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    In-law problems?

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    • janet88J Offline
      janet88
      last edited by

      If these MIL continue to give the maids a hard time, there will be chances of 1) maid running away/want a transfer 2) kill the MIL. Not surprising since this has happened.

      Yes, I know these maids need to be supervised and monitored or they will be up to monkey tricks but pull a string too tight will lead to tragedy.

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      • T Offline
        tracytmks
        last edited by

        my mil i say her abit face black behind my back complain to hubby. scold my gal she oso complain worst behind my back somemore. hubby always side her. i says his mum wat wat wat he always give lamn excuses. hubby complain say his sis come i gave black face. whr got i came hm saw SIL come smile to my gal just nvr greet her cause i know she hates me. i just go rm put my bag n change clothes i come out she go homes so many times liao i just hack care. nw he blames me for dis outside stray i cries til eyes swollen. cant tell my family as i doesnt wan to stir up yet currently no concrete proof. i scold my kids mil give black face not happy. but she can pass remarks says later mummy scold kids dont listen to her i m kind so raise my voice onthe kids she not happy wat she wan???

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        • C Offline
          CuriousDaddy
          last edited by

          I do find it helpful with my in law staying with me. She’s a great help and also help to oversee our helper is taking care of my boy…

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          • C Offline
            CuriousDaddy
            last edited by

            and best is i do get to enjoy home cook food with her around...


            me & wife busy with work, so really enjoy blessed to have her cooking for us... :celebrate:

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            • B Offline
              BeContented
              last edited by

              Hi CuriousDaddy,

              that's because generally, MIL's expectation of Son-IL is very different from DIL.
              Generally most mothers will 心痛 /feel for own daughter and willingly help to relief the daughter of some chores. On the other hand, tradtional mothers who have been doing EVERYTHING for the son expects the DIL to come home and still do the chores and take care (short of using the word 'serve') of their son. They see the domestic chores and kids as the JOB of the woman whether they work or not.

              My DH knew that & he willingly mops the floor and do some chores so that I do not get :rant: by MIL. But of course, MIL not too happy but won't say much if the son is firm enough.

              You are lucky that the MIL helps. Some may not.....

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              • janet88J Offline
                janet88
                last edited by

                cwc:
                Hi CuriousDaddy,

                that's because generally, MIL's expectation of Son-IL is very different from DIL.
                Generally most mothers will 心痛 /feel for own daughter and willingly help to relief the daughter of some chores. On the other hand, tradtional mothers who have been doing EVERYTHING for the son expects the DIL to come home and still do the chores and take care (short of using the word 'serve') of their son. They see the domestic chores and kids as the JOB of the woman whether they work or not.

                My DH knew that & he willingly mops the floor and do some chores so that I do not get :rant: by MIL. But of course, MIL not too happy but won't say much if the son is firm enough.
                True, well-said :celebrate:
                My mum treats my hubby like her son.
                MILs however, want their daughters-in-law to work so that their precious sons won't be so 辛苦 supporting family by himself. After work, still do chores and attend to kids and preferably serve the husband as well. Oh yes, don't think of getting maid bcos they will say they didn't have maids back then.

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                • M Offline
                  Mrs Ang
                  last edited by

                  janet_lee88:
                  True, well-said :celebrate:

                  My mum treats my hubby like her son.
                  MILs however, want their daughters-in-law to work so that their precious sons won't be so 辛苦 supporting family by himself. After work, still do chores and attend to kids and preferably serve the husband as well. Oh yes, don't think of getting maid bcos they will say they didn't have maids back then.
                  But they didn't have so much work stresses back then too!

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                  • B Offline
                    BeContented
                    last edited by

                    Curious.....anyone has problem with FIL?


                    Hubby is telling me that I need to learn to handle. But I find it very unfair. :mad: :rant:
                    FIL has dementia and I think he has slowly reached the next stage. Recently, he has been displaying inappropriate behaviour such as walking out of toilet with pants down and playing with his stuff. I read up and these are some of the symptoms with dementia patients.......
                    While my DD has yet to witness any (and I dun want to subject my kids to it), I personally am VERY upset despite all the reading 😢 & the maid is a little too. No doubt the maid has been pre-empt and told about his condition and the job requirement is to take care of FIL, think it's still quite upsetting for any woman, isn't it?

                    Anyone has experience? How do you deal with it? How do we train the maid?
                    Personally, I feel like sending FIL to nursing home, I can't deal with it......

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                    • JenniferJ Offline
                      Jennifer
                      last edited by

                      cwc:
                      Curious.....anyone has problem with FIL?


                      Hubby is telling me that I need to learn to handle. But I find it very unfair. :mad: :rant:
                      FIL has dementia and I think he has slowly reached the next stage. Recently, he has been displaying inappropriate behaviour such as walking out of toilet with pants down and playing with his stuff. I read up and these are some of the symptoms with dementia patients.......
                      While my DD has yet to witness any (and I dun want to subject my kids to it), I personally am VERY upset despite all the reading 😢 & the maid is a little too. No doubt the maid has been pre-empt and told about his condition and the job requirement is to take care of FIL, think it's still quite upsetting for any woman, isn't it?

                      Anyone has experience? How do you deal with it? How do we train the maid?
                      Personally, I feel like sending FIL to nursing home, I can't deal with it......
                      This is so like the TCS drama with Chen Liping n Zhu HouRen. I wld insist the old man to be sent to a nursing home. Really too much to handle liao. I wld also fear for the safety of everyone at home. Who knows if the old man wld play with fire n burn down the hse or do sth else dangerous. Please continue to reason with your hubby.

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • P Offline
                        poppy15
                        last edited by

                        cwc:
                        FIL has dementia and I think he has slowly reached the next stage.

                        has he display any child-like signs? if yes, then maybe can trick him by saying cannot take \"that\" out else will be bitten by mozzies, etc

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