No Problem is problem

[3Boys]

buds:

3Boys may not realize that his words doesn't fall on deaf ears of us
learning housewifeys... his words make emotional impact when you
take time to truly read between the lines. I mean, like how not to be
or get emotional when you hear him saying how intensely he loves
his wife? The lucky chick.. :celebrate: This toast for you, Mrs3Boys. :lol:

Now, still waiting for 3Boys to share some tips from his wrap-around-pinky
manual... :please:

Urrr......pay attention to the simple stuff ladies. Men are simple folk, turned on by a few things :evil:

All the tricks you used you used whilst courting, well, dust them off....

Also, you know the adage about women hitting their s....l prime in middle age, let me tell ya, its all true... :drool:

C'mon, take some time out for yourself, get your hair done, start an exercise program, eat well. Feel good about yourself, start looking good. Sorry if it is a little superficial, and obviously this is not all there is, for a loving relationship requires other pieces as well, but this is important.

Another, the was a blog article about the 5 Love Languages. It is a good read and worth paying attention to. Sometimes what we do seems to miss the mark with our spouse, because we react to and perceive things differently. I ran through it with my wife and I have to say it has made moderate impact, so I recommend it.

Intensity of Love? Measures by Cs, as in something that rhymes with an orange coloured conical root.....

[Angelight]

Good sharing, 3Boys!


And thanks for recommending my blog article on the 5 Love Languages. DH and I benefitted from it and I thot I should share it on KSP Forum. Good stuff must share share rite?

[DesertWind]

3Boys:

C'mon, take some time out for yourself, get your hair done, start an exercise program, eat well. Feel good about yourself, start looking good. Sorry if it is a little superficial, and obviously this is not all there is, for a loving relationship requires other pieces as well, but this is important..

Hear, hear, 3Boys!
Yeh, this is my challenge, to look good!
Somehow my hair perm gets out-dated really fast and after colouring, soon the colour changed or out-grow and hair looks bad again! Sigh....! No time to go hair-dresser too!

Also, I desperately need a tailor to tailor clothes that looks good on me. Necklines that fit me best are those square-neck types but you won't believe how difficult it is to get ready-made ones! Anybody with a good and reliable tailor to recommend please let me know!

As for putting on make-up, yes, I diligently do it daily but lets just say it is more to make sure I maintain my image at work (so that boss won't see me and think of me as passe or \"over the hill\" or \"no longer\" young and put me on the chopping board). Yeh, I know I should do it for my hubby but that's what I am driven by lor... :oops:

Every morning my husband will peck me on my cheek before leaving for work. I can't peck him back with lipstick on so I try to do it other times at home.
It is an effort yes but heart-warming to the recipient so lets do it! :love:

[buds]

buds:

3Boys may not realize that his words doesn't fall on deaf ears of us learning housewifeys... his words make emotional impact when you take time to truly read between the lines. I mean, like how not to be or get emotional when you hear him saying how intensely he loves his wife? The lucky chick.. :celebrate: This toast for you, Mrs3Boys. :lol:


Now, still waiting for 3Boys to share some tips from his wrap-around-pinky
manual... :please:

3Boys:

Urrr......pay attention to the simple stuff ladies. Men are simple folk, turned on by a few things :evil:

Reali? And that's reali IT?

3Boys:

All the tricks you used you used whilst courting, well, dust them off....

Honestly dahhling....... if you ask me.... back then,
during the courting period, no tricks were required. Yap..
all au naturale... and all came naturally...

I mean they ARE (the guys) doing the woo-ing right? :lol:

But i truly mean, i honestly don't think i reali did need to work on it.
You're making me think very hard right now..

3Boys:

Also, you know the adage about women hitting their s....l prime in middle age, let me tell ya, its all true... :drool:

Err... ... not great with these fill in the blanks puzzle now... so what
does that s....l stand for..

3Boys:

C'mon, take some time out for yourself, get your hair done, start an exercise program, eat well. Feel good about yourself, start looking good.

Alternatively, husbands CAN also take the initiative to sound out the ladies
right? I mean, if it's gonna benefit both.. then husbands can consider
making the 1st move to initiate the work to be done... starting from the
one that probably requires immediate attention.. :lol: Ya know like, \"Hey,
darl... join me @ the gym? After which we'll head down 4 some light dinner
followed by a movie to end the day?\"

\"By the way, I've parked the kiddies at mom's..\"
The above part is important, as it seems wifeys are the ones who usually
needs to work out the kinks about the kiddies. It helps that once in a while
when maintenance work needs to be done, wifeys do not have to think abt
the \"how-to's\"... if ya noe wat i mean..

3Boys:

Sorry if it is a little superficial, and obviously this is not all there is, for a loving relationship requires other pieces as well, but this is important.

Very true.

I understand where you're coming from, 3Boys. I had to go through that
the hard way. From FIL calling me a whale... to MIL giving me sarcastic
remarks (ie. abt it being natural for men to fool around in circumstances)
and whatever the F#@* she conjured in her brain to hurt me intentionally
and of course my marriage itself.... then finally, to HIM eventually telling
me (almost directly how fat and distasteful i was... :() & that i needed to
honestly honestly do something about my body... but the way everyone
told it, was so hurtful that i took it negatively. By then, hubs was way too
fit from all his routine runs and the few marathons while i was still laggin'
behind... That; to me was a wee bit unfair. The headstart was major cos
HE was going through the 'phase'... mid-life crisis... pre-andropause...
personality disorder... ... itchy backside ... or mebbe all of the above.
HE just didn't deliver the message properly nor sincerely... it was all too
much criticising... on top of problems with ILs... issues at work... all that
embroiled into a mountain of shit that rocked our marriage BIG time. It
hit me then that i've failed... not in being a good mom and a good wife
cos i KNOW darn well that for sure i was not only good but an exemplary
one... but i have failed myself; as me. I forgot about me. How could i?
Well, the journey with the counsellor did it for me.. i honestly needed
that. I'm glad i did.

3Boys:

Another, the was a blog article about the 5 Love Languages. It is a good read and worth paying attention to. Sometimes what we do seems to miss the mark with our spouse, because we react to and perceive things differently. I ran through it with my wife and I have to say it has made moderate impact, so I recommend it.

Yup, react & perceive differently... i agree... we sometimes do that don't
we... albeit unintentionally. Hubs did mention before that i took things
badly when all he wanted to do was something good. Well, guess it was
not that well executed, huh. :laugh: Niwaes, i did take note of that too..
It was like... all those little things he said (yah, in codes.. :roll:) that
needed deciphering.. so hey, since you mentioned it made moderate
impact, i'll give the read a shot.

3Boys:

Intensity of Love? Measures by Cs, as in something that rhymes with an orange coloured conical root.....

Men and their root.. :lol:

Slightly more than a year later after a huge family ordeal, a neu bod, neu
haircut, new found stamina and rekindled love and friendship, i'm knocked
up.... again.... for the 3rd time.

You men and the c's hawrite... :roll:

Thank god this time we finally have a crib to call our own.. now, this...
truly helped with everything else that slowly came into place... well,
here's the hormones in me doin' the talkin' again...

I know i have sacrificed a lot... more than the average woman in fact...
to see this through... i sure as heck hope it is all worth it... i'm not the
sort who makes vows for the sake of it... even though he isn't exactly
my soulmate.

I'm staying positive. What didn't kill me makes me stronger.....

[3Boys]

Good luck buds, always nice reading your posts :celebrate:

[buds]

Hey yeah.. it wouldn't hurt to get a lil bit of luck.

Guess that little fairy dust could come in handy on
and off, yah. :lol: Likewise, the pleasure is always
mine too... when reading yours, 3Boys. :celebrate:

You have a way of telling it that makes me sit up &
pay attention. Thanks for your advices. I do
truly appreciate it. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php

[Funz]

3Boys:

Another, the was a blog article about the 5 Love Languages. It is a good read and worth paying attention to. Sometimes what we do seems to miss the mark with our spouse, because we react to and perceive things differently. I ran through it with my wife and I have to say it has made moderate impact, so I recommend it.

Intensity of Love? Measures by Cs, as in something that rhymes with an orange coloured conical root.....

The book is a good read. A friend gave me a copy years ago when I was struggling to continue with our marriage. They do have another version written specially for men.

All these time, I know DH and I are very different in our temperaments and needs, etc. I am practical, down to earth while he is more flamboyant and temperamental. I show my love, concern and commitment by doing things for the person and being there for them. DH on the other hand will use a lot of words and praises and gifts. Weird but he seems to have more of a women's temperament then I do. I keep saying that he doesn't get me and I do get irritated by all these frivolous gifts.

After reading the book, admittedly, I am still having problems speaking his love language. I am trying, but it is simply not me.(hence his feeling lonely and depressed) However, knowing what his love language is, I learn to appreciate those frivolous gifts.

Ok, I'm rambling. Anyways, my point is, it is also important to recognise your partners' love language. Not so much so that you can speak his language but so that you know when he is speaking it to you. Get what I mean?

[jedamum]

Funz:

Weird but he seems to have more of a women's temperament then I do.

i always tell my dh that he is the wife and i am the husband (emotionally) in this marriage; he is more needy, more petty while i am more insensitive.
i read \"men are from mars, women are from venus\" and agreed with most of what was written.

[Funz]

jedamum:

Funz:

Weird but he seems to have more of a women's temperament then I do.

i always tell my dh that he is the wife and i am the husband (emotionally) in this marriage; he is more needy, more petty while i am more insensitive.
i read \"men are from mars, women are from venus\" and agreed with most of what was written.

:celebrate:

But hor, cannot let DH hear anyone saying he more like a woman in this relationship. He will be upset.

[buds]

Funz:

The book is a good read. A friend gave me a copy years ago when I was struggling to continue with our marriage.

Nice to hear another person endorsing this book, i'm looking out for it.

Funz:

They do have another version written specially for men.

See-rye-ious-ly?
Good too?

By the same author?

Is Gary Chapman the same guy who was invited
on Oprah Winfrey's show to discuss \"Why Men Cheat?\"

Funz:

All these time, I know DH and I are very different in our temperaments and needs, etc.

Hubs and i are total opposites. Period.

He was my mom's choice so to speak..
I had a few proposals but she chose him and
only him.. saying if i did not take him as my
husband, there won't be anyone better.

Funz:

...my point is, it is also important to recognise your partners' love language. Not so much so that you can speak his language but so that you know when he is speaking it to you. Get what I mean?

I geddit, Funz!

Things are way better than it was last year and the year before... but
can never hurt to know more.. i think i should get HIM the book, so he
can understand MY love language. :politebleah:

:lol:

His primary fault is i honestly think, he takes me for granted. :roll:
Like i'm supposed to kinda attitude towards life...
Supposed to do... supposed to know... supposed to understand...
Men, you know? :siao: Their many codes... :roll: :lol:

Anyways, my fault was not appreciating him enough.. so he says.
So, i seriously look into it and realise i actually don't 'teh' enough.
Again... men, you know.. take us for granted just know that all
things get done.. & still have to 'teh' to make him feel appreciated.
So, i have been busy learning the art of 'teh'-ing to the point i got
knocked up. :laugh:

Funz, i hope you are well.. :snuggles: