Tragic accident at Tampinese - pls wear cycling helmets!
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cool_hi:
I cannot agree with you more. Cyclists should also practice road etiquette. I have almost been knocked down by them on pedestrain pavements, they have suddenly appeared in the middle of small roads when traffic lights is not in their favour and some have even rode in the middle of the lane, causing slow traffic at peak hours.I agree with Dora1..prevention is better than cure..I do not trust my maid to send/walk/take bus to send my kids to school..coz saw so many cases of near-knock down cases of maids bring kids to school!
& I will never allow my kids to ride bicycle on the roads!
& to be fair to drivers,cyclists in S'pore Ned to be taught on proper cycling eg,they are supposed to walk across traffic light with the bicycle,NOT cycle across? Correct me if I am wrong..
My hubby almost knock down a teenager who cycled at high speed across a traffic light late night when lighting was bad..& traffics light was green for my hubby!!within 1-2 sec,the boy just cycled across at high speed!!i screamed then hubby shouted at me asking why?!then he saw the boy.,if hubby drove off at the moment light turn green for him,that will b another tragedy!! &. Nightmares for us!! So who is at fault?!
I used to pick my kids up when the school bus service is not available even though they wanted to take the public transport. Even though I can teach them road safety, when it is a situation of kids with kids, they may forget, especially boys. On their way to the bus-stop, they may engage in childish play such as \"I push you, you push me\". I had seen near accidents when picking up kids from school. -
concern2:
I shared with DS and DD about the news yesterday. After a moment of silence, DD replied,\"Mommy, I think you should have 10 children...\" :faint:[/quote]The govt will be very happy if you do.
:sad: mum asked why never leave behind one of her sons but have to take both away....MMM:
[quote=\"Kissgurami\"]http://www.straitstimes.com/the-big-story/tampines-accident/story/tampines-accident-family-friends-paint-picture-close-siblings-
[/i]
But all this is sooooo sad. My son asked if they( the brothers) had any other siblings ?
Makes me want to do something, feeling so helpless... dunno what to do
Maybe will go down to the junction and place some flowers this weekend.
God, give the parents the strength... -
This is what makes it worse, to me. It is not as if the parents were irresponsible, they were not. She usually picks the younger son up after school and on that day, she had gone earlier in the day to pick him up, but he wanted to stay back to try a new CCA so she was actually prepared to do 2 school runs for him. The elder son insisted on picking the brother up because the mother had to rush for the 6pm shift. There are so many what-ifs and I-should-haves that must be going through her mind all the time. By all accounts, she has tried her best to accomodate her child’s interests and it seems to me that she has raised a very responsible, considerate and good elder son. There is no other words but a cruel twist of fate…
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Sun_2010:
Feel exactly the same way.
But all this is sooooo sad. My son asked if they( the brothers) had any other siblings ?
Makes me want to do something, feeling so helpless... dunno what to do
Maybe will go down to the junction and place some flowers this weekend.
God, give the parents the strength... -
concern2:
I shared with DS and DD about the news yesterday. After a moment of silence, DD replied,\"Mommy, I think you should have 10 children...\" :faint:[/quote]My ds was like... but you still have the other 2 girls... But I told him they are all unique. We will be sad if we lose any one of them.
:sad: mum asked why never leave behind one of her sons but have to take both away....MMM:
[quote=\"Kissgurami\"]http://www.straitstimes.com/the-big-story/tampines-accident/story/tampines-accident-family-friends-paint-picture-close-siblings-
[/i]
Previously when I read news of parents losing their kid when the kids are in their late teens or 20's. I feel for them and also for the fact that they cannot have any more kids since they are in their 50's. For that reason, we will not do anything that affect our ability to reproduce eg. ligation, etc... -
ammonite:
This is what makes it worse, to me. It is not as if the parents were irresponsible, they were not. She usually picks the younger son up after school and on that day, she had gone earlier in the day to pick him up, but he wanted to stay back to try a new CCA so she was actually prepared to do 2 school runs for him. The elder son insisted on picking the brother up because the mother had to rush for the 6pm shift. There are so many what-ifs and I-should-haves that must be going through her mind all the time. By all accounts, she has tried her best to accomodate her child's interests and it seems to me that she has raised a very responsible, considerate and good elder son. There is no other words but a cruel twist of fate...
Yes, so sad, life is so so unpredictable.... The elder son so gwai, ....sigh... very very very sad. :sad: -
Coolkidsrock2:
Yup yup... in the last 6 months, we've quite a no. of cyclists shock who cycle too fast, don't stop at zebra crossing and suddenly dash across out of nowhere. Fortunately dh is a “slow” driver.. From our house, we need to turn from the small road to main road... Sometimes the cyclist would just cycle in front of the car when it's obvious that the driver is actively looking for opportunity to turn out.... It's really :mad: They should go behind the car to avoid an accident.I cannot agree with you more. Cyclists should also practice road etiquette. I have almost been knocked down by them on pedestrain pavements, they have suddenly appeared in the middle of small roads when traffic lights is not in their favour and some have even rode in the middle of the lane, causing slow traffic at peak hours.
I used to pick my kids up when the school bus service is not available even though they wanted to take the public transport. Even though I can teach them road safety, when it is a situation of kids with kids, they may forget, especially boys. On their way to the bus-stop, they may engage in childish play such as \"I push you, you push me\". I had seen near accidents when picking up kids from school.
I always feel that 不要 害人害己。Cyclists will be badly injured during accident. I am not siding driver. But in the event of an accident as a result of cyclist's \"take it for granted\" act, the driver though not physically injured will have to live to guilt the entire life and his family life will also be impacted if he has to go jail and has a family to feed... So i feel that every road users must play their part to be careful.
We’ve also seen really young kids (eg. K1/k2) crossing road by themselves. They are quite small and short and drivers might not be able to see them well (even if they raise their hands). It made me wonder why did the parents let them wander around on their own.
I kept warning the kids not to be engross with their phone when walking on the street (when they come back after school by themselves)…. At traffic junction, don’t stand right at the line. I always urge them to stand behind to avoid any cars that goes out of control or people behind accidentally pushing them and they end up on the road. We have also encountered pedestrian (usually teenagers or young adults) who blast out on their ear piece and totally oblivious to the traffic around…. -
ammonite:
This is what makes it worse, to me. It is not as if the parents were irresponsible, they were not. She usually picks the younger son up after school and on that day, she had gone earlier in the day to pick him up, but he wanted to stay back to try a new CCA so she was actually prepared to do 2 school runs for him. The elder son insisted on picking the brother up because the mother had to rush for the 6pm shift. There are so many what-ifs and I-should-haves that must be going through her mind all the time. By all accounts, she has tried her best to accomodate her child's interests and it seems to me that she has raised a very responsible, considerate and good elder son. There is no other words but a cruel twist of fate...
cannot agree more! -
concern2:
I just had to get it out, concern2.. as a fellow mom.. whether it is one child or more.. equally heartbreaking.. No parent can ever be prepared to bury their own children before themselves. No parent can imagine having to send off their child or children regardless how the children passed on. As parents we raise our children with all the love in our hearts and we must always remember that raising children is not for the sole reason of chasing paper qualifications. Ask yourself if you ended each and everyday reminding them how much you love them and for the siblings, how much they love each other... If you know your child was happy.. if your child had time to play.. if your child had time to be a kid.. if your child had laughed that day.. if your child knows he/she is loved.. no matter what tomorrow brings, there are no regrets.
Thanks for sharing your story, Buds. Couldn't stop my tears. There is nothing more important then our kids, and they are our lives. So true.buds:
....
...
\"Baby, it's me. Sorry, could you ring the music school to cancel today's lesson? We met up with an accident.\"
My head spun quite suddenly and I quickly sat down. My tummy ached from the news over the phone. I wanted to ask so many questions but didn't know which I should ask first. But hubs seemed to know what was on my mind. He immediately declared that both were safe but on the way to the hospital to get their injuries checked. \"The bike's a wreck.\" Hubs said. My heart sank. \"Is DD1 okay?\" I asked while I held my breath in. \"Yes.\" I heaved a long sigh. I rang my Daddie to ask if he finished work and that I needed him.
Once we met up I saw DD1, she was in a wheelchair... her face all dirty and her arms and legs were a little bloody. My heart cried out inside but I didn't show it. I hugged her and she kept saying, \"I was so scared, mom. I was so scared.\"
We all sat close to one another and listened as hubs related the ordeal that just happened. It happened so fast. In mere minutes but the details depicted every second of what they just went through. A slow-mo re-cap you may call it.
They were almost reaching the traffic light junction and he already dropped gear... the bike already slowly and gradually getting ready to halt nearing the line. Out from nowhere, a big lorry was nearing closer and closer to the side of the bike where their right calves were. Hubs moved further left to avoid a swipe but the lorry didn't seem to be slowing down at all. It kept moving into the left. DD1 started to scream and hubs turned around and shouted for the driver to stop but the driver didn't even notice. The lorry's windows were up. Hubs honked the horn together with a few other cars as well. Yes, drivers from other lanes paid attention. The driver still didn't slow down. As the lorry started to move in on them, DD1 screamed, \"Daddy!!!\" The next moment, hubs just let go of the motorbike sending it a few metres away in front of them as both he and DD1 flew to the side of the road. Everything went fade to black for a few seconds for hubs. Apparently, the lorry driver then abruptly jammed his brakes. Hubs quickly got up from the ground worried about our daughter. He hurried over to her. She seemed to have blacked out for awhile and it took some light nudges to rouse her. DD1 screamed again when her eyes opened. She said, \"It's painful daddy. Very painful.\" She sobbed loudly... shaken... and in pain.
A few drivers stopped behind the lorry to render help and everyone seemed to be silently praying that no one was seriously hurt. Hubs ignored the throbbing pain he had and gently instructed DD1 to move her limbs slowly to make sure nothing was broken or fractured. He prayed that the blood streaked on DD1 was superficial. All the other drivers offered to help with something. One moved the flung motorbike. Another carried DD1 to a safer side of the road. Another helped to direct the traffic.
Yes, the first instinct was to punch the lorry driver as he parked at the side and came out to see if hubs and DD1 were ok. It took every inch of hubs to hold everything in him especially after he shouted, \"What the **** were you doing? Can you even see where you are going?\" ..... and the response he received was, \"Err.. sorry.. sorry.. wo bu dong.. wo bu hui jiang Engrish.. err.. ni gen wo lao ban shuo.. sorry..\" Yes. It was a China driver. Hubs really really held it in him I tell you.. really did.. Not that he was xenophobic but majority of his experiences with the foreign talents had been quite bad. Yes. He was angry. Very very angry.
He was angrier when the boss translated over the phone that the driver was a little sleepy and was out delivering new furniture for his company for the new year. He pleaded with hubs to settle. No cops. He will foot everything. From medical, transportation claim, to any income loss due to any absence from work. He pleaded that he has a family with mouths to feed and that it was the new year. He won't scrimp and delay any payment. He gave hubs his company details and hubs kept the driver's ID till they officially met up. The driver too was pretty shook up and apologetic. He looked guilty looking at DD1 wailing at the side of the road. DD1 refused to even look his way.
After consultation, while waiting for treatment and prescription for minor injuries DD1 shared...
DD1 : Mom, I was so scared I couldn't speak. But when I calmed down, I remembered about the motorbike. I told daddy I was sorry that his motorbike was a wreck because of me, because he had to send me. He really just flung his bike. We were both like in the air for a short while. It was scary. But daddy said, don't worry about the bike.
His exact words were, \"Don't worry about the bike. As long as you're okay. The bike is not important.\"
I felt sad when he said that, mom.
Me : Why?
DD1 : I was rude and mean to him. I didn't even wanna practice playing the violin properly cos I didn't feel like it. But he said everything was not important as long as I was ok. Made me feel so guilty. Why did he say that?
Me : Because he's your dad. Parents always forgive their children. Even though they don't say it all the time.
I could feel tears glistening already by then..
DD1 : I told daddy, it must be expensive to fix and we don't have the money... and how was he going to go to work.. Again he said don't worry, it's not important. As long as I was ok. He said, motorbike is not a living thing but I was his life. Motorbike can repair or get another. Then, he asked me if he could buy another daughter from the shop. Silly daddy, of course cannot. But all this time I thought he was angry with me because I didn't listen.. I thought he didn't love me.
Me : All parents love their children, sweetie.. even though they don't show it all the time.
Back at home.. with packed food for dinner so I didn't have to fuss abt cooking and clearing, all of us ate a quiet meal that evening. As I cleared up the rubbish, I gestured hubs to put DD1 to bed. I advised him to give her some closure to put her at ease and also loosen her up from that mini scare.
I saw them in embrace and as he lightly touched her hair running through it gently putting it in place, I heard him tell her..
\"Nothing is ever more important than my children. That is why I work so hard, so we can at least try to live a comfortable life. Now with another baby coming along, I have to work doubly hard. I love all of you more than anything. I am sorry the accident frightened you. It was my fault. I should've been more careful. I shouldn't even have gotten you on the bike in the first place. I am sorry.\"
DD1 just nodded, her cheeks streaming with tears. Before hubs left the room, he kissed her forehead gently and whispered to her I love you and have a good rest.
The tragic crash in Tampines sparked a dejavu for me and my family. Hence this long post.
This new year, I encourage you to acknowledge your love for your family.. to forgive.. out with the old (bad history) and embrace the new.. well it is \"NEW\" Year ain't it? May all years of bad history be buried so that new history can be made.
I've shared this before. Life is short. Live life to its fullest.
Live like everyday is your last. http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/content/make-everyday-count
~ For the family of the two innocent boys from the tragedy, my heart, my thoughts and my prayers are with you... As you ache and pine for the loss of your sons, I am aching with you. I am praying with you. Your pain today only serves to remind me to love my family even more. ~
Cherish what we have now and not only when we have lost it. Stay safe everyone. Never take safety for granted whether you are a driver or a pedestrian.. Have a blessed new year celebration and bask in the bliss of being around your families.. for there are others who are without.
I chose to show my children the pictures for it is the best way to show how not to take life for granted.. not to take kinship for granted. The girls sometimes quarrel along the way home from school and at times hubs and I heard they were to the point of pushing and shoving. When better than now, to use this tragedy as a teachable moment. However, I chose to show the good side of the pictures.. the side of a loving brother and son.. who volunteered to fetch his lil brother from school. The side of a hardworking mom (and dad) whom despite what they do for a living find happiness and contentment for the simple things in life. Just like us. We may not have all the money to buy all the things in the world but we can be happy, live simply and be contented. We count our rainbows more than our storms...
I have 4 children God knows I love to death and I hope they can be around to count those rainbows with me awhile longer... cherish our children. -
Sun_2010:
yes, it is very tough for me, definitely more so for the parents.Kissgurami:
http://www.straitstimes.com/the-big-story/tampines-accident/story/tampines-accident-family-friends-paint-picture-close-siblings-
Video of the close siblings
I feel for the mum, literally a lifetime of pain and not easy to go through :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad: :sad:
Extract
ON MOST days, Madam Suliani Ang would have gone to pick up her younger boy Donovan Yap after school.
But on Monday, her older son Nigel volunteered to take her place. Donovan, seven, was attending his first wushu lesson and would finish only at 5pm - an hour before the start of Madam Ang's shift at McDonald's.
Nigel, just 13, did not want his mother to be late.
He cycled to Tampines North Primary School to pick up Donovan, but never made it home with his brother.
Yesterday DA said the Principal had told them about it DS. He asked me a lot of questions as we read the articles together.
This has kind of made me stop and think about the big picture, and not get worked up about the daily inanities..
chloecube, must have been hard for you. Just reading about it , made me toss and turn before I could drift off to sleep.
:sad:
when it happened, both DS and i were in the room when we heard the crashing sound, our eyes widen with fear and my legs turn jelly when i look down from the window. i was frozen for a while before i pick up the phone to call the ambulance.
by then, i looked down again, i knew they are gone...my heart just sank and it is so heart wrenching to hear the mother's wailing which could be heard from my unit..my heart goes out to her
i believe all those who witnessed the scene need time to get over it..we were all too tramatised, DS said his heart was pounding hard when we went down for dinner..God bless the brothers and families
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