Why does MUM has to make all the Decision?????

[Misty]

As a FTWM, there are lots of times that I feel I am carrying the load alone.


The husband helps in ferrying the kids around but I do not feel that I get much support in other areas. If I guessed correctly, he leaves it to me since we have two girls and I am the automatic choice to deal with the "female" issues.

I am very tired … but what can I do.

So, for the husbands here, your wives might be screaming for help and support and you don’t even know. I wonder what the husbands will do if their wives just collaspe or give up totally …

[ZacK]

Misty:

As a FTWM, there are lots of times that I feel I am carrying the load alone.


The husband helps in ferrying the kids around but I do not feel that I get much support in other areas. If I guessed correctly, he leaves it to me since we have two girls and I am the automatic choice to deal with the \"female\" issues.

I am very tired .... but what can I do.

So, for the husbands here, your wives might be screaming for help and support and you don't even know. I wonder what the husbands will do if their wives just collaspe or give up totally ....

Hi Misty,

I'm sorry that I would not be able to offer professional advice but I do sense that you are probably up to your nose and attempting to look for a life-saver to hang on to.

Have you tried having a chat with your husband and letting him know how you are feeling? You may start by telling him that you appreciate how he is helping to ferrying the girls around and then continue to add that you are however still finding it difficult to cope and suggest if he could perhaps take on additional role etc?

Best is if you could identify specifically which areas you would like your husband to help in and not just leave it as \" could you pls help out more around the house??\" ... Personally for me, if I am not doing enough, I would appreciate if my wife could tell me exactly how she would like me to help her to reduce her burden. Hope this helps

[ChiefKiasu]

ZacK:

...Have you tried having a chat with your husband and letting him know how you are feeling? You may start by telling him that you appreciate how he is helping to ferrying the girls around and then continue to add that you are however still finding it difficult to cope and suggest if he could perhaps take on additional role etc?


Best is if you could identify specifically which areas you would like your husband to help in and not just leave it as \" could you pls help out more around the house??\" ... Personally for me, if I am not doing enough, I would appreciate if my wife could tell me exactly how she would like me to help her to reduce her burden. Hope this helps

ZacK... that is such excellent advice that I would have put it up for Portal publication if it had been written in a more self-contained way.

[ZacK]

ChiefKiasu:

ZacK:

...Have you tried having a chat with your husband and letting him know how you are feeling? You may start by telling him that you appreciate how he is helping to ferrying the girls around and then continue to add that you are however still finding it difficult to cope and suggest if he could perhaps take on additional role etc?


Best is if you could identify specifically which areas you would like your husband to help in and not just leave it as \" could you pls help out more around the house??\" ... Personally for me, if I am not doing enough, I would appreciate if my wife could tell me exactly how she would like me to help her to reduce her burden. Hope this helps

ZacK... that is such excellent advice that I would have put it up for Portal publication if it had been written in a more self-contained way.

Thanks for the encouragement ... I'm glad that my 2cts worth is of some help. Forums thrive only if their members contribute and share experiences so that \"wheels\" need not be re-invented :idea:

But I lost you there when you referred to \"self-contained way\" :oops:

[tanlengleng]

Misty:

As a FTWM, there are lots of times that I feel I am carrying the load alone.


The husband helps in ferrying the kids around but I do not feel that I get much support in other areas. If I guessed correctly, he leaves it to me since we have two girls and I am the automatic choice to deal with the \"female\" issues.

I am very tired .... but what can I do.

So, for the husbands here, your wives might be screaming for help and support and you don't even know. I wonder what the husbands will do if their wives just collaspe or give up totally ....

TELL HIM, don't hint.... TELL HIM!!!

[sashimi]

Ha ha ha, hilarious you lot.... :lol:


OK, well... I seem to be a black sheep among men. I was and still am very interested in parenting. I think it stems partly from my interest in human behaviour and relationships, my love of girls (esp those aged 3 - 36) and I think i deal with certain respects of parenting better than my DW....

Anyway, here's what I think about the topic, why men evolved to let mummy make all the decisions.

NUMBER 1 REASON, NO CHALLENGE:

Case Study 1A:

DW: Darling, would you prefer A or B?
Me: You sure I have a choice? .... OK I like A.
DW: But if we pick A, then this-that-cannot. B might be better.
Me: If you alr picked B, you ask me for my opinion for what???? :stupid: :stupid:

Case Study 1B:
DD: Daddy, which one do you choose?
Me: Mmmm, I like the rabbit one.
DD: .... But I wanted to choose the rabbit...
Me: [sianz.....] :roll:

Case Study 1C:
DD: Daddy, which one do you like?
Me: Mmmmm, I \"like\" the blue one. [actually blue one sucks, pink one nicer].
DD: OK! Then I take the pink one! I knew you would choose the blue one!
Me: Yes sweetheart... (your daddy very well-trained by now....)


NUMBER 2 REASON

Case Study 2A:

DW: Blah blah blah clothes nag nag nag iron blah blah mess blah DW yadda yadda fish yadda nag nag nag windows nag nag blah blah blah.....
Me: [Start | Programs | Wife | Nagging Neutralizer and Voice Tune-Out Module]
DW: yaadda yodda nag blah yadda ..... So how?
Me: Mmmmmmm.... up to you lor.



I got more reasons, I write later.

[buds]

Heyya sashimi,


Yer case studies...
Amusing as hell man!!
Wuakakakakakakaaaah!
Joker you..

I'm gonna wait how DW will respond to this.
(Rubbing both hands together)

And lets await the next episode.. heheheh.

PS : Yadda okaylah.. Yoda?

[ZacK]

sashimi:

Hahaha do share more... Cos this is my daily dose of laughter's the best medicine :lol:

[heutistmeintag]

ChiefKiasu:

jedamum:

I can already visualise....

Mrs CKS: Do you love me?
CKS : I love you.
Mrs CKS: Do you think I'm getting fat?
CKS : I love you.
Mrs CKS: Does this look nice on me?
CKS : I love you.

Darn... was I so transparent? Looks like I've got to start thinking of something else to say

How about
1) If I could to turn back the clock, I would still marry you!
2) I would still marry you in the next life.

Hmm, no liabilities wor ...

[heutistmeintag]

Misty:

I am very tired .... but what can I do.

So, for the husbands here, your wives might be screaming for help and support and you don't even know. I wonder what the husbands will do if their wives just collaspe or give up totally ....

I do not wish to be insensitive to your problem(s), but just to digress abit, I hear those statements all the time from my mother, mother-in-law, wives, females friends and colleagues etc

I am a WFHD and do my fair share of household chores, my wife still complains and expects me to do more. Sometimes I wonder if it's human nature ...