桃花谈
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ChiefKiasu:
Don't think this has always worked for me..
If this happens, just click on the back button to retrieve the previous page with all its contents and then click on submit again. Do not close the window!insider:
aiya, wanna cry oredi...prepared a long msg and then clicked 'Submit' and the message returned with 'Session Expired' and my whole msg gone!!!
wait huh...
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insider:
Thanks Insider. This is a timely reminder for the upcoming CNY holidays ...All this while I know that our destiny 命 is kind of fixed. It is fixed mainly by our character (nature part, determined by the main star/s in the Life Plate) accompanied by influences of the overall environment (nurture part).
However, I am also aware that we can change our destiny to a certain extent (改运).
There is no other ways to change our destiny except by keep habouring good thoughts and doing good deeds in our life. Every single kind thought or kind action brings positive karma points while every unkind thought or unkind action brings negative karma points (shared before, the whole essence of NLP somehow is related to this abstract thing).
What is the easiest way to score many positive points?
Well, it’s by being filial to our own parents (incl spouse’s parents) as well as being respectful to other old people around us. Take for example, being kind to someone may give one 10 positive points, but being kind to parents can give 100 points. So, it is ‘easier to score points just by being kind to our own parents. (I’m writing this a bit like ‘mercenary/accounting/business’ style but the idea is never such).
Conversely speaking, the fastest way to lose the positive points and gain more negative points is to be rude and unkind to our parents (incl spouse’s parents). One rude remark or even a hidden negative thought can set one back with many negative points in multiplier effect (that’s why in my earlier post, I stated filial must be uniform internally and externally within a person, else it’s fake = negative points).
百善以孝为先. If one cannot fulfill this basic part of being a human, then even with a good Life Plate it will also turn bad and if with a bad Life Plate, it will turn ever worst. (I know there are parents who are unfit to be parents, such as those fathers raping their daughters. But I shall not go into that else I cannot finish writing this thread).
It is important for a house to be filled with as many positive points as possible and a person to be surrounded by as many positive points as possible. Therefore, it’s crucial for parents to try to control their temper as much as possible and to avoid nagging, scolding, quarreling, etc at home (concept of 家和万事兴、家衰口不停）. All these breed negative points within a home and with more and more negative points, even good stars that are supposed to be shining bright will be dimmed by all the negativities in the house = most if not all at home suffer from moodiness, low spirit, etc, and thereby breeding more negative points – vicious cycle.
For those who know me will know that I am someone who believes that parenting can be ‘effortless’ and I really do believe so.
To raise good kids, one just has to be a good person with good temper, be filial, and be kind to everyone around him/her (even towards those whom you don’t like). This will generate positive points in a person and in the family and then such points will rub on the children and they will also generate positive points = very positive family with minimal issues. NEVER expect kids to do things that you can’t even achieve yourself, such as to be patient when you yourself never really demonstrate patience in a consistent manner.
So, to have good kids means you just have to be a good person. Is that easy or difficult?
For those who have kids who are difficult to teach /defiant / rebellious have to reflect deeply themselves from where the kids’ negative points are from and perhaps try to mend their ways 改过 (which is something that many of us always want our kids to do when they make mistakes but we seldom look at ourselves and tell ourselves we must改过).
To change a child ‘effortlessly’, you can look into the major areas of your relationship with yourself (are you happy inside or you are harbouring grievances while serving the family?), your relationship with your spouse (you respecting your spouse? talking to him/her nicely? etc), your relationship with your parents (have you been giving them money or you have been spending all your money only for your family only?), and your relationship with your parents-in-laws. Improve in these major areas that you are lagging and then miraculously you can find your child changing. (note: other non major areas but also important are your relationships with your siblings, friends, colleagues，and strangers. You dont help your siblings? You betray your friends? You backstabbing your colleagues? You purposely close the lift door quickly when you can see someone is approaching the lift? etc)
Overall, kids are quite innocent coz they don’t really generate many positive or negative points. It is we adults who begin the ‘engine’ to generate, then rubbed onto them and then we complain and complain about how difficult they are to manage when we are the source of their troubles… (from the sharing of many forummers here, roughly I can tell who will have kids who will be good <allow me to single out 3boys whom I trust his sharings are genuine over the years> and who will have kids who will suffer when they grow up; the way I know how my niece will suffer if my sis insists that she doesn’t need to change).
To be continued… (this part went a bit off course thought still relevant to the overall sharing.) -
好像在追看连续剧 。。 期待下一集 。。。
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limlim:
Had that experience too...and in some occasions, was quite grateful it happened coz came to the conclusion that something are better left unsaid. :evil:
Always copy the text onto a text file first than post.. :evil:insider:
aiya, wanna cry oredi...prepared a long msg and then clicked 'Submit' and the message returned with 'Session Expired' and my whole msg gone!!!
wait huh...
learnt that lesson after experience of losing a lengthy letter to some feedback site.. -
insider,
Does the 桃花 star affect the person's appearance and/or charisma? Thanks, just curious.
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SAHM_TAN:
Today is CNY eve, cant really write detailed post and so will be taking some relevant questions first.insider,
Does the 桃花 star affect the person's appearance and/or charisma? Thanks, just curious.
桃花 star affect a person's appearance? Emmmm...yes and no are the answers.
My niece and my son both have 桃花 star/s in their Main Field.
My niece has the big ones and my son the small ones, and one is attractive in a 妩媚 style (if you see her, you'll want to 'grab' her) and one is attractive coz of very sociable and likable, aka 有人缘. (After seeing my niece's Life Plate, I actually also went to see my elder kids' Life Plates in details. Think they big enough oredi and whatever they are likely to become is more or less 'fixed' by now, not like if i go and see the plates when they were younger and then saw something good/bad and then may try to go and do something unnecessary to correct it coz that may backfire <this is another topic>).
In fact, any star/s that are in the Main Field will tell something about a person's look, but 桃花 star = attractive (need not be pretty though but will be attractive).
To elaborate more on 桃花:
When 桃花 stars are shinning on someone, even a 200 pounds short woman can have man attracted to her.
Havent you see of some errr....veli fat or even errr....ugly women still will have people holding their hands, marry, and have kids and set you thinking,
\"How come this kind also got people want huh?\",
\"How come her husband can treat her even better than mine has been treating me huh?\",
\"How come her husband eyes pasted with stamps or wat when he is rich and handsome but still can marry this kind? Why so stupid huh?\", etc.
The concept of 情人眼里出西施 is 'realer' than pearl...
Being 'Pretty' or 'Handsome' is not the real essence of 桃花 star (now taken collectively as a group of stars sharing similar characteristics)).
When 桃花 star is shinning on Person A, A is supposed to 'glow' and will stand out among the crowd like a magnet.
Then, A will catch the attention of another one (B) with also 桃花 star shinning.
If the bad 桃花 star is shinning on A, A will attract 烂桃花. (eg, a con man/woman to kena 骗财骗色, a married person to become a Small Three, someone who is totally different from him/her such as a young man falls ‘in love’ with an elderly woman or a rich girl falls in love with a garung guni man, a molester/rapist, etc).
After falling in, the person will enter a stage of 劫, a stage that they will be ‘blind’ (blinded by the light of the烂桃花 star). In this stage, that person will enter a dead end and will not be able to process information in any logical manner like what an outsider can see so clearly.
How often we lament about how someone is so stupid and so stupid to have enter into a relationship that obviously will bring more harm than good and how often that someone will insist in his/her own way that you are wrong and he is right? That is a 无明 stage whereby he is guided towards fire (quite abstract here but the 烂桃花 star will change the ‘image’ of the fatal relationships to a very good one for that someone no matter how other people view it as stupid).
无明is caused by the negative points generated in a person. When a person gets upset, angry, discontented, grumble, complain, etc, frequently, his ‘intelligence’ (智) will be covered by the negative points and the 无明 area in his brain expands, leading him to making mistakes that others cannot understand how come can be made in the first place (after the烂桃花 star faded, that someone may wake up like as if wake up from a nightmare and question and blame himself “why? Why?? WHY???”).
Everyone of us have this 无明 in us. It’s just a matter of how big or small is this 无明.
We have to hold one thing clear in our minds – that if we keep going into negative moods (of complaining, nagging, quarreling, etc), we generate negative points in a house, and these points will rub on all in a family = our own 无明 createS more 无明 in family members if those members are not wise enough.
If there’s someone close to us entering into this kind of stage (can be our spouse, our kids, or our other close ones), we have to WAIT.
Yes, we have to wait patiently, esp if our kids ever enter into a relationship that we don’t approve (my niece is likely to enter into one or more in the future). No scoldings will bring these kids back (sometimes even spouse). We can advise but have to be from a view that they are unlikely to take it coz they are in a 无明 state (can talk until cow comes home but then only chasing them further and deeper underground).
While waiting, one must have the faith that it is a temp state and all will pass for kids and we must be ready there to nurse their wounds willingly and gladly (never nurse a wound grudging or with an attitude of “see, don’t listen to me and see how now you suffer”. A grudge, even hidden in your heart = generate negative points = inviting无明 = dim good bright stars = brighten bad stars = your child may enter into another poor relationship coz you never really forgive his/her mistake wholeheartedly. By nursing wound willingly = generate positive points = 开智 = brighten the good stars = dim the bad stars = child will be able to see things clearly from thereon. Many of us have this habit of rubbing salt onto wounds with either our words or our body language - pls kick this terrible habit...).
If it is an EMA spouse, also have to wait. If everyday fight and quarrel, your无明 will breed his more无明 = you are indirectly responsible for extending the brightness of the 烂桃花. I know it’s terrible difficult to tahan and swallow but fight and quarrel will not bring one anywhere.
If you really cannot tahan, then it is advisable to divorce, otherwise, the negative points will rub on the kids, leading them into无明 state as well. My sis and my niece is a good case study for this. This family is in a big无明 state that they need light to get out of the tunnel (only if one of them can heed advice).
I do not advocate divorce BUT I do not agree with two quarrelling people still staying together coz the kids will suffer as a result of the negative Qi in the house. A house ideally should carry positive Qi most if not all the time
If the good 桃花 star is shinning, A will attract good compatible 桃花 = Happy Marriage.
Similarly, good 桃花 star must not be dimmed by negative points. Everyone has good 桃花 star shinning on us one time or another. But if during such time, we are surrounded by negative points, then the 桃花 star will be dimmed, and then we will miss our chance of getting married. Good 桃花 star is ‘seasonal’, meaning they will shine on a person only once in a few years time and so if miss it, will have to wait and if keep missing it = permanent single…
Aiya, feel a bit lo soh / incoherent but really not easy to put my understandings into words (feeling a bit 'stressed' actually coz like many aunties are interested in this.).
Basically, just avoid going into negative moods so as not to grow your 无明.
Be kind and forgiving and generate more positive points = bouncing positive points on others = others generate positive points and bounce onto you = clear minds = GOOD LUCK! -
insider,
Thank you for taking the time to post such a detailed answer to my query.
I have much to think abt.
新年快乐 -
jedamum:
Better not be a few hundred episodes like '爱'kaka:
好像在追看连续剧 。。 期待下一集 。。。
http://www.smileyvault.com/ -
Nebbermind:
Better not be a few hundred episodes like '爱'[/quote]Ok lor then 夜市人生 :evil:jedamum:
[quote=\"kaka\"]好像在追看连续剧 。。 期待下一集 。。。
http://www.smileyvault.com/
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