Is it too much?

[smartmummy]

LOLMum:

dd exceeded 700 as well twice in fact.


though we know the hp is very very important to kids, there must be a line drawn somewhere.

she is a teenager and i strongly believe we need to limit her use to teach her to use her limited usage in a smart way and to control her addictive usage iif it is unlimited sms.

it is so silly to waste a sms with text like \"ok\",\"nite nite\" etc. for example, everytime dd goes for tuition, she has to text me once she reaches the classroom. but she will sms messages like \"going up the escalator now\", \"about to enter class\", or something that is irrelavant.

now she will just call me on my cell phone, let it ring once and hang up. by this i know she is in class. it actually saves her about more than 30 sms per month with me. now she is learning to see if a reply is necessary before blindly smsing her friends.

if i text someone and it doesnt need a reply, i will always add \"no need to reply to text\" at the end.

your parents are doing it right. i certainly dont think they are unreasonable. you should take a good look at all the smses you have sent out and ask yourself do you really need to send them?

also pls dont compare with others, there are many others out there who have lower usage. as you said, your friends exceeded 1k sms and results are better than yours, so are you saying if your sms exceed 1k, your results will be better than theirs? :?

thanks for the good tips.These tips I can use when my kids reach teen.

[smartmummy]

Hi snowman.697!

Please always compare with lower than u.Then u feel better.A man worry about he doesn’t has shoes until he sees a man without leg.So happy with what u have.Most important think learn to save money at young its help in ur future life.
Some people educated earn a good money but they suffer by debt.Think.

[vicki]

Get watsapp??

[meiah]

My ds? Less than 100. He has the 500 sms data plan. Then again, he does not sms so many simply cos he doesn’t bother to reply! Sometimes he won’t even reply to mine!


As for yours, if u break 701 down to per day, I suppose it’s about 23 a day. Not that bad I think.

[snowman.022851697]

vicki:

Get watsapp??

Thanks for all the replies , much appreciated! no I can't get whatsapp, firstly I am using a crap nokia, secondly I'm not on any data plan neither do I have mobile broadband. Personally if I don't want a rely I just add \"no need to reply\" at the end. And about 1/6 of these messages is for sgbeat (update Facebook and twitter via SMS) so if u look at it it's not much at all. Some others are when my fellow bus enthusiasts message me about something rare or vice versa. I've already tried to reduce my messages in fact a year ago I had 1000+. I know my dad means good but is there a need to confiscate my phone if I message even less than others -_- obviously it might seem a lot to him but keep in mind that he is 43 years old and I am 13. When they were young they didn't have mobile phones. Now that they own mobile phones as working adults do they actually \"chat\" with their friends via SMS? Our parents and us use messaging for a different purpose. We use it to chat (and gossip albeit that's not really the case for me) mostly but they talk about work related issues and maybe send messages to their children. So obviously to us 700 is not much but to them it may seem like a lot

[MummyThreeStreams]

First things first - your Dad is paying for your plan. The use of a mobile phone is a privilege and not a right. It doesn’t matter if your usage is not as much compared to your friends’. Each family operates differently. Your Dad expects you to keep below a certain number of messages in return for allowing you to use the phone. Respect that.


And I agree with smartmummy, why compare with those who have more than you? You will then always be miserable and discontented. Think about those who have to do without. Those who may not even have a mobile phone. Just because your Dad can afford you the use of the phone doesn’t mean you should use it as you please.

I know it may seem unfair…my parents used to ban me from using the phone (in the pre-internet and pre-mobile phone days this was the equivalent to a death sentence). But now I know they were teaching me an important lesson about discipline and accountability.

Hope you get my drift.

[Jennifer]

snowman.697:

And about 1/6 of these messages is for sgbeat (update Facebook and twitter via SMS) so if u look at it it's not much at all. Some others are when my fellow bus enthusiasts message me about something rare or vice versa. I've already tried to reduce my messages in fact a year ago I had 1000+. I know my dad means good but is there a need to confiscate my phone if I message even less than others -_- obviously it might seem a lot to him but keep in mind that he is 43 years old and I am 13.

I see no need to confiscate the child's mobile phone and in the process, cause inconvenience to the child as some teachers also use SMS to pass on msgs to the students.

If u hv bn able to cut down from 1000+ to 700+, I think I wld appreciate your efforts.

Maybe instead of aiming to reduce the no. of SMS, consider if the updates to sgbeat/FB/Twitter really necessary via SMS, can the updates wait till u get home to do it on a computer? Like what other ksp parents hv advised, keep non-urgent SMS to a minimum. Just my 2cts worth.

[Nebbermind]

MY child is on Whatsapp and alot of unnecessary SMS come in as they r in some grp SMS thingy, as many as 100 in one wkend afternoon. It can be a distraction for most kids. No solution in mind yet!!

[snowman.022851697]

[quote]consider if the updates to sgbeat/FB/Twitter really necessary via SMS, can the updates wait till u get home to do it on a computer? Like what other ksp parents hv advised, keep non-urgent SMS to a minimum. Just my 2cts worth.[/quote]
As a bus and train enthusiast I do like to report rare spottings as soon as possible. But recently i've cut down on my \"onboard SBSXXXXX on service XXX\" messages as they are pointless and waste my phone battery...

Mummy Three Streams > I totally agree with the first paragraph. The use of mobile phone is a privilege and not a right, and my father is the one paying the bill, but does that mean I do not have any say in any part of it? Although he's paying the bill he's paying it for ME therefore my point is that at least I could have my opinions considered without getting shot at, which is, unfortunately, not the case, because I can't even suggest anything to him. He says that because he pays for the bill he has all the rights to it. But that means that because everything I own is paid for by him does that mean I have no rights to anything? I've tried talking to him before, he said that because my XX is not good, my XX is not good, so i cannot have anything. Am i a robot or am i a human being? Okay back to the topic, the free unlimited sms is free for me as a youth and anyway with the free unlimited sms I dont see why i will suddenly start messaging twice as frequently as I used to have unlimited sms on my older number and I kept it below 1000 up till when I got a data bundle :X He didnt even allow me when i said that if I exceed the limit i would have to cover the rest of the cost myself... isn't that responsibility?Like, as in, I have the choice to message, but if I go over the limit, i pay it myself. Okay, fine, you may argue that it is better to not exceed the limit altogether. But its my choice as to whether or not i exceed, am i not wrong to say that? My parents give me pocket money and it is the choice as to how i spend the money. They cannot say that it is their money since they earnt it because if that were to be the case, then their laptop is HP's because HP made it, their TV is Samsung's because they manufactured it, their car is Toyota's because Toyota built it, etc...

I know it may seem unfair...my parents used to ban me from using the phone (in the pre-internet and pre-mobile phone days this was the equivalent to a death sentence).

I dont understand... in the pre mobile and pre -internet days, how can your parents ban you from using the phone? Unless u r talking about landlines of course

But now I know they were teaching me an important lesson about discipline and accountability.

Accountability or discipline is not taught by banning things. In fact, it doesnt teach you anything at at all, as when you have the ban lifted, you dont have any idea of how to use it properly. You just know that it is wrong. You dont know why. So ifyou cdont know why its wrong, why must you not do it. Maybe I read your sentence wrongly, I dont know. Feeling a bit light-headed at the moment...

Anyway thanks again for your opinions

[Sun_2010]

snowman.697:

Feeling a bit light-headed at the moment..

Its ok snowman - you are entitled to.
Every 13 year old feels martyred when subject to rules , lol!

Firstly I understand how much this means to you, but I emphathise with ur parents too ...

snowman.697:

But its my choice as to whether or not i exceed, am i not wrong to say that? My parents give me pocket money and it is the choice as to how i spend the money. They cannot say that it is their money since they earnt it because if that were to be the case, then their laptop is HP's because HP made it, their TV is Samsung's because they manufactured it, their car is Toyota's because Toyota built it, etc...

'You are a pretty mature boy , and that logic seems sound. Mingd you i said \"seems\" But its not . You see rights come with responsibilities...
U see we parents have some rules in very fine print in our head when we give out the rights and often we dont spell it out.
we just assume the kids will listen to us and do the right thing.

Paying for it when you exceeed your limit is not the point. Some level of austerity is necessary - believe me its not about the sms its about your attitude.
And I know - got a 13 yr old smart alec at home.
Its not easy to look from another's prespectve when you feel you have been wronged.

A case in point - My seven yr old declared he will buy an Ipad with his bank acct money when I restricted his time with the Ipad.
I just said of course he can buy his own by the time resctrictions still apply. Your Ipad doesnt mean you can use it anywhere anytime.

My advise to you , cool down . that is easy for u - u are the Snow man
Listen to your father and follow his ruling for 2 months ( i know that is an eternity)
Then approach him with a with your solution.
I am not saying things will work out after 2 months, or that what you are saying is something I would accept or not.
I just sayin that while you have your arguments in place, you have to get the right attitude and your father's' POV ,

Once you look at it with a cool head and with experience, you will behave more like an adult. Or atleast like how an adult is supposed to behave.