Any parents here ever felt pressurized by others?

[vicki]

I am the kancheong spider. Hb is the relaxed and calm turtle!!


So, hopefully we are a ‘balance’ for our kids!!

[singmathstutor]

I believe it’s important to know what’s best for yourself and more importantly, your kid. Don’t be influenced or affected by what others are doing for their kids. Everyone has their own ideals for them. Be it, to join an excellent school, numerous enrichment classes…etc. It doesn’t have to be a "monkey see monkey do" scenario. Sometimes, over-pressurizing kids may have adverse effects. Just let them be well-paced in their development and remember, a good childhood will ensure they grow up well.

[starlight1968sg]

If one were to say that he/she isn’t influenced or affected by others, then he/she is lying.


When you see people’s kids doing much better than yours, don’t you have a sour feeling?

When you see your peers driving a big car, live in a big house, carry branded good etc, don’t you feel that life is such unfair?

When you see lesser fortunate people, don’t you feel relieved that your 4 limbs are healthy and you can walk & play?

…

We are all easily influenced by external factors. What makes a better person is to be able to control the negative influences and think positively in the long term.

Sigh… I am just feeling lousy that my junior has a higher chance for promotion! :x

[Brenda10]

markfch:

I also have friends who are very sure about themselves. This group of parents does not succumb to the frenzy of the rat race. They are really cool and collected during P1 registration. And a lot of the parents I know from this group were actually formerly from top sch themselves (but not pri level). They say that let nature take its course, whatever will be will be.

It could be this group of people is hiding their cards or may be they believe in 路遥知马力。

Just my 2 cents thought :lol:

[mrswongtuition]

Brenda10:

markfch:

I also have friends who are very sure about themselves. This group of parents does not succumb to the frenzy of the rat race. They are really cool and collected during P1 registration. And a lot of the parents I know from this group were actually formerly from top sch themselves (but not pri level). They say that let nature take its course, whatever will be will be.

It could be this group of people is hiding their cards or may be they believe in 路遥知马力。

Just my 2 cents thought :lol:

Agree. Some of them may not want to share with you what they are sending their kids to and put up a 'carefree' attitude in front of you. Behind you, they are madly surfing KSP to dig more info about the schools you are sending your kids to and trying to find even better schools to send their kids.

But I know of another group who keep saying that enrichments are useless and there's no need for such rat races. In reality, they can't afford it. So they say there's no need for it

[markfch]

mrswongtuition:

Agree. Some of them may not want to share with you what they are sending their kids to and put up a 'carefree' attitude in front of you. Behind you, they are madly surfing KSP to dig more info about the schools you are sending your kids to and trying to find even better schools to send their kids.


But I know of another group who keep saying that enrichments are useless and there's no need for such rat races. In reality, they can't afford it. So they say there's no need for it

From my circle of friends, there are really parents who are doing well financially but still decided against going all out for their kids to achieve academic excellence. They say that the big fight will be at secondary level and by then, it's really up to the kids' own motivation. So their children really look happy and enjoying their childhood.

[Gecko]

vicki:

I am the kancheong spider. Hb is the relaxed and calm turtle!!


So, hopefully we are a 'balance' for our kids!!

Vicki,

It is generally like that, hubby relaxed and wife kancheong. My wife hates it.

Gecko

[Leanne]

I have relatives and friends will tell me, let them be , anyway, i cannot get them to study.But, they are still trying to push the kids to work whenever they can.


I know not many parents will tell the truth how much they have been making their children to "run the race"

That is just one cent of my thought.

[mrswongtuition]

markfch:

mrswongtuition:

Agree. Some of them may not want to share with you what they are sending their kids to and put up a 'carefree' attitude in front of you. Behind you, they are madly surfing KSP to dig more info about the schools you are sending your kids to and trying to find even better schools to send their kids.


But I know of another group who keep saying that enrichments are useless and there's no need for such rat races. In reality, they can't afford it. So they say there's no need for it

From my circle of friends, there are really parents who are doing well financially but still decided against going all out for their kids to achieve academic excellence. They say that the big fight will be at secondary level and by then, it's really up to the kids' own motivation. So their children really look happy and enjoying their childhood.

You will never know what they've been doing unless you stay with them.

I know of someone who claims that his kids never needed tuition or enrichments at all. However, I came to find out that he hired private tutors to do revision with his kids everyday and he tells the kids it's not tuition, it's just 'babysitting'. And the tutor he hires are top tutors who charge at least $50-80 per hour.

Found out by accident cos one of the tutors he hired is my ex-colleague and she asked me for a ride to his house for tuition after school (it's on my way home).

[markfch]

mrswongtuition:

You will never know what they've been doing unless you stay with them.


I know of someone who claims that his kids never needed tuition or enrichments at all. However, I came to find out that he hired private tutors to do revision with his kids everyday and he tells the kids it's not tuition, it's just 'babysitting'. And the tutor he hires are top tutors who charge at least $50-80 per hour.

Your anecdote reminds me of another story. I was taking leave to do PV work once in a while. My ex-boss then told me to take it easy. Nowadays kids have too much stress already. Pri sch is for play play only. I casually asked him which pri sch his kids attended (they're all grown up and doing well now)? Based on his theory, I half expected a neighbourhood sch name to pop up. Then he mentioned first kid RGPS, second kid (boy) Nan Hua.

Walau. Did you hear the sound of palm smacking forehead :roll: ? Since he was my boss, couldn't smack his forehead so have to smack mine instead. Next time he tells me a car is only a transport from pt A to pt B, I better check whether it's a Jag or not.

But I still believe that there are parents who don't subscribe to the rat race, at least for kids at an early age. Cos even if you win, you're still a rat . I would really like to hear from this group how they cope with peers pressure.