In-law problems?

[buds]

Sun_2010:

buds I sincerely hope that things go ur way.


The price of being good...
Sometimes its time to put ur foot down - it can be very emotinally draining to live with someone under the same roof when the relationship is very strained.

It wouldn't have been so bad had hubs been more ti liang of my state..
but i also cannot blame him entirely because he never got to see the
side of his mom that i unfortunately saw.

She's almost a different person when in his presence.

Yes, it has been emotionally draining me of my youth really and for the
life of me, i honestly cannot withstand more strain that i already have
gone through. I might just hafta throw in the towel as a last resort.
It will really sadden me if it came to that... despite his shortcomings
he has many commendable traits. You guys have known me long enuf
here... have i ever really a bad thing to say about him?

I hated it each time hubs personally attacks my character and each time
he fumes up into an argument cause he cannot believe what is coming
from my mouth when something nasty happens in the house.. to a point
i even gave up telling, so i kept everything to myself... till today. Even
the day of our move was horrible. But i endured her black face cos i
prayed that was the last time i will see of it.

Sun_2010:

Guess u r really down. so far the posts i have read of urs are all oozing with enthusiam , give really useful advice, a pat o someones back...

So here is something to cheer u up , laugh even if u heard it b4

God couldnt be everywhere so he made mothers. :love:
Devil couldnt be everywhere so he made MILs

I have been really really down... with baby scares and trouble and with
non-affirmative living arrangements for ILs... with BIL trying to wiggle
his way out of asserting some responsibilities as another son; always
saying he wants to prevent any misunderstandings and unnecessary
friction between his wife and his parents and all that crap... i have
just been keeping to myself as not to stress hubs further than he
already is.

Btw, i love the cheer-up gesture. :celebrate:

Hilarious! :rotflmao:

[buds]

hapydino:

Buds, ur MIL oso v cartoon.. dun wan to stay and cannot imagine staying with the other SIL and yet made hell for u?!?!

I cannot believe it either when she said it to my face... :whut:
The crappy part is she would make it a point to please BIL and SIL
when we visit them (go over their plc) or when they come over to visit
us. I suppose since she hardly gets to see the children from BIL/SIL..
she makes extra effort to pretend. My SIL knows and cannot be bothered.

hapydino:

she herself must have known she 吃定 you already..

i got this nagging feeling that your HB might give in.. yes, it will be YOUR home and his home (but the IL coming along).. i hope i am wrong!!

I hope i'm wrong too... but like you i have the same naggin & biting
feeling these past few weeks already. Aniwaes, I'm still keeping my
fingers crossed till the eventual crunch time.

hapydino:

cuz doesn't make sense to go thru all the trouble of selling, house searching, moving out to bring along both IL.. esp with the new baby, where got space!!

Yes. A real waste of time.

[tree nymph]

Buds,

you are really caught!

do you think things may change (even if you are staying together again, but this time, its YOUR HOUSE) if buds hub put his feet down and talk to his parents that YOU and ONLY YOU ARE THE MISTRESS OF THE HOUSE and YOU WILL HAVE THE FINAL SAY in EVERY THING AND ANY THING?

I think you also need to sit buds hub down and talk to him about this. like you say, damn if you are and damn if you are not… so why not charge at the problem, and make buds hub see your pointS and get his parents to sit down with him and you too that YOU ARE NOW IN CHARGE? that your PIL ARE NOT TO RUIN YOUR LIFE if they were to stay with you again?

[hapydino]

Buds,


reading your post…

u have moved into ur own house already?? cuz u mention tat is the last time u will see her black face…

if who, where are the IL staying now??

can use the excuse where reno fully done for 3 kids… no extra room / space for them??

[buds]

If hubs has not dared to say i was right even when i blatantly was for the

past ten years... it is very unlikely that he would even mouth those words
to dictate to his parents... especially his mom! Even if it IS OUR HOUSE now.

You are right. I'm definitely caught. And so is hubs.

BIL & SIL have been having the time of their lives and i am very sure they
prefer to keep it that way. Un-intruded... peaceful... and their own personal
space where they can be themselves. BIL even went to the extent to
say that it would inconvenience him having them around... He's talking
about his own parents you know? So, I'm the only bad one? :roll:

[hapydino]

Buds,


pardon me if i am wrong… i think i read past posts that such logistics have been sorted out when u decided to bite the bullet and sell off the current house?? and it has been made known the IL are not coming along to the new place??

[buds]

hapydino:

Buds, reading your post.. u have moved into ur own house already?? cuz u mention tat is the last time u will see her black face.. if who, where are the IL staying now??

Yes, we have... though there still are things to be done. Some works
incomplete but it's fine. Good thing is we're outta there. The last time
i had to endure her black face was when the movers were doing their job.

That's another story... sigh... :roll: Reali sianz.

hapydino:

can use the excuse where reno fully done for 3 kids.. no extra room / space for them??

I'm halfway through decorating & arranging my classroom. :please:

Already have parents reserving places for lessons.

FIL told my DD2 that he doesn't mind not having a room. :whut:

[hapydino]

FIL of cuz dun mind… MIL would jump at the chance to be let thru the main door… prob is Buds would mind… a lot!!


gosh i sound so mean…

[buds]

hapydino:

Buds, pardon me if i am wrong.. i think i read past posts that such logistics have been sorted out when u decided to bite the bullet and sell off the current house?? and it has been made known the IL are not coming along to the new place??

Yes. That was what was pre-arranged... promised... and yet again unfulfilled
not surprisingly. It HAS been made known that they are to stay on their own
and in the presence of MY parents and siblings.

So far, in the history of the last 10yrs... promises to them are meant
to be broken.

[buds]

hapydino:

FIL of cuz dun mind.. MIL would jump at the chance to be let thru the main door.. prob is Buds would mind.. a lot!!


gosh i sound so mean..

No you're not mean.. cause i DO mind a lot!

I honestly cannot see anymore good from my ILs anymore.
They've crossed the line already.