I just read it and I get what you mean! This is why I prefer to read NYT — very personal stories too, but the angle is clear. I had my first kid at 29, so not young at all, in comparison! But that feeling of not being prepared is universal…

We noticed that a lot of people are still popping in to this thread. At KiasuParents, we’ve recently posted some content that may be helpful: https://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/article/divorce-in-singapore-what-parents-need-to-know https://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/article/divorce-in-singapore-can-this-be-avoided-can-relationship-counselling-help https://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/article/having-problems-in-your-marriage-try-these-relationship-tips-from-a-family-court-specialist If you feel comfortable, post your story here, and we can try to offer support or at least a listening ear.

I have one neighbour gf (previously we lived on the same floor), who is one of my most-trusted friends now! We text each other pretty often and meet up once in two months or so. The friendship happened because of timing — we lived on a floor with 3 other young families, kids were all under 10, and we left our doors open every day. I think the first icebreaker was me helping my gf to contact other moms with spare breastmilk via the SG Motherhood forum! Then we just got close after that. At the time, we always popped in and out of one another’s homes to have coffee and let the kids play with one another. I was wfh but freelance at the time, so I had more energy to devote for all of this, including the clean up afterwards! All the families moved out after 5 years and our new neighbourhood has more of the bingo/retirement vibe haha. We’re comfortable with most neighbours and trust the family next door, but nothing like lift landing xmas parties, having a communal foosball table, or any of the other stuff from our previous neighbourhood

@thebottomsupblog said in Over familiarity vs needs: @sharonkhoo @rinsider Wondering how you both define “sparks?” I think physical chemistry/attraction is essential when you first meet someone and want to date them. “Sparks” - physical attraction, but also just the excitement in spending time with the person? As you said, like the early years of courtship and marriage. My take is that it’s unrealistic (and emotionally exhausting!) to experience that all the time through a long marriage. But the occasional spark is good (maybe essential) in a long marriage? Expectations of how this will look like and feel like should change over the years; if not, there is bound to be disappointment. It would be sad (I feel) if there is no longer that joy when we meet after a day apart, or that interest in hearing what the other is currently working on, feeling deeply or concerned about etc. And there’s great joy in being able to share memories, build on shared experiences, share jokes, etc. My kids sometimes complain that we read each others’ minds, and they can’t follow our thought processes because they aren’t verbalised!

[image: 1773282260370-whatsapp-image-2026-03-11-at-14.37.56.jpeg] Shared this on my stories yesterday! In my own family, relationships are not perfect, but our ethos is to never trouble others. My husband’s family is more of “let’s share our troubles and joys”… but as an observer, what I see is that people are more often weighed down by one another, than lifted up. My husband’s aunt visited us two weeks ago. She’s almost 60, and she remarked that she felt she had aged so much over the last 10 years. And yes, many things happened on their side. From bigger problems like financial irresponsibility, to daily communication habits that stir negativity more often than foster closeness. For me, I keep myself very busy and try to avoid “hasslers” as best as I can! It can be very challenging to hold boundaries, especially in close-knit Asian families.

@rinsider said in Curfews and such!: @sharonkhoo that’s cool that they know how to inform and update! Back in my time, I never let my parents know where I was and they didn’t bother They’re girls! My parents were even stricter with me - I had a “nightfall” curfew (unless I had arranged to be sent home by a trusted friend’s parent or stayed over with a trusted friend - trusted by my parents!) until I went to university! I studied in the UK, so it wasn’t feasible for them to control me then - even email hadn’t been invented yet! My parents were less strict with my brother, and I might have been if with sons if I had any. Anyway, we regard informing the rest of the family as a gesture of courtesy and consideration, and with WA now, there is really no reason not to inform. All of us keep the rest informed if we are doing something outside our regular schedule, or we’re going to be back later than expected.

@concern2 The older generation were more likely to see becoming a SAHM as being permanent? Among those I know (and myself), most see it as a temporary phase, although possibly one that could last up to 10 yrs, I guess. For me, I was a SAHM for 17 yrs, mostly because I had kids and we lived overseas for most of those years. Working wasn’t feasible. Even after returning to Sg, I only worked freelance/part-time and did voluntary work because one of my kids needed more support (learning and other needs). Otherwise, I would probably have returned to full-time work. For those I know who became permanent SAHM, it’s mainly because they are wealthy enough not to need the 2nd income, and for some, they are very involved in something else - eldercare, voluntary work, etc. I don’t know what “other countries” PM was referring to, but from what I’ve seen, women will return to work after the SAHM years when they have (or can afford) more home help, or working hours are more flexible, and their children are expected to be more independent. Just realised I replied to a very old post! Different PM then. Doesn’t changed my response.

@waqar3214 said in Navigating Parenting Challenges with Asperger's Syndrome: Navigating Parenting Challenges with Asperger’s Syndrome Relationships 1 1 143 Reply waqar3214 20 Sept 2024, 17:41 Supporting Kids with Asperger’s: Effective Strategies and Resources As parents, we often face unique challenges when raising children with Asperger’s Syndrome. It’s important to foster their social skills and emotional well-being while ensuring they feel understood and supported. Communication is Key: Engaging in consistent, open conversations at home can reinforce the skills they learn in therapy. Collaborating with psychologists to establish clear social boundaries can provide a structured environment for your child to thrive. For additional support, consider exploring resources like Seattle Hypnotherapy Services to help your child with emotional regulation and self-empowerment. These approaches can be valuable in complementing traditional therapies. If you’re looking to expand your own skills to better support your child, Professional Hypnotherapy Training Courses can provide valuable insights into effective communication and coping strategies. Thank you for sharing these insights! Raising children with Asperger’s Syndrome definitely comes with unique challenges, but your emphasis on communication and structured support is spot-on. I especially appreciate the focus on collaboration with psychologists and creating a consistent environment—it really helps children feel secure while developing social skills.

A networking and sharing online session for parents who want to play a proactive role in their adult single child life partner journey Friday 8 Mar 8pmhttps://matchmakers.sg/index.php?option=com_community&view=events&task=viewevent&eventid=1&Itemid=124