HOW TO MOTIVATE MY GIRL TO PUT IN MORE EFFORT IN HER STUDIES

[spanly]

hello Chenonceau,


I'm keen in your book as I do sincerely believe the importance of the child to be self motivated if he/she want to do well in their study... but alas how many such children will be so automatic??

My 8 yrs old boy need quite a lot pushing to get his work done.. he always wanted to complete his tasks fast(which results in careless mistakes) so he can finished quickly & go play... DW is pretty frustrated in coaching him after work.. He got bad sitting habit too... giving him a good set of ergonomic table & chair & yet he didn't want to sit properly. Both of us have been telling him off but it doesn't seem to get into his head... he has also such care-less attitude.. :frustrated: I know some of these traits are not uncommon in kids this ages but nevertheless, is still so frustrating not to be able to rectify them.

Hope your book would address some of the above issues... thanks.

[Chenonceau]

DQ:

Dear Petunia, I've just ordered your book, paid via PayPal-credit card.

Really looking forward to reading your book and start motivating myself, and perhaps my dh, then together, motivate our three self-iphone/ipad/computer games-motivated kids :evil:

Thanks for ordering my book. I hope you will enjoy it. May this book help you shine love into your children's lives.

[Chenonceau]

spanly:

hello Chenonceau,


I'm keen in your book as I do sincerely believe the importance of the child to be self motivated if he/she want to do well in their study... but alas how many such children will be so automatic??

My 8 yrs old boy need quite a lot pushing to get his work done.. he always wanted to complete his tasks fast(which results in careless mistakes) so he can finished quickly & go play... DW is pretty frustrated in coaching him after work.. He got bad sitting habit too... giving him a good set of ergonomic table & chair & yet he didn't want to sit properly. Both of us have been telling him off but it doesn't seem to get into his head... he has also such care-less attitude.. :frustrated: I know some of these traits are not uncommon in kids this ages but nevertheless, is still so frustrating not to be able to rectify them.

Hope your book would address some of the above issues... thanks.

Hi Spanly,

Gee... thanks for your interest.

The 11 strategies documented do help parents achieve Internal Drive Ignition(TM) in children. Internal drive ignition was the topic of my PhD dissertation. (1) Telling Off and (2) Pushing... are not very effective motivation strategies. There are others more powerful and more loving. May the book help you shine love into your children's lives.

The book, however, does not deal with seating posture.

Best
Chen

[Chenonceau]

debbiehsl:

Hi Chen,


I would like to order too. Can you let me know how can i go about ordering it?


Thanks.
Deb

Many thanks Deb... I have received your order.

[debbiehsl]

Hi Chen,


Wonder if i can get assistance from your advise on certain issue privately about my boy if you dont mind calling my mobile.

Deb

[Chenonceau]

debbiehsl:

Hi Chen,


Wonder if i can get assistance from your advise on certain issue privately about my boy if you dont mind calling my mobile.

Deb

Hi Debbie,
I tend to get quite inundated with private requests for help via PM. Some forummers here can attest to the fact that a single phone call on a private issue can take up to 2 hours. I used to have more time and could do it and I did it for free. Now, I have less time. So... ever since I started my coaching/therapy services, I've been implementing the following.

I am happy to help for (in my spots of free time) if you don't mind sharing your issue publicly on this forum. This way, my response to you is shared with others and everyone learns. If you want a private consultation, you can read up on the options here...
(1) http://www.petunialee.blogspot.co.il/p/therapy.html
(2) http://www.petunialee.blogspot.co.il/p/coaching.html

My advice to you is to read the book first. I realize that until parents have read the book, I end up explaining some of the basic strategies already in the book. This takes up time... and if you pay for that sharing as part of Coaching/Therapy... it is very expensive. To save money, it makes more sense to read the book first.

Don't panic. Even if I call you now, I don't think it'll help much. Read the book first... don't panic... think about what you have read... some things will fall into place. I've seen that happen very often.

Very often parents come to me and are very burdened. Over time, I realized that many of these motivation problems that parents see as insurmountable, are very very solvable. You just need to know how. Calm down... don't panic... have faith that yours is a solvable problem. Read the book and try to solve it yourself first.

If you need coaching even after reading the book, then you can let me know. I will waste less time and you will waste less money in coaching IF you have already read the book.

[sean wife]

Hi Petunia,


The coaching session is for parents to motivate their kids right? So it is optional to bring the kid along right?

Thanks.

[Chenonceau]

sean wife:

Hi Petunia,


The coaching session is for parents to motivate their kids right? So it is optional to bring the kid along right?

Thanks.

Hi Sean Wife... we have you on record as having bought the book? Am I right? How is the book?

The coaching session involves only parents. Therapy sessions involve children. Therapy sessions cost more than coaching sessions. Typically, parents come for coaching. Therapy sessions are required ONLY IF, in order to learn, the parent requires hands-on demonstration effectuated by me upon their child. Most parents can manage with coaching alone. Unless there are very stubborn parent habits and important blind spots, I generally do not advise therapy.

[sean wife]

Chenonceau:

sean wife:

Hi Petunia,


The coaching session is for parents to motivate their kids right? So it is optional to bring the kid along right?

Thanks.

Hi Sean Wife... we have you on record as having bought the book? Am I right? How is the book?

The coaching session involves only parents. Therapy sessions involve children. Therapy sessions cost more than coaching sessions. Typically, parents come for coaching. Therapy sessions are required ONLY IF, in order to learn, the parent requires hands-on demonstration effectuated by me upon their child. Most parents can manage with coaching alone. Unless there are very stubborn parent habits and important blind spots, I generally do not advise therapy.

Yes yes...the book is indeed a very good read…the devil is in the implementation though, so thought of seeking some personal advice if really need to…btw what are your ‘consultation’ hours like on weekdays and weekends?

[Coolkidsrock2]

Hi Chen, agree with Sean Wife that the devil is in the implementation rather than learning it on a principle basis. Although I attend mentoring, teaching, motivating, self help classes as part of my corporate training and I also have a performance management pyschologist coaching me, I still feel that I cannot implement it as well as yourself or some of the parents here. I have seen vast improvements in kids and my #1 had shown in excess of 50 T-score points improvement from p5 year end to p6 prelim, I feel that she can achieve a lot more if she has parents who can groom her the way yourself or some others can do it. If you are planning a second book, it will be good if it is more prescriptive, ie contain more of how you do it. Also, will be good if you can extend the issues all the way to JC level. Kids grow up and they have grown up, the approach will be different so any help will be appreciated.