Club SAHM
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Hi to all SAHMs!
:salute: :salute:
:grphug:
last nite I also frustrated and came to SAHM thread and saw Janet's post.I tried to write,then my Dh arrived then I closed.
Usually his duty at home, sleep,eat,surf net. Recently another duty added.JBrisk walking(BW).Morning 2 hrs and evening two hours.
I planned to go out with him so I asked him when he wake up from his bed, \"can we go out?\".He said after I jogged.I said its getting late.He said for one hr.Then I said ok.He said u get dress up I will come.He went for 6.30 pm and came 8.30 pm.
before in the afternoon he went out.so I asked him to buy soap powder to wash cloths.He didn't buy.
I just :mad: :mad: at 8.30.I needed to wash my kids uniforms to school.
I don't know what he think of a family is. Many times I remind him a family bonding is important.
I just sick and tired for keep all this nonsence(wht he will going to do) in my mind.I know this will happen.he will come after two hrs.If I believe him a day i will get dissapoint definitely.Why he can't change??
He never think of changing himself.He has a room for rest,have food to eat,dress for wear. :imcool: no worries to taking care of kids or role model for kids. :slapshead: :slapshead:
He always sleep/lie down on the bed at home whenever at home.It is a good role model for my son to be lazy to study.He doesn't like to play with kids at home.
I need to think,plan and force him to do everything.
I always wonder does he alone or has anyone in this world?
You mummies proved to me some more people have.
When I complained him why didn't you buy?He asked me back why you didn't buy?I didn't expect is going to finish.So its my responsblity to stock everything. :slapshead: I wonder why he can't do when emergencies.I always told even I'm going to die I need to do everything.cos i was sick also he asked me to do.
He think that SAHM has more time than him.he didn't understand that what a difficult job.Especially taking care of kids whole day.If I didn't expect him we go after lunch.He can't come that time cos his nap time.
So I need to buy all and do all house work,etc,etc.So what he for???
earning money?Yes,He proudly said that.I reminded him,the kids happy with ur time not with money.He just nod the head whtever I said.Next time NO change.
Now I reminded myself doesn't expect from him anything.I just plan everything and make him to do. -
kids_r_innocent:
yes, they will before you know it but our hearts will always be with them
I can empathize with ur situation... These r the days when we hope our kids will grow up soon so that they can take care of themselves. Hang on there! N hope u r much better too! :hugs:ectanz:
Hi Janet, no difference for my case. I need to work thru 7 days, no rest day worst than a maid. I was sick last week being spread by my dd2 - stomach flu. Although sick but still need to take care of my both dds. Hb either traveling or can't handle both of them.
Imagine not feeling well, still need to coach my dd1 on her spelling test and math hm while trying to stop dd2 from crawling all over the places :frustrated:
take heart, I am sure every mother go through this phase and all
emerge OK and so will you, Cheers!! -
Hi All SAHM mummies, thanks for yr encouragement and concern. :hugs: Feeling much better now. Luckily I hv kept medicine from my previous consultation. Can't even go to consult doctor with my dd2 around cos hb not in s'pore.
Used to tell my hb that I can't afford to fall sick as nobody will be assuming my duties. In terms of dd1's education, hb is quite bochap. If asks him to coach dd1 on her study, both of them will end up watching tv and surfing Internet. As for dd2, she will start to wail the moment she with hb. Less than 5 mins, hb began to lose his temper and shouted at her. I hv to intervene and comfort dd2 in order to stop her from crying.
Hb also never lay his fingers on household chores. He keeps saying that he doesn't know how the things works or too lazy to move about. He will juz lying on bed motionlessly. He used to say that I am staying at home comfortably whereas he needs to work hard for our living. Household chores and kids should be my responsibilities. :stompfeet: -
Dh also thought I’m very free at home!
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Same here!!
When I complain big time, quickly pacify....but u can sense his REAL feelings....think I quite enjoy life. :rant: -
ectanz:
I can definitely identify with that...it happens every night when I have to hang up wet laundry. He can't even coach her for spelling :slapshead:Used to tell my hb that I can't afford to fall sick as nobody will be assuming my duties. In terms of dd1's education, hb is quite bochap. If asks him to coach dd1 on her study, both of them will end up watching tv and surfing Internet. As for dd2, she will start to wail the moment she with hb. Less than 5 mins, hb began to lose his temper and shouted at her. I hv to intervene and comfort dd2 in order to stop her from crying.
Hb also never lay his fingers on household chores. He keeps saying that he doesn't know how the things works or too lazy to move about. He will juz lying on bed motionlessly. He used to say that I am staying at home comfortably whereas he needs to work hard for our living. Household chores and kids should be my responsibilities. :stompfeet:
Last Sunday, I experienced the worst ever mood...so bad I wanted to walk out.
When we had a maid, he could afford to be lazy...but very pissed off with the maid's attitude. Now that there is no maid, he does help out with some housework like mopping and keeping/folding clothes. Where kids are concerned, I remind him that he has to do HIS PART to coach them...I cannot split myself into 2 right ? :stompfeet: -
janet_lee88:
janet, ectanz,
I can definitely identify with that...it happens every night when I have to hang up wet laundry. He can't even coach her for spelling :slapshead:ectanz:
Used to tell my hb that I can't afford to fall sick as nobody will be assuming my duties. In terms of dd1's education, hb is quite bochap. If asks him to coach dd1 on her study, both of them will end up watching tv and surfing Internet. As for dd2, she will start to wail the moment she with hb. Less than 5 mins, hb began to lose his temper and shouted at her. I hv to intervene and comfort dd2 in order to stop her from crying.
Hb also never lay his fingers on household chores. He keeps saying that he doesn't know how the things works or too lazy to move about. He will juz lying on bed motionlessly. He used to say that I am staying at home comfortably whereas he needs to work hard for our living. Household chores and kids should be my responsibilities. :stompfeet:
Last Sunday, I experienced the worst ever mood...so bad I wanted to walk out.
When we had a maid, he could afford to be lazy...but very pissed off with the maid's attitude. Now that there is no maid, he does help out with some housework like mopping and keeping/folding clothes. Where kids are concerned, I remind him that he has to do HIS PART to coach them...I cannot split myself into 2 right ? :stompfeet:
my husband expects me to clean the house and teach the kids. any stuff that he offers to help is on a 'goodwill' basis as 'unspoken' rule, he brings home the bacon, i tend the nest. the alternative is that i go out to work and i still have to tend the nest. i just
that he has lower standards (which he did adjusted downwards since his mum is a very good housekeeper 
) and cannot stand him poking around my kitchen and commenting this and that. i rather shoo him to his computer rather than he helps me and then suggest this and that. he helps out when he is in the mood or cannot tahan the mess. for teaching kids, have to get him at the correct mood and timing. my kids are rather independent if i am sick because they rather play alone/revise work alone than incur the wrath of the father.
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jedamum:
my husband expects me to clean the house and teach the kids. any stuff that he offers to help is on a 'goodwill' basis as 'unspoken' rule, he brings home the bacon, i tend the nest. the alternative is that i go out to work and i still have to tend the nest.
Wow, your dh spoils market le
I always remind my dh I did not quit my job to be a house maid. I would jump on dh if he dares to harbour similar expectations. My plan is to spend time with kids. Full stop.
Theoretically, I'm doing housework & cooking out of goodwill :evil: -
sleepy:
I love this line.jedamum:
my husband expects me to clean the house and teach the kids. any stuff that he offers to help is on a 'goodwill' basis as 'unspoken' rule, he brings home the bacon, i tend the nest. the alternative is that i go out to work and i still have to tend the nest.
Theoretically, I'm doing housework & cooking out of goodwill -
sleepy:
Will remember this line the next time I have use of it :evil:
Wow, your dh spoils market le
I always remind my dh I did not quit my job to be a house maid. I would jump on dh if he dares to harbour similar expectations. My plan is to spend time with kids. Full stop.
Theoretically, I'm doing housework & cooking out of goodwill :evil:
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