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    In-law problems?

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    • H Offline
      hapydino
      last edited by

      janet_lee88:
      hapydino,

      Exactly like those TVB dramas of olden days hor...those fierce, overbearing, unreasonable MIL in the show bullying the new daughter-in-law.

      I envy those ladies who have great MILs whom they can rely on, help look after kids and don't side the sons all the time.
      janet,

      ya lor, i guess good in laws are 可遇不可求..

      :celebrate:

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • H Offline
        hapydino
        last edited by

        Mrs Ang:
        hapydino:


        and when it comes to the issue of getting played out when it comes to babysitting our DD, both mums pulled the same stunt.. :stupid:

        My mil also played me out not once but twice :stupid: . My ger has been having fever, running nose and cough at least once a month since she is in infant care. Therefore mil has offered her help again last week and my hubby still have 70% faith in her :!: I have decided to remain in infant care. I cannot imagine what will I do if mil do it the 3rd time! :x

        Mrs Ang,

        for my case, when we were deciding where to stay / where to buy our flat, mil say she wouldn't be able to help.. so we chose a place near my parents (5 bus stops away) when my mum say she can help..

        mil stay in the west while my parents stay in the NE..

        move in liao, mil keep bugging us to have a baby.. her version 'u all stay so far, i wanna help oso cannot help'.. 😐

        den move in liao my mum's turn to flip roti prata and say she prefer to continue working so cannot help too!! :stupid:

        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
        • M Offline
          Mrs Ang
          last edited by

          hapydino:

          Mrs Ang,

          for my case, when we were deciding where to stay / where to buy our flat, mil say she wouldn't be able to help.. so we chose a place near my parents (5 bus stops away) when my mum say she can help..

          mil stay in the west while my parents stay in the NE..

          move in liao, mil keep bugging us to have a baby.. her version 'u all stay so far, i wanna help oso cannot help'.. 😐

          den move in liao my mum's turn to flip roti prata and say she prefer to continue working so cannot help too!! :stupid:
          Aiyo...my case is we buy near our mil flat as mil said will help. I'm working in Tuas and mil stay in East. My parent stay in NW. My mum has agreed to help as my ger has been falling sick constantly. I'm now trying to appeal for early selling of my house. Hope it will be approved asap. Then I will need to look for a resale flat in NW.

          How old is your child and who is helping you to look after?

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • janet88J Offline
            janet88
            last edited by

            I wouldn't dare think of getting hubby's side to look after my kids. SIL in US pregnant, so better for the old folks to fly there to help her...stay there indefinite lagi best....after all in S'pore so free.

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            • B Offline
              buds
              last edited by

              janet_lee88:
              SIL in US pregnant, so better for the old folks to fly there to help her...stay there indefinite lagi best....after all in S'pore so free.

              :rotflmao:

              :hugs: to janet_lee88..

              Does your hubby understand how you feel abt his parents?
              It's always nice to know of hubbies who bother or who care
              about how to also find it in their heart to sometimes think abt
              their spouses instead of just their mothers all the time. After
              all, after marriage the spouses & children ARE the immediate
              family already.. ain't it... 😞

              It's not abt right and wrong, but abt at least trying to be fair
              & not make the spouses always the one being shortchanged.

              I mean living with some ILs are just something really hard to pull
              together and survive and let live... doesn't that count for something..
              that the spouses DO care to try make things work and try to make
              living together a harmonious idea? Sometimes i find that sacrifices
              can so blatantly go un-noticed and not to mention unappreciated.

              Abt 2 weeks ago, i watched the Ch 5 tongue in cheek newsy show..
              The Noose. Michelle Chong said, the main reason for divorces is the
              Mother In Laws. I laughed heartily at her next few drunk-driven words
              during the interview when she said, her MIL was :siao:... expected her
              to make porridge for the whole family at 5am in the morning... all this
              due to the fact that her MIL had been watching too many of those Korean
              dramas where the DILs are expected to bow down and be ultra dutiful
              to husbands and mother in laws. The best end to that was when Michelle
              said, my MIL even calls me Kim. :siao: arh! Buey tahan. :lol: Made my day.

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • H Offline
                hapydino
                last edited by

                Mrs Ang:
                hapydino:


                Mrs Ang,

                for my case, when we were deciding where to stay / where to buy our flat, mil say she wouldn't be able to help.. so we chose a place near my parents (5 bus stops away) when my mum say she can help..

                mil stay in the west while my parents stay in the NE..

                move in liao, mil keep bugging us to have a baby.. her version 'u all stay so far, i wanna help oso cannot help'.. 😐

                den move in liao my mum's turn to flip roti prata and say she prefer to continue working so cannot help too!! :stupid:

                Aiyo...my case is we buy near our mil flat as mil said will help. I'm working in Tuas and mil stay in East. My parent stay in NW. My mum has agreed to help as my ger has been falling sick constantly. I'm now trying to appeal for early selling of my house. Hope it will be approved asap. Then I will need to look for a resale flat in NW.

                How old is your child and who is helping you to look after?

                Mrs Ang,

                🙏 Hope your appeal goes thru soon else v hectic arrangement for u too to rush from E to W for work den back home to E..

                My daughter is 3yr+ and she's in the care of a baby sitter whom has been caring for her since 10 weeks old.. 🙂 this baby sitter is a total stranger and I remembered I cried when I left my gal there for the 1st time.. Heart so pain!! Lucky she's a decent old lady whom takes great care of my gal, so my gal 'earned' another pair of grandparents whom she calls Ah Mah and Gong Gong.. 🙂

                baby sitter's son and DIL stays with her and my gal calls them W Mummy and Daddy too.. there's 2 grandsons (Sec School) living under the same roof so my daughter is like the 小姐 there.. :celebrate:

                all thanks to God's blessings we found this baby sitter.. 🙂

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • M Offline
                  minnie2004
                  last edited by

                  buds:
                  Abt 2 weeks ago, i watched the Ch 5 tongue in cheek newsy show..The Noose. Michelle Chong said, the main reason for divorces is the Mother In Laws. I laughed heartily at her next few drunk-driven words during the interview when she said, her MIL was :siao:... expected her to make porridge for the whole family at 5am in the morning... all this

                  due to the fact that her MIL had been watching too many of those Korean
                  dramas where the DILs are expected to bow down and be ultra dutiful
                  to husbands and mother in laws. The best end to that was when Michelle
                  said, my MIL even calls me Kim. :siao: arh! Buey tahan. :lol: Made my day.
                  :rotflmao:
                  This deep-rooted asian culture/mindset that the wife is inferior to the husband and has to serve the husband has got to change. Sometimes I wonder it'll be better to marry an angmoh. Some of my friends who are married to angmohs, their MILs really treat them like their own daughters! There're no complaints of MIL problems. I think that's b/c the sons are usually more independent (most leave home at 18 ) and the mothers tend not to be as protective of their sons as their Asian counterparts.

                  1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                  • M Offline
                    Mrs Ang
                    last edited by

                    hapydino,


                    Thanks.

                    I couldn’t find a reliable baby sitter thus has put my baby ger in infant care. My PIL have not travelled to Tuas before so they never understand it is so far away.

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • B Offline
                      buds
                      last edited by

                      hapydino:
                      My daughter is 3yr+ and she's in the care of a baby sitter whom has been caring for her since 10 weeks old.. 🙂 this baby sitter is a total stranger and I remembered I cried when I left my gal there for the 1st time.. Heart so pain!! Lucky she's a decent old lady whom takes great care of my gal, so my gal 'earned' another pair of grandparents whom she calls Ah Mah and Gong Gong.. 🙂


                      baby sitter's son and DIL stays with her and my gal calls them W Mummy and Daddy too.. there's 2 grandsons (Sec School) living under the same roof so my daughter is like the 小姐 there.. :celebrate:

                      all thanks to God's blessings we found this baby sitter.. 🙂
                      Hi hapydino.. 😄 You sure found yourself a helluva good catch of a
                      babysitter! I love the part when you said your girl earned herself
                      another pair of grandparents! 😉 Sounds like close knitted &
                      family loving people.

                      Lucky you. :love:

                      Any mother in your shoes wud've teared all the way to work leaving
                      behind a 10wk old baby with a total stranger! :hugs: Well.. a mom's
                      gotta do what a mom's gotta do, right? 😉

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • H Offline
                        hapydino
                        last edited by

                        Mrs Ang:
                        hapydino,


                        Thanks.

                        I couldn't find a reliable baby sitter thus has put my baby ger in infant care. My PIL have not travelled to Tuas before so they never understand it is so far away.
                        Mrs Ang,

                        later on will it be a challenge to visit your parents-in-law when u move to the west? given that i gather they may find it too out of the way to drop by your place for visit??

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