Child adoption

[carebear]

mum03:

Has I could see that people adopt for different reason. Has mentioned the couple who adopted the little boy, as shown more love to him then to their own biological child. He is so happy and contented. They treat him like their own.


I have no reservation of adopting a child with open arms. If I could give someone who are deprived of love and a home, it could be a blessing. Loving the child should be unconditional,should not accept any gains from it ( they will look after me when I grow old), not even sure whether our own children will look after us.
I have always thought of this option in my life, where I could give a child a home and love.

A close friend of mine adopted a child. They do not have a child of their own, after many years of marriage. Ever since this child came into their life, they have become a complete family. I have seen so much of love been showered on her. She is now school going age. She is one of the top student in her school. The adoptive parents give her and send her to all the enrichment classes she need, not forgetting the holidays she take to far away country. The child does not know that they are her adoptive parents. No outsider will know unless, it is been told.
They want her to have a complete family. Their say the child has brought life into them, they will try to give her everything, and accept nothing in return. They are such a closely knitted family, that it brings tears to me.
It takes alot of courage and openess, to love someone other then your own flesh and blood.

What if they later have a child or children of their own?

[mum03]

carebear:

mum03:

Has I could see that people adopt for different reason. Has mentioned the couple who adopted the little boy, as shown more love to him then to their own biological child. He is so happy and contented. They treat him like their own.


I have no reservation of adopting a child with open arms. If I could give someone who are deprived of love and a home, it could be a blessing. Loving the child should be unconditional,should not accept any gains from it ( they will look after me when I grow old), not even sure whether our own children will look after us.
I have always thought of this option in my life, where I could give a child a home and love.

A close friend of mine adopted a child. They do not have a child of their own, after many years of marriage. Ever since this child came into their life, they have become a complete family. I have seen so much of love been showered on her. She is now school going age. She is one of the top student in her school. The adoptive parents give her and send her to all the enrichment classes she need, not forgetting the holidays she take to far away country. The child does not know that they are her adoptive parents. No outsider will know unless, it is been told.
They want her to have a complete family. Their say the child has brought life into them, they will try to give her everything, and accept nothing in return. They are such a closely knitted family, that it brings tears to me.
It takes alot of courage and openess, to love someone other then your own flesh and blood.

What if they later have a child or children of their own?

I have ever ask them about it,and they say that \"God gave us unconditional love\" so if we could and least give a little bit to someone who are deprived of love the world would be a better place to live. They even are talking now to adopt another child from cambodia. I wish them well.

[GreenQ]

cmm:

,,,As the baby grew older, they soon realised that he's from a different race (possibly malay) from his skin color, which was not so obvious when he was a newborn, though they were assured that the baby was chinese at the point of adoption...

Oh... similar story here. I thought adoption party hardly make mistake on different race of baby? :roll:

I know of one couple who has adopted a baby girl. This couple is my good friend's brother & sis-in-law. A very beautiful baby with big eyes. She has darker skin when she was a baby. As she grows older, it is very obvious that she is a malay girl! She has curly hair too. However they were assured that the baby was from a chinese lady at the point of adoption. (May be the father of this baby is a malay guy? :idea:)

This couple felt quite sad. But luckily they love this adopted child very much and treat her as their own. This adopted child is 10 years old now. I think she can tell by herself she is an adopted child. Very obvious.

[mum03]

GreenQ:

cmm:

,,,As the baby grew older, they soon realised that he's from a different race (possibly malay) from his skin color, which was not so obvious when he was a newborn, though they were assured that the baby was chinese at the point of adoption...

Oh... similar story here. I thought adoption party hardly make mistake on different race of baby? :roll:

I know of one couple who has adopted a baby girl. This couple is my good friend's brother & sis-in-law. A very beautiful baby with big eyes. She has darker skin when she was a baby. When she grows up, it is very obvious that she is a malay girl! She has curly hair too. However they were assured that the baby was from a chinese lady at the point of adoption. (May be the father of this baby is a malay guy? :idea:)

This couple felt quite sad. But luckily they love this adopted child very much and treat her as their own. This adopted child is 10 years old now. I think she can tell by herself she is an adopted child. Very obvious.

This goes to say, that regardless of race or religion, you could still love another being. It does not matter where they come from, but how they are brought up and love.

[en107rn.01056yahoo.01056com.01056sg]

I dont have experience of adopting a child but my niece is adopted. My sister after her first miscarriage is not able to conceive as her womb is weak.


My niece is not aware she is adopted. When she was about 3 years old, my sister brought my niece to see her elder sisters and little brother in the neighbouring country. Her natural mother just died of motor cycle accident pregnant with her 5th child. Her natural father lost among the addicts, not sure if he is dead or alive.

My sister and her hubby loves their daughter very much. Both my kids adore their cousin and my children are not told of their cousin history either. My father dots on this beautiful child. My mum loves her too but I could sense some reservation and biasness towards her own flesh and blood.
[quote]This goes to say, that regardless of race or religion, you could still love another being. It does not matter where they come from, but how they are brought up and love.[/quote]I just need to add, irregardless of parental background too, adopted children deserved the best brought up and loving environment.

[carebear]

EN:

I dont have experience of adopting a child but my niece is adopted. My sister after her first miscarriage is not able to conceive as her womb is weak.


My niece is not aware she is adopted. When she was about 3 years old, my sister brought my niece to see her elder sisters and little brother in the neighbouring country. Her natural mother just died of motor cycle accident pregnant with her 5th child. Her natural father lost among the addicts, not sure if he is dead or alive.

My sister and her hubby loves their daughter very much. Both my kids adore their cousin and my children are not told of their cousin history either. My father dots on this beautiful child. My mum loves her too but I could sense some reservation and biasness towards her own flesh and blood.

My niece who is 2 years old is also adopted as her adopted mother developed some womb problems after giving birth to her son.
The younger generation ie my kid's generation is not aware that she is adopted as requested by her adoptive parents.

Regarding grandmother's biasness toward her grandchildren, in my case i feel that my mother in law prefers her daughter's son than my son and daughter. Weird isn't it? Own grandson bearing her family name don't want to look after, even at that time i told her just watch over the maid.
Instead she gave up her full time job to look after her daughter's son.

In retrospect, i am glad i have tide through those times without her help, and have grown to be independent. I was lucky to have a responsible and dependable maid at that time who was like a nanny.

[mum03]

EN:

I dont have experience of adopting a child but my niece is adopted. My sister after her first miscarriage is not able to conceive as her womb is weak.


My niece is not aware she is adopted. When she was about 3 years old, my sister brought my niece to see her elder sisters and little brother in the neighbouring country. Her natural mother just died of motor cycle accident pregnant with her 5th child. Her natural father lost among the addicts, not sure if he is dead or alive.

My sister and her hubby loves their daughter very much. Both my kids adore their cousin and my children are not told of their cousin history either. My father dots on this beautiful child. My mum loves her too but I could sense some reservation and biasness towards her own flesh and blood.

Sense of reservation, always comes from the grandparents, I have seen it. They always favour their own flesh & blood, why can't they show the same affection to another being. My mother does that, she adores my neice with gift, and love. When my cousin comes by with her adoptive child, she does not even touch her, saying not sure where the child comes from. It really hurt my feeling, thus I always show more affection to my cousin's child then to my own sister's daughter. My mum was not happy about it. My standing is the adoptive child needs more support/love then our own.

[en107rn.01056yahoo.01056com.01056sg]

My father gave more attention and love to my sister’s daughter. He said, my kids have all the things in the world and my niece should have more too. I don’t mind such remarks. Knowing my father, he indulges all his grandchildren but more to my niece earlier on as my sister was a sahm. My mother doesn’t show her reservation but told me that she does not feel close to my niece. I reason with my mum that the reason she feels closer to my kids are because, she look after mine and not my niece. Looking after my children will remind her of my naughtiness but for my niece, there’s no similarities to my sister. I understood how my mum feels. They just came back from a short vacation. I hope the short vacation will make my mum feel closer to her other grandchild.

[mum03]

EN:

My father gave more attention and love to my sister's daughter. He said, my kids have all the things in the world and my niece should have more too. I don't mind such remarks. Knowing my father, he indulges all his grandchildren but more to my niece earlier on as my sister was a sahm. My mother doesn't show her reservation but told me that she does not feel close to my niece. I reason with my mum that the reason she feels closer to my kids are because, she look after mine and not my niece. Looking after my children will remind her of my naughtiness but for my niece, there's no similarities to my sister. I understood how my mum feels. They just came back from a short vacation. I hope the short vacation will make my mum feel closer to her other grandchild.

Do you think that after staying with the adoptive family from birth, doesn't the child takes up the mannerism of the adoptive families. I saw my cousin's child speaks and act exactly like my cousin. Its weird, but I think after eating/sleeping and always being with her does have effect with the child in their growing up. Its funny :lol:

[Cinta]

hi, anyone noe how long will be the adoption process n how much is d legal fees…txs