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    Club 3 or more Kids

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    • P Offline
      petitemama
      last edited by

      Hi all,


      I’m SAHM for 3yrs now
      Was FTWM when I had 2 children. Now 4, no maid

      dd - 11yrs
      ds - 8yrs
      dd - 2yrs
      dd - 8mth

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      • MMMM Offline
        MMM
        last edited by

        24hr-mum:
        hi parents


        with 3 or more kids, how do u budget expenses for tuition?
        i m sure cant tuition all subjects for all kids, unless super rich.
        even if got $, time coordination is a problem, n plus the multiple trips.

        how do u decide who gets what tuition?
        Actually it depends on individual's situation. In the case of FTWM, I feel that my resource is limited so I've to outsource the tuition portion to external parties. My dedication to the kids is to arrive home by latest 8pm so that we can start our daily 2 hours revision/ homework time. Given the no. of kids, I cannot afford to coach them myself as it will be a situation where all will be neglected and I will be frustrated.

        We try to schedule tuition on weekdays and some unavoidable ones to weekends so our weekends are effectively burnt. That explains why I am enjoying every moment of school hols.... OMG 3 more weeks :!:

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        • porcupine12tradeP Offline
          porcupine12trade
          last edited by

          phankao:
          tigger88:

          24hr-mum, I love kids and it's always my dream to have 4 kids. Financially will be tough to raise 4 kids so that's why we (me and hubby) are still considering.


          Actually I find kids to be so troublesome. 3 was still manageable. But truthfully, 4 is just too much, tipping the scale of can tolerate to hate.

          oops i share the same tot about \"kids are so troublesome\". I salute mummies who have >3 kids because 3 is already very noisy!! is your 4th planned?

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          • porcupine12tradeP Offline
            porcupine12trade
            last edited by

            MMM:
            24hr-mum:

            hi parents


            with 3 or more kids, how do u budget expenses for tuition?
            i m sure cant tuition all subjects for all kids, unless super rich.
            even if got $, time coordination is a problem, n plus the multiple trips.

            how do u decide who gets what tuition?

            Actually it depends on individual's situation. In the case of FTWM, I feel that my resource is limited so I've to outsource the tuition portion to external parties. My dedication to the kids is to arrive home by latest 8pm so that we can start our daily 2 hours revision/ homework time. Given the no. of kids, I cannot afford to coach them myself as it will be a situation where all will be neglected and I will be frustrated.

            We try to schedule tuition on weekdays and some unavoidable ones to weekends so our weekends are effectively burnt. That explains why I am enjoying every moment of school hols.... OMG 3 more weeks :!:

            for me, #1 is the guinea pig. whatever i send her, if it works, i'll send #2 too (#3 only turning 4 nx yr so have not started external classes). n usually #2 goes classes \"ealier\" (younger) then #1.

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            • MMMM Offline
              MMM
              last edited by

              porcupine12trade:


              for me, #1 is the guinea pig. whatever i send her, if it works, i'll send #2 too (#3 only turning 4 nx yr so have not started external classes). n usually #2 goes classes \"ealier\" (younger) then #1.
              Same in my case. So #2 ended up attending enrichment classes earlier than #1. I was take it easy mum so my #1 started enrichment when she was in K2. The academic ones. She did alot of non academic ones eg. speech & drama, music,etc.... when she was much younger.

              But with 2 kids in primary school, I used the experience I had with #1 and #2 and apply that to #3. So she started most of the enrichment classes at either Nursery/ K1. She will be K2 next year. Compared to her siblings, she has gained literacy skills at a earlier age. So I always say that she is cleverer than both of them and my #1 would be like.... why ddn't you expose me earlier etc.... Unfortunately, I struggle to spend time with her. Sometimes I would ask the older kids to read with her/ teach her how to play a song she learnt, etc... but sometimes they are not so cooperative.

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              • 2 Offline
                24hr-mum
                last edited by

                hi petitemama


                admire how u cope without maid (and grandparents also i believe), esp when ur #3 and #4 so young.
                is #4 it planned?

                my #3 is 3yo, dont dare to consider #4 yet

                #1 no academic enrichment except mpm for a little while at k2
                now she tution for all 3 subject + piano.

                #2 only started math now at k2. still wondering to send him for eng or not cos he very lazy to do wk at hm. had jelic before at 4. he had a lot of therapy type of session at brainfit. so no time for academic course until now

                #3 only jelic n music.

                MMM - how did u manage to have TWO hrs of wk time at home?
                i can only squeeze in 1 hr after the two youngers come home frm childcare n after dinner n 30min tv time. usu wkg from is 730pm - 930pm but sometimes 8pm - 9pm.
                i myself find 2hrs long for myself

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                • MMMM Offline
                  MMM
                  last edited by

                  24hr-mum:
                  MMM - how did u manage to have TWO hrs of wk time at home?

                  i can only squeeze in 1 hr after the two youngers come home frm childcare n after dinner n 30min tv time. usu wkg from is 730pm - 930pm but sometimes 8pm - 9pm.
                  i myself find 2hrs long for myself
                  I think it's all \"determination\" 😉 I was still take it easy when my #1 was P1. At that point my #2 was K2. Both #2 and #3 are my weekend kids and they stay at my mum's place. #1 is with us as she is in primary school. I struggled badly..... #2 literacy skill sucks.... I gave him spelling/ tingxie until I nearly vomitted blood. It was suboptimisation. #1 was ok. Results manageable but not fantastic.

                  When both of them go to primary school 2 years ago, I made a resolution that we cannot continue like this. We need to ensure that we spend 2 hours with them every evening be it for homework, revision, etc... It was difficult initially. This meant not havng leisure dinner with my hubby after work, not going for shopping, not watching tv, etc.... But 2 years down the road, I think we made it. During school days, we really make it an attempt to be home by latest 8pm and they must start their work by then.

                  I am lucky that I've a job that allows the flexibility. Sometimes when they are doing their work, I am doing mine too but in the same room so that our presence are felt. I also try to postpone business travels till school hols. So I really enjoy school holidays where we need not worry about rushing home after work to be there with them. We can go to some malls for dinner after walk and shop around.... So my hols is gone in 3 weeks time 😢

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                  • 2 Offline
                    24hr-mum
                    last edited by

                    hi MMM


                    wont ur kids complain no tv time?

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                    • M Offline
                      MummyThreeStreams
                      last edited by

                      Thank you all the mums for sharing your stories. We can learn so much from each other and get mutual encouragement. I’ll be taking no pay leave when #3 arrives to resume a SAHM life. There are many reasons, and one was the thought that there are only 24 hrs in a day and you have to squeeze in so much with 3 kids. I know I’ll be most grumpy if I have to put myself through the stress of juggling work and family. I was happiest when i was a SAHM.


                      24hr-mum talked about TV. With my first one, i used to use the TV as a babysitter so that i could get my chores done while he was entertained. But now that i have two, i realise they entertain themselves so they don’t watch tv at all. I’m hoping that this will continue when #3 arrives.

                      I wanted to ask if you find that your kids are able to play among themselves so that it frees pockets of time up for you to take a breather or do your chores?

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                      • 2 Offline
                        24hr-mum
                        last edited by

                        aiyo, its when my kids play among themselves that i m NOT free, becos they always end up fighting or quarreling n i hv to be around to see that no bruises, scratches or biting occurs! my #3 is 3yo but most fierce among the 3.


                        only tv time is most peaceful …but then my 3yo likes to stand up n down the sofa, also scary…

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