SA2 2009

[watmekiasu]

I would examine what went wrong and discuss possible solutions with child.

[zyberk]

jesschan:

Yep. I always tell my son that he will be rewarded for effort put in, not just for the exam marks.

me too ... the effort put in is more important.

For me, result is used to find the 'weakness' points and find ways to strengthened that.

I found that with this approach, the child is less stressful - more interested in performing well (aka giving the best effort) rather than the exam marks.

I remember reading a story (i think on the net) about a child that did not return home after getting his result because his marks is not that good and is afraid his parents will scold him. Very sad ...

[raysusan]

zyberk:

jesschan:

Yep. I always tell my son that he will be rewarded for effort put in, not just for the exam marks.

me too ... the effort put in is more important.

For me, result is used to find the 'weakness' points and find ways to strengthened that.

I found that with this approach, the child is less stressful - more interested in performing well (aka giving the best effort) rather than the exam marks.

I remember reading a story (i think on the net) about a child that did not return home after getting his result because his marks is not that good and is afraid his parents will scold him. Very sad ...

very good point to take note :: :celebrate:

[watmekiasu]

I hear of many cases, of children being scolded/punished for not scoring high marks for the SA exams. I feel that most parents should ask themselves "Could I have done any better, at their age?".

[zyberk]

watmekiasu:

I hear of many cases, of children being scolded/punished for not scoring high marks for the SA exams. I feel that most parents should ask themselves \"Could I have done any better, at their age?\".

even now at my current age, i'm not able to answer some of the questions

[watmekiasu]

zyberk:

watmekiasu:

I hear of many cases, of children being scolded/punished for not scoring high marks for the SA exams. I feel that most parents should ask themselves \"Could I have done any better, at their age?\".

even now at my current age, i'm not able to answer some of the questions

Me too, no shame in that. :lol: That's the major reason why I'm on this board - to learn from some kind parents on how to tackle some of those confounding math questions. :?

[tankee]

jesschan:

Yep. I always tell my son that he will be rewarded for effort put in, not just for the exam marks.

me too !

as long as he had tried his hardest. Having good results is a bonus.

of course deep down I would be a bit disapointed if he had tried his hardest and yet failed to achieve good results.

on the flip side, I would be very disapointed but secretly proud if he had not put in any effort and had achieved very good results.

[Keroppi30]

I always go thru my dd’s papers and access the reason for the poor performance and take action from there…

[MMM]

To be frank, I would be disappointed.


I think alot voice down to individual expectations. In our case, I am not expecting my kids to score full marks or top the class but rather do what they are capable of, if they can’t then of course I would be disappointed.

During SA1, my P2 girl came back with bad results (IMO). This is despite that we put in place a nightly revision time since beginning of the year. It was like a new year resolution for mummy that we must try to drive this. It was painful for everyone initially but we all got used to it along the way. Kids knowing that they must start studying at 8pm and mummy keeping dinner short and also no shopping/ tv/ idling time when I reach home.

So when I saw her SA1 results, I was very disappointed. It’s not just about her but also us. Is what we are doing insufficient? ineffective? how else can we do better??? There was alot of self questioning.

On the other hand, when I saw the actual papers, the poor results was attributed by careless mistakes and other stuff. I can understand if the child don’t understand and hence dunno how to answer, but I cannot tolerate careless mistakes. I would usually pick on those careless mistakes and give them a piece of my mind. This is something I always emphasize to them, did you check the papers, did you write neatly, make sure for those given answers copy correctly, etc…

Looking back, I think it was a good learning experience for my girl. She experienced disapppointment herself when she saw her own results. She came back very confident after each paper saying it was easy but when the results came back, it said otherwise. In fact, her chinese teacher told us that she cried when she saw her own results. If you look at it differently, it’s probably a good sign that she knows what’s going on. It’s not about facing parents but herself. She has always been proud of her own chinese results so how can she do so badly???

From the papers, we also identify strengths and weaknesses. Then try to build on the weakness so that the kids can do better next time.

For SA2, I managed my expectations, I didn’t dare to have any. I told myself if she did better than SA1, that would be a bonus. I can see that she worked hard for her SA2, never complain when I give her more practise papers,etc… she just did it diligently. She came back the other nite, saying that she has good news to share. Her results. She was also acknowledged by her teacher for her significant chinese performance. But the most important to us this time round was not her results. But she found back her self confidence and she was proud of her own achievements.

I asked if she remember how she felt when she saw her SA1 results, she did. I asked her if she likes how she is feeling now. If she does, then she must continue to work hard. If you want to be happy after the results, then work hard before that.

So I think sharing disappointment is perfectly normal but do it in a constructive way. We are disappointed so how can we make it better?

[hquek]

hi mmm,


Your story reminded me of my first year in JC. I was strong in one subject and fairly sure of myself. For the first year’s exam, I thought I would do well, but ended up just passing the paper - this was mainly due to careless mistakes. Could see my lecturer’s disappointment in his face.

Suffice to say that I became more careful and aware that carelessness can sink ships (not to mention fail papers) - and my lecturer’s faith in me was definitely restored the following year. I was fortunate that my failings appear in Year 1, rather than the all important A levels.

What I mean to say is, sometimes disappointments and failures at the appropriate times will wake us to what is important and can actually help us to correct our wrong assumptions in time for the big exam in time to come.

Very glad that your DD is able to ‘catch’ where she should improve and has done well subsequently. Jia you!