Child adoption
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EN:
My niece who is 2 years old is also adopted as her adopted mother developed some womb problems after giving birth to her son.I dont have experience of adopting a child but my niece is adopted. My sister after her first miscarriage is not able to conceive as her womb is weak.
My niece is not aware she is adopted. When she was about 3 years old, my sister brought my niece to see her elder sisters and little brother in the neighbouring country. Her natural mother just died of motor cycle accident pregnant with her 5th child. Her natural father lost among the addicts, not sure if he is dead or alive.
My sister and her hubby loves their daughter very much. Both my kids adore their cousin and my children are not told of their cousin history either. My father dots on this beautiful child. My mum loves her too but I could sense some reservation and biasness towards her own flesh and blood.
The younger generation ie my kid's generation is not aware that she is adopted as requested by her adoptive parents.
Regarding grandmother's biasness toward her grandchildren, in my case i feel that my mother in law prefers her daughter's son than my son and daughter. Weird isn't it? Own grandson bearing her family name don't want to look after, even at that time i told her just watch over the maid.
Instead she gave up her full time job to look after her daughter's son.
In retrospect, i am glad i have tide through those times without her help, and have grown to be independent. I was lucky to have a responsible and dependable maid at that time who was like a nanny. -
EN:
Sense of reservation, always comes from the grandparents, I have seen it. They always favour their own flesh & blood, why can't they show the same affection to another being. My mother does that, she adores my neice with gift, and love. When my cousin comes by with her adoptive child, she does not even touch her, saying not sure where the child comes from. It really hurt my feeling, thus I always show more affection to my cousin's child then to my own sister's daughter. My mum was not happy about it. My standing is the adoptive child needs more support/love then our own.I dont have experience of adopting a child but my niece is adopted. My sister after her first miscarriage is not able to conceive as her womb is weak.
My niece is not aware she is adopted. When she was about 3 years old, my sister brought my niece to see her elder sisters and little brother in the neighbouring country. Her natural mother just died of motor cycle accident pregnant with her 5th child. Her natural father lost among the addicts, not sure if he is dead or alive.
My sister and her hubby loves their daughter very much. Both my kids adore their cousin and my children are not told of their cousin history either. My father dots on this beautiful child. My mum loves her too but I could sense some reservation and biasness towards her own flesh and blood. -
My father gave more attention and love to my sister’s daughter. He said, my kids have all the things in the world and my niece should have more too. I don’t mind such remarks. Knowing my father, he indulges all his grandchildren but more to my niece earlier on as my sister was a sahm. My mother doesn’t show her reservation but told me that she does not feel close to my niece. I reason with my mum that the reason she feels closer to my kids are because, she look after mine and not my niece. Looking after my children will remind her of my naughtiness but for my niece, there’s no similarities to my sister. I understood how my mum feels. They just came back from a short vacation. I hope the short vacation will make my mum feel closer to her other grandchild.
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EN:
My father gave more attention and love to my sister's daughter. He said, my kids have all the things in the world and my niece should have more too. I don't mind such remarks. Knowing my father, he indulges all his grandchildren but more to my niece earlier on as my sister was a sahm. My mother doesn't show her reservation but told me that she does not feel close to my niece. I reason with my mum that the reason she feels closer to my kids are because, she look after mine and not my niece. Looking after my children will remind her of my naughtiness but for my niece, there's no similarities to my sister. I understood how my mum feels. They just came back from a short vacation. I hope the short vacation will make my mum feel closer to her other grandchild.
Do you think that after staying with the adoptive family from birth, doesn't the child takes up the mannerism of the adoptive families. I saw my cousin's child speaks and act exactly like my cousin. Its weird, but I think after eating/sleeping and always being with her does have effect with the child in their growing up. Its funny :lol: -
hi, anyone noe how long will be the adoption process n how much is d legal fees…txs
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I’ve heard true life stories where the adopted child later became more fillial to his/her parents (as compared with the bio ones).
In any case, a story I read long time back. This adopted child told her tormentors (bio child) "My daddy and mummy had a choice and they selected me, yours didn’t choose you, they had no choice".
I have 2 kids of my own, and probably (never say never) won’t want to add the the human population - will be more prone to adopt a child becos I feel that love is nurtured and not born. I love my kids not becos they came from my womb, but becos I have seen them grow and have grown with them. -
Cinta:
hi, anyone noe how long will be the adoption process n how much is d legal fees....txs
It took nearly a year to complete the adoption. Has for legal fees, if I am not wrong it was about $2000. Hope it helps -
mum03:
txs.Cinta:
hi, anyone noe how long will be the adoption process n how much is d legal fees....txs
It took nearly a year to complete the adoption. Has for legal fees, if I am not wrong it was about $2000. Hope it helps -
Sorry, I don't mean to purposely bump up such an old thread but I came across this video from zaobao today and thought it's worth viewing. Hopefully sharing it on a thread like this will reach out to those who have interest in this topic.
https://www.zaobao.com.sg/news/singapore/story20220622-1285630
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BC0gS2Ij-xw] -
I saw this pop up counter at Clementi mall sometime back regarding child adoption.
It’s really not easy to adopt a child. Even with the same amount of love showered on the child like own child, will he/she want to find biological parents one day? I remember when my kids were much younger and gave me problems, it was hard to handle. When my daughter was rebellious at 15/16, it was so stressful. But then they are my kids.
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