In-law problems?
-
Hi Ningning,
Since their attitude is so bad, you don’t have to be nice to them anymore. I also have a SIL who thinks that she is a big shot as all the family members are "afraid" of her. I used to respect her like a sister but I don’t give a damn now since she doesn’t deserve my respect. You don’t have to "entertain" them, just lead your own life with your DH and be happy. -
Sometimes wonder, is MIL trying to play 'home politics'.
When DH home a bit later, she'll quickly eat and then quickly clear her plates. But when DH home on time to all eat together, she refused to join us (like very pitiful like that) & be the last to eat. After my family's meal, I'll washup before retiring to room either to do some personal stuff or coach kids' on their schoolwork. She will immediately eat after we go into room and besides cleaning up her own plates, will start cleaning stove/pots/basin etc LOUDLY. So much so that DH came & questioned me DID I clean up our plates or leave it all to MIL....how come she's take soooo long in the kitchen :mad: I barked back at him not to doubt me in this manner....ie. leave dirty plates for MIL to wash.
I'm not a good cook.....but once in a while, does cook well a dish or two enough to earn some 'praise' from DH & kids. Last week, I cooked something to their liking but a little too saltish (eat with rice ok lah).......MIL kept quiet. But the moment DH commented would be healthier if a little less salty, MIL immediately came adding on 'Yah too salty, no good for health. Too saltish how to eat, difficult to eat blah blah blah etc etc'. But you know what, her own cooking she'll claim saltish nicer. And every dinner, before she even tried my dishes, she pour soy sauce over her rice/soup before tucking in.....and of course, DH din know about all these.
All these trivial little actions (not just the 2 mentioned of course), really make me wonder what is MIL trying to do? Am I being over-suspicious?
>70yo but her mind still very clear.....maybe that's what keeping her on her toes and avoid dementia :rotflmao: -
Cannot stand it. Just overheard what MIL told my gal.
SIL (also DIL) went for 4-day business trip so only left MIL’s son to look after the toddler. MIL said to my gal "baby no mommy nevermind. Anyway baby dun look for the mommy, only look for daddy. Just the daddy is enough already, no Ned mommy’. Gosh, what kind of rubbish is she sprouting!! She did that to me last time too. I remembered once when I was rather sick when both kids were young, so I din go near them to avoid spreading, so DH was taking care & carrying the younger one. And right in front of my face, she told my elder boy pyscho-ying him by saying ‘you like daddy more right? got daddy good enough’. grrhhhh -
BeContented:
Cannot stand it. Just overheard what MIL told my gal.
SIL (also DIL) went for 4-day business trip so only left MIL's son to look after the toddler. MIL said to my gal \"baby no mommy nevermind. Anyway baby dun look for the mommy, only look for daddy. Just the daddy is enough already, no Ned mommy'. Gosh, what kind of rubbish is she sprouting!! She did that to me last time too. I remembered once when I was rather sick when both kids were young, so I din go near them to avoid spreading, so DH was taking care & carrying the younger one. And right in front of my face, she told my elder boy pyscho-ying him by saying 'you like daddy more right? got daddy good enough'. grrhhhh
That happened to me too!! It's AWFUL!! Somehow, I found it in me to forgive her because she seemed to know not what she did... It's a bit like a child's jealousy.
When my daughter was 2, she would push her father away from me when he came to hold me close. We thought it was cute. When it is a MIL, it isn't cute. But if you can ensure that no one else is influenced by her propaganda then just ignore lor... and look a bit poor thing. -
Chenonceau:
BeContented:
Cannot stand it. Just overheard what MIL told my gal.
SIL (also DIL) went for 4-day business trip so only left MIL's son to look after the toddler. MIL said to my gal \"baby no mommy nevermind. Anyway baby dun look for the mommy, only look for daddy. Just the daddy is enough already, no Ned mommy'. Gosh, what kind of rubbish is she sprouting!! She did that to me last time too. I remembered once when I was rather sick when both kids were young, so I din go near them to avoid spreading, so DH was taking care & carrying the younger one. And right in front of my face, she told my elder boy pyscho-ying him by saying 'you like daddy more right? got daddy good enough'. grrhhhh
That happened to me too!! It's AWFUL!! Somehow, I found it in me to forgive her because she seemed to know not what she did... It's a bit like a child's jealousy.
When my daughter was 2, she would push her father away from me when he came to hold me close. We thought it was cute. When it is a MIL, it isn't cute. But if you can ensure that no one else is influenced by her propaganda then just ignore lor... and look a bit poor thing.
My MIL did to me too the last time she took care of my boi. I am kinda lucky cos both of my children are v sticky to me. Her mind-psycoing quite useless .... -
Last time when MIL see DH carrying the kids, she would go pat and ask the children 'You love daddy more than mommy right? Daddy better in taking care of you right?' Wonder what do they reap from saying such stuff to kids? Soooooo pathetic. They forgot they are the mommy too.
Was imagining :evil: ....if one day, right in front of her face I tell DH -
'I better than your mom in taking care of you right? Got me no need your mommy right?'......wonder will there be world-war 3
-
hi becontended,
not war world 3 lah. couldnt help but want to paste a picture. dont get mad with me okay........ :evil: :siam:
![](\"http://i55.tinypic.com/nvtd9k.jpg\")
http://i55.tinypic.com/nvtd9k.jpg\">
-
LOLMum:
wah....so UGLY :rotflmao:hi becontended,
not war world 3 lah. couldnt help but want to paste a picture. dont get mad with me okay........ :evil: :siam:
I'll continue to :imconstipated: anyway, DH thinks she is low EQ & will just let her be & get her way. So no point i turn KINGKONG only.....
-
BeContented:
Long long time ago my mil used to said that to my first born. I am the type that react fast withouch thought. I quickly corrected her that \"ma, that is not true. Then I sing the chinese song 世界自由妈妈好 and quickly reaffirm her that \"that is why DH dotes her more\" and then gave the innocent look and a pat on her shoulder. Immediately she keeps quiet and never repeat this childish act of hers.Last time when MIL see DH carrying the kids, she would go pat and ask the children 'You love daddy more than mommy right? Daddy better in taking care of you right?' Wonder what do they reap from saying such stuff to kids? Soooooo pathetic. They forgot they are the mommy too.
Was imagining :evil: ....if one day, right in front of her face I tell DH -
'I better than your mom in taking care of you right? Got me no need your mommy right?'......wonder will there be world-war 3 -
I think those of us (including me) who have difficult MILs need some counselling or at least to talk it out/confide with someone trusting (usually not our hubby cos it may put them in a difficult position even if they are on our side). If not, all the pent-up hurts and resentments may have long term adverse effects on our emotional and even physical well-being.
What are some of your ways/methods to purge the "in-law toxic" from your system? Let’s share and perhaps learn from one another…
Hello! It looks like you're interested in this conversation, but you don't have an account yet.
Getting fed up of having to scroll through the same posts each visit? When you register for an account, you'll always come back to exactly where you were before, and choose to be notified of new replies (either via email, or push notification). You'll also be able to save bookmarks and upvote posts to show your appreciation to other community members.
With your input, this post could be even better 💗
Register Login