In-law problems?
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janet_lee88:
Hear no EVIL, see no EVIL... Although sometimes I am curious what are their conversation is, but most of the time not knowing will be a blessing for me...
Honestly, why bother to know what they are so talking ? It's better NOT knowing bcos like what buds mentioned, it affects our moods for the day or even the whole week. Forget it...let them yak or whisper all they want...not worth it.buds:
if you do get to know (what the whispers were abt) it either affects your mood through the day or week... or it may inflict feelings that may not be so healthy towards hubby. At first the sensitivity will be brushed often but after a while of training, hope you won't fret your pretty self over it. :hugs: It won't be worth it.
Janet_lee88.. i agree that they can be soo close that they ignore and give in to bloody nonsense attitude. I find because they don't make a stand and condone, they will show some more. :roll:
So long as SHE doesn't get in my way or my life.
they might nt appreciate my side of sharing n comment thou cos they tot they noe every single thing. As long as they leave me alone I will be more than happy.
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Don’t find out what is going on in hubby’s conversations with his sister…it will drive you nuts and spoil your mood. Honestly, it’s so true that ignorance is BLISS.
Before his sister came back, she told him she wanted to get books to coach her angmoh son in basic Chinese. My hubby asked me if I had any. Told him sweetly, ‘All given away…younger one already in P2. Who wants them ?’
Actually deep down I am very pissed…I thought he wants to be secretive with the sister…why ask for things ? Although he is the one who paid for the books, I am the one who spent hours in Popular combing through suitable books. Why should I make it convenient for her ? -
janet_lee88:
Don't find out what is going on in hubby's conversations with his sister...it will drive you nuts and spoil your mood. Honestly, it's so true that ignorance is BLISS.
Before his sister came back, she told him she wanted to get books to coach her angmoh son in basic Chinese. My hubby asked me if I had any. Told him sweetly, 'All given away...younger one already in P2. Who wants them ?'
Actually deep down I am very pissed...I thought he wants to be secretive with the sister...why ask for things ? Although he is the one who paid for the books, I am the one who spent hours in Popular combing through suitable books. Why should I make it convenient for her ?
Janet... i like your eloquently tai chi style....
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racoon12:
Hey racoon,janet_lee88:
Actually deep down I am very pissed...I thought he wants to be secretive with the sister...why ask for things ? Although he is the one who paid for the books, I am the one who spent hours in Popular combing through suitable books. Why should I make it convenient for her ?
Janet... i like your eloquently tai chi style....
I love to do spring-clean
...once there is no use for certain books/stuff, I will bring them downstairs or else give them away.
Forgot to add this: books are not freehold property. :rotflmao: -
I’m blessed with great in laws, but some of my friends have real horror stories about theirs.
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jessrav:
Mine is a nightmare.it will take pages for me to pen it down.In short, a totally nightmarish experience.and I have to \"report\" to her house every once a week just for kids to play.if not hubby will have a war with me as he values close family ties. Yep,we are oth very different with our values....not that I am not close to my family.we have different styles in bringing up the kids, which is very stressful.
me too. once a week have to put up at his sister's place where all the siblings and kids will gather, have lunch and then gossip about their
spouses/in laws etc. This will take up almost the entire day and ending with a dinner outside... OMG can you imagine 15-20 people looking for
seats in food courts on a Saturday evening? so alway proceed to restaurant bec they cannot bear to sit apart even during dinner :siao:
And during school holidays, again it's travelling with them and squeezing
into suite rooms bec they like to sleep/travel/eat/ as a family.
So far I had only 1 chance to travel alone as a family (3 of us), it was a 4 days trip to HK and it was a nightmare bec my husband kept saying things like 'so sian, just 3 of us' 'my sisters/brothers will love to eat this'
'you buay paiseh meh, just 3 of us travelling' 'no fun like this leh' 'next
time make sure you arrange for my sis/bro to come otherwise I am not
coming' :mad: :nunchuk: :spank: :pokeeye: :heresmyfish: :roll: -
hehe, pinky, you just described my family leh.
I am ok with going on trips with just DH and the kids. But really, for me, the ones with my parents, sisters and even cousins along are a lot more enjoyable and memorable.
With DH’s family, it is the opposite. Everyone is in a hurry to move on or totally absorbed in their own stuff. We use to go to IL’s hse on either Saturday or Sunday for dinner. When we arrive, DH will let himself in, FIL will be glued to the horse racing channel and jotting stuff down on his notebook, MIL will be in the room doing whatever, SIL is never around. So we just park ourselves on the sofa and do whatever we fancy. Then when dinner time comes, MIL will ask FIL how, FIL will ask DH how and we will say eat out. So we head out and have a rather silent dinner, send them home and that’s it.
I find it so sad. -
me too. once a week have to put up at his sister's place where all the siblings and kids will gather, have lunch and then gossip about their
spouses/in laws etc. This will take up almost the entire day and ending with a dinner outside... OMG can you imagine 15-20 people looking for
seats in food courts on a Saturday evening? so alway proceed to restaurant bec they cannot bear to sit apart even during dinner :siao:
And during school holidays, again it's travelling with them and squeezing
into suite rooms bec they like to sleep/travel/eat/ as a family.
So far I had only 1 chance to travel alone as a family (3 of us), it was a 4 days trip to HK and it was a nightmare bec my husband kept saying things like 'so sian, just 3 of us' 'my sisters/brothers will love to eat this'
'you buay paiseh meh, just 3 of us travelling' 'no fun like this leh' 'next
time make sure you arrange for my sis/bro to come otherwise I am not
coming' :mad: :nunchuk: :spank: :pokeeye: :heresmyfish: :roll:[/quote]
Travelling with my MIL put a strain on me. I cant never be a good DIL dun noe how to rub a shoulder with my MIL.
For my hubby, he had an experience travelling with my MIL and his bro & family (minus me....). Came back he was telling me, wow very challenging, being a referree btwn his mum and sil....
So far he never suggesting travelling with them again... touch wood.... as the experience forged a deep impression on him... -
racoon12:
Hear no EVIL, see no EVIL... Although sometimes I am curious what are their conversation is, but most of the time not knowing will be a blessing for me...
Honestly, why bother to know what they are so talking ? It's better NOT knowing bcos like what buds mentioned, it affects our moods for the day or even the whole week. Forget it...let them yak or whisper all they want...not worth it.janet_lee88:
[quote=\"buds\"]if you do get to know (what the whispers were abt) it either affects your mood through the day or week... or it may inflict feelings that may not be so healthy towards hubby. At first the sensitivity will be brushed often but after a while of training, hope you won't fret your pretty self over it. :hugs: It won't be worth it.
Janet_lee88.. i agree that they can be soo close that they ignore and give in to bloody nonsense attitude. I find because they don't make a stand and condone, they will show some more. :roll:
So long as SHE doesn't get in my way or my life. they might nt appreciate my side of sharing n comment thou cos they tot they noe every single thing. As long as they leave me alone I will be more than happy.[/quote]Yup. :celebrate:
As long as they leave you out of all the unwanted drama... safe. :preen: -
jessrav:
Mine is a nightmare.it will take pages for me to pen it down.In short, a totally nightmarish experience.and I have to \"report\" to her house every once a week just for kids to play.if not hubby will have a war with me as he values close family ties. Yep,we are oth very different with our values....not that I am not close to my family.we have different styles in bringing up the kids, which is very stressful.
I used to have to do that. :mad:
It was really a pain.
Sometimes we end up not having quality time over the weekend. Can be due to affected issues end up both of us bad mood and then the work week starts all over again. Sianz. Not to mention not healthy for marriage. But still the man doesn't realize that. :skeptical: Rather allow marriage to suffer to please parents and their whims.
Can your hubby alone be the one to report strength?
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