In-law problems?
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vinegar:
If she wants to puff all day...by all means.it means there is no way ur MIL quit smoking.
my hb also my MIL favourite son! But she doesn't aware that my hb very dread to receive her call. hb also dislikes going bk coz he hates seeing his SIL.
anyway,planning to migrate...
told myself that i muz nt like my MIL in future,it would only drive ur children away. -
I suppose a lot of our MIL /SIL requests stems from the fact that they feel disconnected or even lonely. Usually those that are otherwise does not have an active lifestyle or social life. They make a lot of requests (or demands) that seems otherwise illogical. But in fact, it is a reflection of their loneliness and insecurity. Sometimes when I get angry with MIL / SIL I remind myself of this theory. Makes it easier to forgive and forget.
E.g. SIL refuses to pick up IT skills like copying files into CD - she gets my DH to do it everytime she wants to do this - middle of the night, weekends, etc. Taught her so many times for so many years but still… She also refuses to decouple her mobile phone bill from my husband’s bill, and wants my husband to pay. She makes more than DH - - but this is like a "connection" that she refuses to change.
MIL gets my husband to read her bills and mails (but the highly educated SIL lives with her! and she is totally capable or reading!). They also get my husband to fix everything in the house (not that he is even good at it)… but really, they just want to feel that DH is still around, and still part of them. -
ur SIL is very dependent on ur hb.
agree wf u that this is sign of their insecurity n loneliness.So they seek attn to fulfill their needs.If they’ve active social lives & purpose in life,for e.g. volunteer in community,they r able to divert their attn n energy somewhere.
My MIL doesn’t hv to worry for $$ n hsework. She has all the things to be taken care of.Thus, her focus is to find out what we’re doing n tries to interfere.yes,she is a control freak n my hb always says this is her nature n i’ve to accept.
The irritating part is my hb shares everything wf her! I told him off everytime. Even irritated him by telling him that ur mum treats u like daughter than son! -
AdonciaTang:
I have 3 boys and if anyone starts asking me to try for a girl, I will tell them it's too late as I have officially closed my factory and it is very expensive to reopen it.... :heresmyfish:
LOL. They have nth better to do. I have 2 sons as most of you know and yet I was targeted as not having a daughter. I felt so sad whenever they ask me why dont try for the third one to have a girl. And now that I wan to adopt, I can hear them talking and saying that I cant conceive and so onjanet_lee88:
Actually, most people do not understand it is the MAN who provides the Y chromosome to have that precious son. I have 2 (a girl and a boy...no offence to anyone) and yet get bothered with 'what about a 3rd one?'
These people really have nothing to talk about...so pathetic. -
I have a girl and a boy. Whenever pple ask me why not have another or another girl and another boy. I tell them I want but both DH and my parts not working properly, what to do. It will usually end with them saying aiyah, ok lah, 2 oredi summore 1 of each gender very good oredi.
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Funz:
I have a girl and a boy. Whenever pple ask me why not have another or another girl and another boy. I tell them I want but both DH and my parts not working properly, what to do. It will usually end with them saying aiyah, ok lah, 2 oredi summore 1 of each gender very good oredi.
I have a girl going to be 9, and a boy who just turned 13. Another one??? :dowan: factory certified closed. My SIL just gave birth...the idea of sleepless nights, jabs and fever, teething pain, baby refusing to sleep and the growing up pains all over again is scary. Sorry, no to $8000. -
My DC are 9 and 13 too. No $ can tempt me to have another child. I had been lucky to have employers with very progressive benefits (over and above the current legislation) and very understanding managers who allow me to utilise them. But age had caught up, absence of trusted help and coupled with job insecurity, thanks but no.
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Coolkidsrock2:
My DC are 9 and 13 too. No $ can tempt me to have another child. I had been lucky to have employers with very progressive benefits (over and above the current legislation) and very understanding managers who allow me to utilise them. But age had caught up, absence of trusted help and coupled with job insecurity, thanks but no.
My mornings are quiet and definitely my personal time although i can't go out as I need to cook lunch. Having another child means my life will go haywire. It was so wonderful to go maid less...but with another kid, I don't think I can do without a maid...but a maid is so expensive and not necessary reliable. Education has become so demanding now...I will be 50 lugging a 9 year old kid...I must be nuts to reopen the factory. No thank you. $8000 is not worth all these again. -
That $8000 is not to get pple like you to change your minds. It is to help those who want kids. It is not to pay for your kids but to help ease some of the financial burden. And the total amount is more than $8000.
We get it, those who already have kids and do not want anymore will not be swayed by any amount given. Those who want the DINK lifestyle will not be swayed by this either. But there are those who want kids and this will help ease some financial burden.
Anyway :offtopic:
Back to tackling those irksome relatives who ask and ask. Me thinks no need to get upset or think up excuses. Just straight in their faces, our family, our decision, you plan and manage your own family, I plan and manage mine, ok.
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Back to main topic.
Having reunion dinner today… So sian…SIL ordered dinner. Also bought disposable plates/cutlery bcos nobody willing to wash. 根本就不团, eating this dinner defeats the real purpose…youngest BIL doesn’t want to see eldest bro and his wife dislikes my hubby for dumbest reason…long long story…purpose so fake.
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