Does type of housing really matters?
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Humans will always want to compare with one another. This is not a bad thing, it’s a good thing…it’s what drives progress.
Recent studies with monkeys have proven this. 2 monkeys are rewarded with the same reward for performing the same trick, in full view of one another. (rewarded with a nut or something). Then, one of the monkeys is suddenly rewarded with something more delicious, like a banana or a grape, can’t remember in the actual report lol…the other monkey flew into a rage and refused the nut, even refused to perform the trick!
Don’t say children, even adults compare among one another. The person that doesn’t compare, is one that doesn’t improve.
Of course, overt comparison at a very young age is more detrimental than beneficial…but making a hoo-ha out of it is even worse. I would suggest ignoring such issues or just brushing it off by saying, "they’re so lame ah, only know how to compare this kind of thing…it’s not even their own house, it’s their parents’ house lor!" Or something like that. To harp on it would be even worse, cementing the belief that it’s indeed something very important in Life.
Cheers. -
starlight1968sg:
Most of the citizens live in a hdb flat. What kind of mentality is this?
yeah, beats me.
hv stayed in condo & landed property while based overseas & don't know why the mentality here is such :? -
Jennifer:
:lol: tks for yr advice. i tried to explain that we cld but we prefer to stay in hdb so that we can see them grow up & not leave them in the company of maid.There are many big cars parked in HDB carparks. Plus these group of pple have smaller exposure to housing loans. In fact, these group of pple could be richer than those living in prime districts paying hefty housing loans and need to be on dual income arrangement.
Tell your dd these and to ignore those ignorant pple. JMHO -
mathsparks:
true but guess this is norm amongst kids. just that if our kids happened to go to \"90210 beverly hills\" in spore, the yardstick wld be different.these kids are only in p1, I thot they only become snobbish in Sec1..
scary indeed and when you think that the kids must have gotten the idea form their parents.
brace yourself, cookiemonster. coz I doubt the qns will end there..next they'll be asking what make of cars their parents drive, what jobs their dads have and so on... -
True friends won’t bother about who your parents are, how much they earn or what type of car they drive, much less the type of houses they live in!
In school, it’s all about your results and your behaviour/personal growth.
I think you did a good job explaining to your girl that it’s not that you cannot afford but choose to sacrifice a condo/landed property for more time spent with her.
Tell her to work hard to prove to those people that staying in a big house or expensive house does not mean they’ll always be successful. That will be the best way your girl can prove her worth to herself and everyone else, plus make daddy & mummy very proud.
Actually, my parents & I also have the same concern. Hb & I are not big earners. Our income is comfortable for us with 1 child now and we are staying in a 4 room flat. My boy will attend NYPS when he goes to P1 cos it’s my hb’s alma mater and the other schools around our area (Punggol) are rather difficult to get into. My parents are considering moving to Bukit Timah for their grandson’s sake. Hb & I have decided not to move at all, even if we could afford it next time. If we are going to move just to ‘match the social status’, what impression will we be giving our son? -
westmom:
Well i did hear from my fren whose kid was in the lower primary school then (in so called elite school) that her child dared not invite friends to their hdb home. Apparently some of her classmates look down on hdb kids....oh gosh...this is more common than you think. Oh dear ..i fear for the future generation that will be so class conscious...
somehow i believe as parents, we also contributed to the social divide mentality that our kids exhibit.
thus, when DH was posted to overseas couple of yrs ago, we tagged along to expose them to the living conditions abroad. we hv stayed in different type of housing & when we came back we felt that ultimately HDB is still the way to go in order to spend more time with the kids.
we, at 1 pt or another in time also do experienced such issues. i strongly remembered my previous reporting officer upgraded fm HDB to landed property with a hefty grant fm parent's & in-law's assistance. i was like :!: when she told me she did it to keep up with the \"Joneses\". -
Blobbi:
yup, that's what i told my DS & DD too.This is quite shocking and sad. Maybe she's in a girl's school, and girls are more aware of such things at an earlier age? In any case, so young become snob liao, sigh.
I always tell my son it's not his money, and that what we have is due to the hard work of his parents. He has to go earn it himself or he'll have nothing to rely on when he grows up.
we told them we will support them till tertiary schooling. after that, they are on their own. -
I agreed with mrswongtuition.
Whether we (parents) live in a hdb flat or condo, does it make a difference in parenting?
No offence to those live in private properties!
If all the classmates have been to USA or Europe for holidays, are we going to match this area too?
What sort of upbringing are we giving to our future generation? -
NicHei:
haiz..... parents got to do with all these kids attitute. Cannot imagine the behaviour and attitute of these kids when they grow up
agree 101% -
MMM:
i think this doesn't happened only to sch in prime area. neighbourhood sch also hv. just that whether kids remember to share with their parents.:shock:
Do let us know if your kid's school is in the prime area to solicit such a response.
My kids' school is located in the housing estate area. So quite a number of their friends stay in HDB and such questions never arise.
But if the kids really behave that way. That is really sad. It probably reflects the kind of parents they have....
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