In-law problems?

[MummyThreeStreams]

Off topic…but actually, I think i have more problems with my Dad than with the in laws…my in-laws are no saints but would rather live with my in-laws than with my Dad!!

[24hr-mum]

its basically generation gap. the salt era vs our no-salt era

i nvr believe extended families will work…quite difficult even for 3 kids to get along well in the same family

i told my kids, if u dont want to share, go find another mummy n daddy n u be the only child ok?

[janet88]

I cannot imagine staying together with them, not even for a day. No thanks. It’s worse having to stay with his other siblings and their spouses. This will never work out bcos 同住难. We all have our own ways of doing things and I’m particular about hygiene.

[MummyThreeStreams]

janet_lee88:

I cannot imagine staying together with them, not even for a day. No thanks. It's worse having to stay with his other siblings and their spouses. This will never work out bcos 同住难. We all have our own ways of doing things and I'm particular about hygiene.

Haha! On the point about hygiene, it's so hard to get DS1 to go to the toilet in my in-law's place because he complains the toilet is dirty (wet toilet, and they don't use the toilet flush, they use rain/laundry water, so there's always a smell...)!

[24hr-mum]

rain water? wont hv mosquito breeding?

[Andaiz]

janet_lee88:

I cannot imagine staying together with them, not even for a day. No thanks... This will never work out bcos 同住难. We all have our own ways of doing things and I'm particular about hygiene.

janet_lee88 - fully agree. and it is not just hygiene, it is also the way they look after the children and how MIL pits one child against the other! :!: and she's the one (ironically) trying to tbe fair to both SIL and myself and often I find that she doesn't dare to \"give her colours\" coz SIL is spoilt.

But guess who's at the receiving end of it all of her \"unfairness\"? Me and my girls. The kids are increasingly distancing themselves from her coz she's so two-faced. But I feel sad coz I know the time that they grow old enough not to be able to take care of themselves, BIL and SIL would :siam:

[24hr-mum]

if ur mil doesnt like u, its ‘good’ as in she wont demand u to do this n that for her (hopefully). mine used to expect me to do this n that eg go doctor, dentist, buy shoes… cos she stayed wif me…n i wld hv to drag the kids along…

[new_mummy]

stayed with them during confinement (just one freaky month!) and it totally tarnish whatever good impression i had on them before the baby was born.


so far, i haven’t heard any good MILs so far, at least in my circle of friends.

rather sad isn’t it?

[janet88]

Andaiz:

janet_lee88:

I cannot imagine staying together with them, not even for a day. No thanks... This will never work out bcos 同住难. We all have our own ways of doing things and I'm particular about hygiene.

janet_lee88 - fully agree. and it is not just hygiene, it is also the way they look after the children and how MIL pits one child against the other! :!:

But guess who's at the receiving end of it all of her \"unfairness\"? Me and my girls. The kids are increasingly distancing themselves from her coz she's so two-faced. But I feel sad coz I know the time that they grow old enough not to be able to take care of themselves, BIL and SIL would :siam:

Yes...the way she looks at the kids like as though she is going to swallow them...somehow I cannot seem to detect any tenderness. Kids know and can feel who is genuine...of course the bigger ones will know.

She is scared of SIL bcos SIL will tell her off in the face...I don't need her to be scared of me, just stay arms length will do...no need to honey honey.

[MummyThreeStreams]

janet_lee88:

She is scared of SIL bcos SIL will tell her off in the face...I don't need her to be scared of me, just stay arms length will do...no need to honey honey.

My FIL and MIL think DH is scared of me! DH thinks that it is very funny!
They are OK in front of me. Not sure if it's because they are scared of me, I am sometimes quite upfront about what I don't like.

But I know behind my back they tell all their friends and relatives what a nazi I am with the kids. Like many of you, DH and I really watch what our kids eat. FIL and MIL tell them my kids are in a very sorry state and whenever I meet DH's relatives over Chinese New Year etc., the relatives will always make some comments about it.

I don't mind, except that they all think that I am the only one who came up with the food rules! Hello! DH is also very strict about their food! Sometimes even more strict!