2012 PSLE Discussions and Strategy

[Sun_2010]

slmkhoo:

But just a little note of caution - such pampering, if much more than usual, conversely adds to the stress as the child feel he needs to work harder or perform better to 'pay back'. I remember as a child asking my parents NOT to promise me rewards for good results because it stressed me even more.

True. My DD was this kind of child.
For the conscientious kid, it becomes a burden. \"Everyone is taking so much care, i better not let them down\" feeling.

Often we had to down play things ...

[janet88]

This pampering is to motivate him to continue working hard. This McDonald sundae thing is dessert once every 2 weeks actually. He enjoys the drive-thru. Explained to him that orals are just next week, so have to hold back cold stuff.


Keep him happy with simple pleasures. If I see him putting in effort, that’s most important. Come July and August, it will be more demanding.

[Chenonceau]

janet_lee88:

This pampering is to motivate him to continue working hard. This McDonald sundae thing is dessert once every 2 weeks actually. He enjoys the drive-thru. Explained to him that orals are just next week, so have to hold back cold stuff.


Keep him happy with simple pleasures. If I see him putting in effort, that's most important. Come July and August, it will be more demanding.

I think it's alright. You aren't using it as a reward. It's just done in the course of living and breathing. Little happy events do keep morale up. I stock up on youtiao... or make mushroom risotto... or spaghetti bolognaise just to make DS happy too. It has nothing to do with how well he does. Happy things in the course of every day is what makes this PSLE still something of a LIFE.

Enjoy the little things in life, especially if it's a Sundae on a Sunday. Shouldn't stop smelling the flowers just 'cos the train is coming eh?

[mum42]

Chenonceau:

janet_lee88:

This pampering is to motivate him to continue working hard. This McDonald sundae thing is dessert once every 2 weeks actually. He enjoys the drive-thru. Explained to him that orals are just next week, so have to hold back cold stuff.


Keep him happy with simple pleasures. If I see him putting in effort, that's most important. Come July and August, it will be more demanding.

I think it's alright. You aren't using it as a reward. It's just done in the course of living and breathing. Little happy events do keep morale up. I stock up on youtiao... or make mushroom risotto... or spaghetti bolognaise just to make DS happy too. It has nothing to do with how well he does. Happy things in the course of every day is what makes this PSLE still something of a LIFE.

Enjoy the little things in life, especially if it's a Sundae on a Sunday. Shouldn't stop smelling the flowers just 'cos the train is coming eh?

Agreed totally! The time taken for all these little pleasures are also giving the children and also parents time to breath n time off from all the works .

[janet88]

Chenonceau:

janet_lee88:

This pampering is to motivate him to continue working hard. This McDonald sundae thing is dessert once every 2 weeks actually. He enjoys the drive-thru. Explained to him that orals are just next week, so have to hold back cold stuff.


Keep him happy with simple pleasures. If I see him putting in effort, that's most important. Come July and August, it will be more demanding.

I think it's alright. You aren't using it as a reward. It's just done in the course of living and breathing. Little happy events do keep morale up. I stock up on youtiao... or make mushroom risotto... or spaghetti bolognaise just to make DS happy too. It has nothing to do with how well he does. Happy things in the course of every day is what makes this PSLE still something of a LIFE.

Enjoy the little things in life, especially if it's a Sundae on a Sunday. Shouldn't stop smelling the flowers just 'cos the train is coming eh?

You're so sweet. As mummies, we just have to do what we think we can. Little pleasures go a long way. PSLE may be tough, but there should be something memorable about it.

[beanbear]

Yes I totally agree with this idea about doing little things to perk up & cheer up our stressed out children. We should continue doing the little things beyond PSLE year too, otherwise our kids will think we only take special care of them during PSLE & not other times.


I tried out taking DS to the club to do revision on Sunday. We would do a few math sums, then he took 5mins break to play one arcade game, then came back to another few sums. We shared an apple pie & tea together. A heartwarming moment that I treasure. I asked DS if he enjoyed the revision session and he nodded. Right after revision, he jumped into the pool straight away and we ended the day with a family game of table soccer. After that wonderful Sunday, I’ve decided to do more of such sessions.

This year is certainly more stressful than other years in Primary School and this could also be the year we create more meaningful rather than painful memories with our children. Many times, I felt more stupid not being able to do Primary 6 work, and it’s such a great contrast to how successful I feel in my corporate work. It’s humbling for me to learn P6 work alongside with DS. He sees I struggle to learn and when he wants to give up finding solutions to sums he can’t do or to avoid doing things that he’s not excelling, I find it’s my role to show him it’s ok to struggle, Mummy also don’t know many of these P6 stuff and I’m an adult!! What’s important is we must persevere to find the answers and to know why we don’t know.

There were also moments when I feel so "sian" about learning P6 work that I find myself wanting to walk away. These are moments when I realize I need to have a life besides living the PSLE life. I decided I’ll do stuff that engages me the adult too, read other things besides PSLE guide books, watch a movie, get a massage, etc. Parents really need to take of themselves so that our children who see us taking care of ourselves will in turn learn to take care of themselves and learn to relax.

Some children may look like they are not panicking or have a sense of urgency about studying or revision. It may just be they feel alot and prefer to avoid feeling stressed and they mask it by looking "cool" or "bo-chap" or "unmotivated". If they’ve had a series of failures and not been performing well, it’s easy to feel demoralized and talk themselves into being bo-chap. These are the kids who really need parents to give them experiences of success at home because the official exams at school will set them up for failure and we know that strategy is damaging. Hence we need to create a reality at home where our kids experience success, joy & encouragement.

[fightingmom]

beanbear:

Yes I totally agree with this idea about doing little things to perk up & cheer up our stressed out children. We should continue doing the little things beyond PSLE year too, otherwise our kids will think we only take special care of them during PSLE & not other times.


I tried out taking DS to the club to do revision on Sunday. We would do a few math sums, then he took 5mins break to play one arcade game, then came back to another few sums. We shared an apple pie & tea together. A heartwarming moment that I treasure. I asked DS if he enjoyed the revision session and he nodded. Right after revision, he jumped into the pool straight away and we ended the day with a family game of table soccer. After that wonderful Sunday, I've decided to do more of such sessions.

This year is certainly more stressful than other years in Primary School and this could also be the year we create more meaningful rather than painful memories with our children. Many times, I felt more stupid not being able to do Primary 6 work, and it's such a great contrast to how successful I feel in my corporate work. It's humbling for me to learn P6 work alongside with DS. He sees I struggle to learn and when he wants to give up finding solutions to sums he can't do or to avoid doing things that he's not excelling, I find it's my role to show him it's ok to struggle, Mummy also don't know many of these P6 stuff and I'm an adult!! What's important is we must persevere to find the answers and to know why we don't know.

There were also moments when I feel so \"sian\" about learning P6 work that I find myself wanting to walk away. These are moments when I realize I need to have a life besides living the PSLE life. I decided I'll do stuff that engages me the adult too, read other things besides PSLE guide books, watch a movie, get a massage, etc. Parents really need to take of themselves so that our children who see us taking care of ourselves will in turn learn to take care of themselves and learn to relax.

Some children may look like they are not panicking or have a sense of urgency about studying or revision. It may just be they feel alot and prefer to avoid feeling stressed and they mask it by looking \"cool\" or \"bo-chap\" or \"unmotivated\". If they've had a series of failures and not been performing well, it's easy to feel demoralized and talk themselves into being bo-chap. These are the kids who really need parents to give them experiences of success at home because the official exams at school will set them up for failure and we know that strategy is damaging. Hence we need to create a reality at home where our kids experience success, joy & encouragement.

:goodpost:

Yes, everyday i am learning alongside with my DD too...

Let's continue to :rahrah: :rahrah: them !

Fighting !

[janet88]

PSLE is so tough now…is the objective of MOE to allow bonding with kids ?

This year is madness for both kids and parents. Will it get better when they go to Sec 1?

[fightingmom]

janet_lee88:

PSLE is so tough now...is the objective of MOE to allow bonding with kids ?

This year is madness for both kids and parents. Will it get better when they go to Sec 1?

I have friends with kids in secondary schools .. no tuition and their kids seems to have a whale of time especially the first few months in Sec 1.

[fightingmom]

janet_lee88:

PSLE is so tough now...

This year is madness for both kids and parents.

Keep going, Janet ! :nunchuk: :stompfeet:

:hugs: