In-law problems?
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janet_lee88:
My standard is not too bad..at least I am not a hoarder. If I have Indian chief here, she will tell the whole world what I dumped.
So you have an Indian Chief with a loud hailer? Hmm or do Indian Chief use big fire/blanket and lotsa smoke signal.. need to tell the whole world will involve probably burning down the whole forest! :rotflmao: :rotflmao: -
fifiyeo:
Can ignore or dont do? I mean... unless its their house, why should they go and decide for other pple what to do or change? Even if they mean well, the most they can 'suggest'.. but i think giving instructions or worse, butting their heads in and literally going to change my home is really crossing the line. Anything should at least ask me (the owner) first and if i am agreeable then okie, i will do it if the suggestions make sense. If not i dont need to justify why i dont want to change things.I certainly wouldnt go to my ILs' place and pick on what they have cos its their rights. If things need changing cos old/broken, we will still get their agreement first before helping them buy. I think that's respecting people's rights and it should go both ways.
At least some of your ILs when they are picky, they do the \"upgrading of system\" for you. Mine will stand there and be \"Indian Chief\" giving instructions, point here and there, and you do it.
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aurorin:
Smile sincerely is difficult... :hi5: But smile got different types.
Smile and ignore is abit tough for me. Ignore easy.. smile harder.. :rotflmao:
A polite and distracted smile with a slight nod... and a hint of mystery, can communicate a very loud \"No!\" (especially if you back it up with the exact opposite action she suggested)... And since you only smiled and nodded without SAYING anything, this gives her no chance to take offence or to mis-interpret your words.
Usually, when I start smiling, she stops talking. It took a few years to achieve this though... -
aurorin:
I clam up when I have to go to her place. Lesser said, lesser harm done.janet_lee88:
My standard is not too bad..at least I am not a hoarder. If I have Indian chief here, she will tell the whole world what I dumped.
So you have an Indian Chief with a loud hailer? Hmm or do Indian Chief use big fire/blanket and lotsa smoke signal.. need to tell the whole world will involve probably burning down the whole forest! :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
See nothing, hear nothing. -
Chenonceau:
Ultimate POWER you have!
Smile sincerely is difficult... :hi5: But smile got different types.aurorin:
Smile and ignore is abit tough for me. Ignore easy.. smile harder.. :rotflmao:
A polite and distracted smile with a slight nod... and a hint of mystery, can communicate a very loud \"No!\" (especially if you back it up with the exact opposite action she suggested)... And since you only smiled and nodded without SAYING anything, this gives her no chance to take offence or to mis-interpret your words.
Usually, when I start smiling, she stops talking. It took a few years to achieve this though...
How I wish I can do that PLUS \"greet\" and ignore. -
Chenonceau:
POWER! :udawoman:
Smile sincerely is difficult... :hi5: But smile got different types.aurorin:
Smile and ignore is abit tough for me. Ignore easy.. smile harder.. :rotflmao:
A polite and distracted smile with a slight nod... and a hint of mystery, can communicate a very loud \"No!\" (especially if you back it up with the exact opposite action she suggested)... And since you only smiled and nodded without SAYING anything, this gives her no chance to take offence or to mis-interpret your words.
Usually, when I start smiling, she stops talking. It took a few years to achieve this though...
I think if i try, later turn out like some villian.. hiakhiakhiak.. like Dr Evil or something.. :rotflmao: Or maybe i can smirk.. i am quite good at smirking... hiakhiakhiak okie. got to go practise at the mirror.. Smile with a hint of mystery! I like! -
aurorin:
Got disadvantage though... My DD uses the same trick on me when she disagrees with what I am saying, and has no intention to do what I suggest.
POWER! :udawoman:
I think if i try, later turn out like some villian.. hiakhiakhiak.. like Dr Evil or something.. :rotflmao: Or maybe i can smirk.. i am quite good at smirking... hiakhiakhiak okie. got to go practise at the mirror.. Smile with a hint of mystery! I like!
But I don't mind. I prefer the mysterious smile \"No.\" to a violent yelled \"No!\" and a big scene.
It's saying \"No\" nicely to me lor... because I have good intentions and my kids know it. And I do recognise that at 18, DD is her own woman and should be respected as such. So when I see that smile, I know to back off, smile back and say \"Whatever you decide, I know it will be a good decision for us all.\"
And that's that. Family harmony is intact. No poison. Much love. -
:mad: Indian cheif stand there and wait for you to do. Can don't do? Can, if you want to start a fight. Otherwise just get it done and at least can close case and move on with life
Once Indian chief came over and ask me to open all the windows said it was hot. After 5 mins, ask to close all the windows because hot must turn on aircon. In the first place I wanted to turn on the aircon but was not allowed to.
Then ask to watch TV. Say don't know how to turn it on! So must be served.
Then ask to fetch something so she can pack something that belongs to her. Next thing I know after fetching those items she wanted, I was asked to pack them up for her. Say don't know how to do.
End of everything go back and tell everyone came over to help me out. What you all think? :stupid: :mad:
All this while I was trying to fix lunch and have to run in and out of kitchen to serve the chief! -
This morning, DH + myself + MIL went for breakfast.
DH ordered 2 cups of coffee, one for MIL & one for both of us to share (as we usually do).
Coffee come, MIL plonk her cup in front of DH.....told DH not to share with me, drink hers. Then DH tried to diplomatically tell her I dun drink so much (MIL always have one big cup in the morning) so he'll drink from mine. After a while, MIL face machiam charcoal when she saw him drinking from my cup. No choice, he had to drink some from hers ..... jealously?
Sometimes, she tries to stop him from going out with me too....dinner, buy groceries, breakfast etc etc. :siao:
MIL also tries to change my furniture settings, where I place my stuff (esp. kitchen - so much so that we have 2 sets of stuff like onion, garlic, soy sauce etc in the same kitchen). :slapshead: -
BeContented:
Coffee come, MIL plonk her cup in front of DH.....told DH not to share with me, drink hers.
Sometimes, she tries to stop him from going out with me too....dinner, buy groceries, breakfast etc etc. :siao:
hard that she is not thinking of getting into bed with the 2 of you.
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