging through the kitchen cabinets for food, he'll go out to buy supper back for me. & he always buys porridge cos he says it's easier on the stomach to eat porridge at such late hours.

He did not have to say much, but his actions were priceless. Though I always scold him (for his foolishness) & nag at him, he nvr scolds me & always supports me (even when I'm in the wrong - no scoldings at all but he'll show tt he is disappointed in his facial expression).

It's the silent support I've been getting that made our relationship very close. I can tell my dad all sorts of crap. I can even bitch to him about my unhappiness at work or with my hb. He'll just listen, smile & pat my back. No comments, no judging, no silly remarks.

My mum's just as supportive, but in a different way. She nags & scolds, but she also jokes & play. She's the problem solver in the family while my dad is the silent supporter. Whatever we need, just ask my mum & she'll always be there to solve it for us (even small minute things like helping me pay my bills cos I got no time to go AXS machine, my mum will gladly do it for me & sometimes she don't want us to pay her back). [u]

You can choose to be your child's friend, but at the end of the day, it's more important for you to be your child's #1 supporter
They may not show it, but they'll definitely appreciate it Maybe not now, but they'll definitely keep it in their hearts for the rest of their lives.[/u]

[Guan Hui]

seekinghelp


You may want to send him to those motivational workshop like adam khoo’s " I am gifted so are you" program

Do not misunderstand I do not work for adam khoo=D

[Seekinghelp]

Hi Mrs Wong, u are so blessed to have such a gd parents. If all the parents could be like yr parents, that would be great. Even though my nephew is the only son of my sis but I do feel that they dun love him that much. Sometimes I'm wondering, y in the first place still want to give birth to him, let him suffer in this world.....I must admit I'm not a gd auntie too, coz I will hit him too if he shows disrespect to me or din pay attention to what I said.


His parents would never send him to that workshop, Guan hui....

[atutor2001]

Guan Hui:

seekinghelp


You may want to send him to those motivational workshop like adam khoo's \" I am gifted so are you\" program

Do not misunderstand I do not work for adam khoo=D

Please don't. That is all I want to say and please don't ask why. I will not answer.

[marvic]

Seekinghelp:

Hi Mrs Wong, u are so blessed to have such a gd parents. If all the parents could be like yr parents, that would be great. Even though my nephew is the only son of my sis but I do feel that they dun love him that much. Sometimes I'm wondering, y in the first place still want to give birth to him, let him suffer in this world.....I must admit I'm not a gd auntie too, coz I will hit him too if he shows disrespect to me or din pay attention to what I said.


His parents would never send him to that workshop, Guan hui....

\"Even though my nephew is the only son of my sis but I do feel that they dun love him that much. Sometimes I'm wondering, y in the first place still want to give birth to him, let him suffer in this world\"....hi seeking help, maybe that is the root of the problem. this child could be yearning for love and attention...

[tutormum]

I think I understand your nephew’s problem after reading your various posts. It takes all types of parents to make up this world. I have a sis in law who has the same problem. She’s not the type to like bringing up children so she only has a son and left him with her mother in law in another country. This boy was only brought back when he had to start school. His granny spoilt him as she thought that he was neglected. His parents thought that he was ill-disciplined and secretly blamed his granny. The parents were harsh on him in order to rein him in. The boy became very rebellious and didn’t do well in school. I feel sad cos I didn’t have the opportunity to help him. The parent - child relationship is so strained that parents and child are living their own lives after this boy has grown up.

I have another student whose parents also neglected her and was left alone with her maid all the time. She did badly in school until when I started to tutor her in P2. Besides tutoring her, I spent time talking and teaching her as if she was my own daughter. She always look forward to my tuition cos that was the only time she had someone to look up to and confide in. Not only her grades improved remarkably, she’s a very well adjusted girl and is popular among her friends. Her family and relatives are impressed that though she grew up in a disadvantaged environment (can’t tell you whole story) she’s now a confident and diligent child.

[Seekinghelp]

My nephew is also a stubborn person, always thinks he is right. Still doesn’t know how to cherish the things he has, taking things for granted. And he always loves to argue with u. How to make him listen to u without talking back at u?