is this considered mental problem?can it be cured at IMH?
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cool_hi... that sounds exactly like my colleague's MIL! :yikes:
I hear exactly the same complaints... Are you my collleague lol... -
shinri:
Could he be referring to his mom or wife?? :scratchhead:cool_hi... that sounds exactly like my colleague's MIL! :yikes:
I hear exactly the same complaints... Are you my collleague lol... -
hi
Your mum's condition is rather similar to mine, well, maybe yours slightly worse. I can understand your predicaments, similarly, I also used to have my share of shouting arguments with her - btw I am also a hot-temper person.
Over the years, I have learnt the do's & don'ts in dealing with my mum to avoid unnecessary argument. Partly, also due to the wisdom of my wife who enlighten me to see my mum in another manner. Just want to share the following:
1) there bound to have some serious underlying mental issues - not address, in her younger days, which cause her to behave like that. For my mum, is the constant extreme bullying by her brothers and thereafter the in-laws over the years. If you can understand her underlying problem, hopefully, you can understand & sympatize with her.
2) If your mum is in her 60s - 70's forget about bringing her to psychitrist. As over time, her sub-conscious mind has molded her fear & insecurity into her current behaviour, and this has been deeply ingrained inside her. Trust me - my sibling tried psychiatrist on mum but to no avail. Just try to accept her as who she is will make you a calmer and happier person.
3) Try to understand what she likes best. For my mum, she likes money, probably at her age by having more money, will counter her insecurity and inferiority. So just try to give her whatever you can afford, anyway how many more years will she still be around.
Hope the above help.
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A mental problem could be a possibility, but like mel2sg has mentioned, best to just take it in your stride. Very often, such people with abrasive personalities and abnormal cognitions don’t realise it (lack "insight", as in the counselling term) and feel that people are against them instead.
Good luck though… it will be very difficult. -
Had a relative and friends’ family members who behave like this. Some of them behaves this way as far as the children can remember, but some were personality changes (not overnight). Ends up real cause is dementia - most have FTD - frontal temporal dementia which causes the patients to be verbally and in some cases physically abusive. Very difficult to diagnose coz it’s difficult to get them to see the geriatrics. However once they have the right medication, they stabilize and the agitation and aggressiveness are very greatly reduced and some totally non existence. The sickness is non reversal but some medicine can help to slow down the progress.
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Had a relative and friends’ family members who behave like this. Some of them behaves this way as far as the children can remember, but some were personality changes (not overnight). Ends up real cause is dementia - most have FTD - frontal temporal dementia which causes the patients to be verbally and in some cases physically abusive. Very difficult to diagnose coz it’s difficult to get them to see the geriatrics. However once they have the right medication, they stabilize and the agitation and aggressiveness are very greatly reduced and some totally non existence. The sickness is non reversal but some medicine can help to slow down the progress.
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To add: dementia like Alzheimer’s and FTD are no longer old age sickness and not confined to what people think just forgetfulness. More and more cases of early onset…60 is quite normal. Seen cases where patients are much much younger. Also right concoctions of medicine is important but takes a long time to get it right coz most medicines that curb the aggressiveness has other health hazards. Doctors normally starts on the safe dosage, but after some times, the doctors and family members will have to decide if it’s the quantity or quality of life that matters. It’s living hell for the patients and caregivers when the patients illness are not diagnosed or proper medicines are not administered.
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Sorry, posted same message twice. How to delete?
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Maybe is just a sign of being too lonely in a house too quiet. Some people just needs attention.
Or in my case a house too noisy with the Taiwan series blasting. They find it interesting that people quarrel all the time.
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