All About Full-Time Maids
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Hi Peapot,
Must seriously explore student care for your kid just for that one month. We should not give in to the maid’s demand. The maid might still spike your food eventhough you agree to her request.
As your hubby is taking a week leave, why dun you take the other week if it is possible. Try to urge your agent to bring in the new maid asap.
I would not take transfer maid as there must be a good reason as to why they are being transferred. Through that one interview, you will not be able to know the maid’s character. I once took a transfer maid this year. She appears happy, and agreed to work for us. Within 2 months, she ran off to the agent 3 times. I took her back as I was waiting for my new maid. The transfer maid, an Indonesian, gave the agent 2 weeks for my new maid to come. She even screamed at the agent in the agency and threatened to complain against the agent. During her last run away, she stole a number of things from my house (she ran off in the early morning), two of which are my used twice backpack and a very nice luggage bag (brand is Animal which I bought from Metro Expo Sale) with the price tag still attached. She could have taken more but I only discovered these two items missing when I looked for it as I need it for my Dec vacation.
My next maid, though new, is a cry baby. She will cry whenever you tell her that she should do it another way. She looked so pitiful that I always tried to console her. But crying wolf too many times really irritated me. She even tried to go through some of my personal things in my master bedroom. I know cos the items were placed back differently. She even took something from my room for her personal use without asking. Her work is so so, with the dishes badly washed, ie, with food particles still stuck on the bowls and plates. Table cloth was oily eventhough she said that she scrubbed it. The last straw was when she sweared in the name of her GOD when I caught her red-handed doing something wrong. That is it. She could not be trusted. When she knew that she could not get her way and my sympathy, she tried to ask for a transfer.
I gladly sent her away. -
BeautifulLife:
Dear Tamarind,Hi Peapot,
I hope you don't mind me asking. Do you feel comfortable staying under the same roof with your maid when your mindset is such that a maid is here to only work for us and nothing more?
Please don't take it that I am saying you are wrong or anything. I don't believe in right or wrong. It takes 2 to make a r/ship tick. From this thread, I realised that alot of KSP started off wanting to treat the maid nicely, but somehow got taken for a ride by them. The maids took them for granted and obviously and understandably, these employers loss hope in them. And I guess, they figured out that the best is to just maintain an employer-employee r/ship. No personal feelings attached. I can understand. I am just very very lucky that mine is great. Very good helper, alot of initiative, cheerful, plays very well with my boys.
I cannot imagine if my maid is alike those that KSP shares. I wouldn't feel comfortable living with her especially when both parties are aware that the r/ship is only tied to the working contract. Beyond the contract, no personal feelings.
It is because of her niceness that allowed me to shower her with that little bit more care and feelings towards her.....
I hesistated a long while before I hit the 'submit' button on the above post I addressed to Peapot. All because I am well-aware there is alot of nonsense going on from some of KSP's maids (my heart goes to these employers), I was very skeptical if I would cause any misunderstanding that I am telling people what I am doing or my mannerism towards my maid is the right way and anyone not behaving thus, is not right. Nope! My maid's niceness allows me to treat her the way I am treating her. That's why I kept mentioning I am lucky to have her. If she is like anyone of your maids you mentioned, gosh, I don't know how to deal with it.
I have been following your blog (the one where employers share their maids' misgivings) and I really feel for you. Not easy to live with someone who doesn't appreciate your kindness.
I asked peapot that question cos I am curious how all of you feel living with your maids who are giving you guys problems. The question I asked was more out of empathy, cos I think I will feel miserable......
Hi peapot,
Thank you for not misunderstanding my question. You must be so hurt that your maid of 3 years seems not to have enough personal feelings attached to your family.... -
skunk:
Have you tried Skype ? I always use Skype to call USA, UK, China, etc, it is very very cheap. Skype allows you to call from a computer to a mobile phone or fixed line number. All I have to do is put in 10 Euro dollars in my account and it can last for a long time.I gave her a $10 Pheonix card to call home....and she's been having trouble connecting to a handphone line in West Timor...
I was so disgusted that you actually get charged the moment the call is connected to the Indo side, whether they actually pick up the call or not....lost $7 just merely listening to \"poo poo poo\" or \"the phone is not switched on, please try again later...\" :x
any solution to cheap n reliable calls to Indonesia? -
peapot,
I agree with the others that you should put your girl in student care center. It will train her to be more independent. Who knows, you may not need a maid after all !
BeautifulLife,
It is great that you understand our difficulties.
But do you realize that your maid is turning bad because you are too nice to her ?
I used to have a maid who is very good. Because of her, my life was so easy with my baby boy since birth to 2 years old. I bought her diamond necklace, treated her to meals at the Raffles Hotel, brought her to Hong Kong Disneyland, etc. She had the freedom to go out whenever she wanted to. My mother was very angry with me because she thought that I treated the maid better than I treat her.
After 2 years, I discovered that the maid had many boyfriends, and even met with her boyfriend when she was bringing my girl (3 years old at the time) to school. I sent her away as soon as I found out.
When she left, she smiled and said that I cannot do without her, and that I will definitely bring her back after a while.
Of course I never brought her back.
That maid could have been a good maid, if I have not spoilt her.
If I have been strict with her all the time, treating her like an employee, she will be more more motivated to work hard. Because I was so nice to her, she thought that she could do anything, and I would not send her away.
To be very honest with you, I think that you are making the same mistake with your maid. The fact is that you kept feeling lousy. If your maid is really a good maid, you will NOT be feeling lousy. My current maid is a wonderful maid, she makes my life so easy, and I feel very good with her around. But I don't treat her like a family member, and she knows that. She always stays in the kitchen unless she has work to do in other parts of the house. In fact, I did not have any house rule stating that she must do that, but she knows that is what a good maid should do. Her ex-employer has trained her well.
I sincerely hope that all turns out well with your maid. -
:hugs: peapot. Sorry to hear about your troubles. Hope it clears up soon for you. Remember there's always light at the end of the tunnel. Good luck!
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Hi peapot,
If I am you, I will send her straight home.
Why do her a favour by allowing her to go for interview?
If she wants the job, she has to find ways to come back to Singapore.
I am glad that your child is already 6.
Do put her in a student care.
In the meantime, pressurise your agent to bring in your maid asap or take a transfer maid instead.
Your current maid is OBVIOUSLY BULLYING you!!!
How can you allow that to happen?
If I am you, as much as I don’t want, I will rather take a week of leave or even unpaid leave just to send this pest away! Why make her life easy when she is making your life hell!!!
You never know she might be planning a scheme now. BEWARE!
Beautifullife,
It doesn’t matter how nice you are to the maid or how nice she is now, it takes only a bat of the eyelid for her to change without warning! -
I’m sure a lot of working parents over here will repay your boss with good working attitude if your boss treats you well and reward you. You will work better and hoping for a better reward in future like promotion or pay raise.
So, it’s only natural for parents to treat the maid well if she treats your children well by buying gifts and holidays. Initially (only for a short time period, because they kept thinking why you reward them), these maids will appreciate your generosity but sooner, they think it’s their rights and your duty to buy them gifts and holidays. They thought they have become the BEST overnight. And they slack in their duty unless you reward them.
Don’t know why, their mind works differently from us. I wonder if the air they breathe in smells differently.
I’m only speaking of my experiences, if your maid happen to be one that will continue to have better working attitude after rewarding, you are truly a lucky one hell of an employer.
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Dear peapot,
Sorry to hear about what you are going thru with your maid.
My previous maid extorted money from me. :x This was after about 2 years with me (I treated her very well, as you can read from my previous posts). I was 2 wks into my confinement after the birth of my 3rd child then. She thought that I could not do without her and that I would give in. Well, she got the wrong person!! :x I happen to be very headstrong and sent her packing that very same night!!
Be strong and don't let your maid treat you like a doormat. YOU are the BOSS. If I were you, I'll send her balik kampung & let her figure out how to fly back here to attend her interview. You'll breathe easier without this pest in the house
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2ppaamm:
Doggie is giving me a lot of headaches but what to do, I love it to bits. No choice, I have to sacrifice and I don't want to give away because I don't have a helper. It's not fair to the four legged though.
Haha, I deploy the robots when I am out or sleeping.mocharita:
Hey, how about investing in a robot? You can get them at about $800 at Courts and they will clean your house routinely. You don't even need to remind it to clean and your floor is always spotless. I have 5 of these.
If you need help, I will try and get one for you.
2ppaamm,
Thank you
I have checked on the robot before. As a SAHM, I work faster than this robot.
It has nothing to do with housework. Cleaning, dusting and mopping things around the home are not a chore to me. I find this chore rather therapeutic. Floors are dead, furniture-dead, and curtains-dead, laundry-not a problem at all..ahem, I don’t know how to iron though (I’m still learning.) Once you have cleaned them, they are cleaned. It’s the ‘cleaning after someone’ that puts the strains on me.
The living things around my home said goodbye to me one after another. Plants, fish, plants, terrapin, plants..
Thankfully, my kid is still much alive! And my lovely doggie too..teeheehee..
I forgot about the living things... Plants - keep them alive through the irrigation system. I took 2 days to install them with my bare hands, which ended up with lots of blisters but I thought it was worth it. You can have a great patio/garden with these fantastic stuff. I saw some plant shops selling these in Singapore recently. If you want a garden again, try it. Will you be buying CNY flowers?
I said goodbye to my pet African grey (a kind of bird) as well. I am afraid of pets and had to give it away since DH travels a lot and nobody could clean up after it. Sad, because it spoke like 4 languages, so cute.
I stopped rearing kois. Now, my 2 ponds have tilapias. In case of famine, I will turn to them. I am serious. I rear them for food because I realise I spent too much money on fish food, so I kept the pond for food fish. :lol:
You're better than me! I cannot handle a dog! I am also afraid of dogs and cats. I thought that is even more difficult that anything else! For the kid, give him a cup with his name. In my household, if I don't do that, I'll have 70 cups to wash everyday. They have to wash their cups if they want to drink! Ha ha!
Honestly, if I do get a maid again is because of this fella. Somehow, I feel rather stupid for doing so.
I've tried ironing and learning from friends but still don't get it. Silly me, sent 4 dresses for pressing and cost me $42. I was thinking of getting a part-timer to come in for 3 hours with that amount, at least ironing and cleaning included. -
mocharita:
Yah, good idea, get a part-time to do the ironing. Much cheaper. I think it is about $12 or $14 an hour. Gather all your ironing and ask her to do. Plus change bedsheets, clean the floor, windows, and if 3 hours, about $36. Quite worth it, hor?Doggie is giving me a lot of headaches but what to do, I love it to bits. No choice, I have to sacrifice and I don't want to give away because I don't have a helper. It's not fair to the four legged though.
Honestly, if I do get a maid again is because of this fella. Somehow, I feel rather stupid for doing so.
I've tried ironing and learning from friends but still don't get it. Silly me, sent 4 dresses for pressing and cost me $42. I was thinking of getting a part-timer to come in for 3 hours with that amount, at least ironing and cleaning included.
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