$350k for 1 child?

[tree nymph]

tamarind:

I was awarded a scholarship to study maths in NUS, but I rejected it and went to engineering instead because I dreamed of becoming an engineer. My mother did not want me to by indebted by study loans, so she took on 2 jobs to pay for my fees. Both my parents had very low paying jobs. I deeply regretted my choice now. I should have taken up the scholarship or study loan so that my mother did not have to work so hard. She worked everyday from 7am to 11pm, and she still had to do all the housework at home. At that age I was not matured enough, and now when I think about it, I was really a very bad daughter and I felt heavily indebted to her.


Now I am trying to repay my mother by giving her a good allowance every month, and also bringing her to overseas trips every year.

I do not think that by paying for everything for my child, will make her a better person in the future.

[list]

[corneyAmber]

tree nymph:

maybe?



:hi5:

:hi5:

[buds]

tamarind:

I told my kids that I am keeping track of how much I pay for them now, and in the future when they start work they have to pay me back


I know many parents will criticize me for being calculative, but it is only my way of telling my kids not to take things for granted.

Tam darling, i keep ALL receipts in my BIG book since the first time they
enrolled in kindy. :evil: How? Track secure anot? :lol:

No one has a right to criticize others cos we all have our own way of doing
things especially when it comes to raising our children. :hugs:

Children SHOULD NEVER take things for granted. That's definitely a start.
That's why before the girls sleep each night, i remind them to count their
blessings. This way they reflect and learn to appreciate even the littlest
things in life. And... the simplest things in life CAN be rewarding more
than we know it.

[buds]

tree nymph:

ksi:

[quote=\"tree nymph\"]
then again, even if I can afford, i will tell my kids i can't... heheheee... just been kiasu in case they slack and expect me to pay for their expensive education and enrichment and maybe tuition too!

:celebrate: :celebrate: How come we so similiar...are you my long lost twin? :lol:

maybe?



:hi5:[/quote]Make that triplets! Hahaa! :lol:

My situation is easier since i dun work. :evil:
So, it's always poor mummy has no money... :rotflmao:

Just the other day, i told them they could each get something
from the convenience store. A snack that they like. Thinking that
they'd be more than elated, i was taken by surprise when both came
to me, rubbed the top of my head/hair and said, \"It's ok mummy. Save
your money. You came in here to just get a loaf of bread... that will do...
That's enuf mummy. Dun waste $ remember. We still have plenty of other
food to eat at home, dun need extra cookies or candies & all that junk stuff.\"

I feel light then... and extremely surprised they could verbalize it that way. :love:

While i was intent on still getting them each their favourite cookies, i held
back and thought... hey, i should be setting the example not breaking it!

[HyperKiasu]

tamarind:

I prefer not to follow the western style of unconditional love like \"The Giving Tree\" by Shel Silverstein. I would rather my kids learn from the http://tamarindvillage.blogspot.com/2010/03/books-about-filial-piety.html books

i dun agree here.
most westerns start to earn a living at much earlier age than Chinese....
they emphasize individualism, independence more than we do....

[tree nymph]

HyperKiasu:

tamarind:

I prefer not to follow the western style of unconditional love like \"The Giving Tree\" by Shel Silverstein. I would rather my kids learn from the http://tamarindvillage.blogspot.com/2010/03/books-about-filial-piety.html books

i dun agree here.
most westerns start to earn a living at much earlier age than Chinese....
they emphasize individualism, independence more than we do....

yes, most normal family will probably get the kids to save and earn their colleage fees. But when emphasize individualism, and freedom they tend to forget about their parents. I think that is whAt Tam is saying.

[dimsum]

buds:

Tam darling, i keep ALL receipts in my BIG book since the first time they
enrolled in kindy. :evil: How? Track secure anot? :lol:
:

buds, WOW! u actually keep ALL receipts!! I am impressed!

[JonC]

Maybe Tuition from Pri to JC for all subjects will be about 100k.

[tamarind]

buds:

tamarind:

I told my kids that I am keeping track of how much I pay for them now, and in the future when they start work they have to pay me back


I know many parents will criticize me for being calculative, but it is only my way of telling my kids not to take things for granted.

Tam darling, i keep ALL receipts in my BIG book since the first time they
enrolled in kindy. :evil: How? Track secure anot? :lol:

No one has a right to criticize others cos we all have our own way of doing
things especially when it comes to raising our children. :hugs:

Children SHOULD NEVER take things for granted. That's definitely a start.
That's why before the girls sleep each night, i remind them to count their
blessings. This way they reflect and learn to appreciate even the littlest
things in life. And... the simplest things in life CAN be rewarding more
than we know it.

buds,
Wow I like your style of keeping ALL receipts

Thanks for your support !

[tamarind]

tree nymph:

HyperKiasu:

[quote=\"tamarind\"]I prefer not to follow the western style of unconditional love like \"The Giving Tree\" by Shel Silverstein. I would rather my kids learn from the http://tamarindvillage.blogspot.com/2010/03/books-about-filial-piety.html books

i dun agree here.
most westerns start to earn a living at much earlier age than Chinese....
they emphasize individualism, independence more than we do....

yes, most normal family will probably get the kids to save and earn their colleage fees. But when emphasize individualism, and freedom they tend to forget about their parents. I think that is whAt Tam is saying.[/quote]tree nymph is right.

In \"The Giving Tree\" by Shel Silverstein, the tree which symbolizes the parent, gives everything to the boy that it loves. The tree expects nothing in return, the boy just keep asking more and more until the tree is only left with a stump. I am only referring to this unconditional love.

In the west, individualism and independence mean that when the kids grow up, parents may never see them again. I heard that many westerners plan to spend their last days in old folks home (there may be exceptions, I am not trying to make a general statement).