Club SAHM

[LOLMum]

as his own boss and the uncertain market situation, i would be worry too especially if i am only one bringing in the $$$.


if you work, try go maidless and look for a nanny instead. or put the younger 1 in child care and the older one at student care. more expensive but better than be a sahm and fight with dh over $$$ constantly (in case since he worries about $$$).

if really need to be a sahm, are you able to turn whatever skills you have into a home business? like baking, giving tution, or even work part-time. etc?

[Breadandmuffins]

Hi Happy to be mum

I have 4kids and a SAHM with maid to help. After I stayed home, we started to buy more insurance for DH. We did not go for holidays for the last 3yrs, we usually "holiday" in Singapore.Also hardly eat out cos quite expensive for my family size. Eat out only when there are family celebrations like MIL’s birthday.

PS: I think I "saw" you at the pri school thread. Our kids in same school. My DS is in P3 this yr.

[happy to be mum]

hi lolmum,


i also think of going maidless and put kids to childcare, or if to be a SAHM, doing some part time works, etc...still thinking so hard. my current job is very flexible, has very understanding bosses, freedom though not high income earner but still alright and managable. at times like that, really wish and envy those parents who have their parents to help out.

hi bread&muffins, i believe our boys are in the same school your Pri 3 DS is the eldest? salute you for having 4 kids!! much as i want to have a number 3, now cannot think at all!

[Canvas]

happy to be mum:

hi sleepy


you are lucky that your husband is optimistic, how i wish mine is like that!

mine is worrier as though we completely do not have any savings! the problem is he is not a drawn salary worker as he is his own boss..so i can understand his worries and concerns. But by being like that, I will also feel so stress to be a SAHM...*haiz*..why should I do??

My Dh is the same as yours, a worrier. But I attribute that to his poor childhood and that he has worked hard in his education (to get uni scholarship) and work to be in his job position today. We are not poor but we have to control bit by bit if we want to put our 2 kids through university next time.

To be honest, only 3 months as a SAHM for me so I'm still not making much progress in saving $ (too used to spending my own money for so many years) but I am getting there! Getting a shock from seeing my bank statement helped heaps! Wahahaha! :spank:

Money is important but it definitely can't buy the closeness between us and the children. And I like that there is always nutritious dinner waiting for DH when he comes home from work and DS when he comes home from school. :imanangel:

[Canvas]

sleepy:

happy to be mum:

Do your spouses worried alot about finances? I mean good responsible husbands / man will be thinking of that right?

Haha, mine doesn't. He's the over optimistic type. He feels rich 'at heart' all the time. If we look at the same figure on our bank balance, he will say 'wow! no need to worry, can shake legs' and I will say 'oh my gosh! we're so broke'.

The reality check for dh is when he found out his colleague with dual income has 5x more savings in his bank account than dh. Not to mention that colleague also owns country clubs & private properties.

But my dh is still optimistic, he attributes our low savings to single income, so not comparing like to like. Very contented la :imcool:

Such a positive DH is really nice! I mean, some SAHMs feel really stressed at not contributing financially but if the DH complains all the time about money. the SAHMs will feel worse lor. :gloomy:

[janet88]

happy to be mum:

to janet_lee88, i understand what you mean by no time to be busy with houseworks & kids but then hmm...how should i put it? we are adults still so i believe we will definitely miss adult conversations & chats. If i have a network of SAHMs staying near my place will be better cause we will understand how it feel & maybe have a support group esp if our spouses are busy earning money. Finances definitely will be a worry cause i still wish / want to maintain what we have

My kids are 7 and 11 (P1 & P5)...managed to get both in morning school. :imcool: So I get peace in the morning from 715am to 130pm.
As an adult, I definitely miss having someone to chat but it's hard to find someone with similar frequency.
When my hubby used to work from home, sometimes we will go to IMM...he does his work at Mac, while I jalan jalan. No more of those days as he has changed to another dept and has to go office everyday

[sleepy]

Canvas:

Such a positive DH is really nice! I mean, some SAHMs feel really stressed at not contributing financially but if the DH complains all the time about money. the SAHMs will feel worse lor. :gloomy:

Oh, I see what you mean. That's true, thanks for showing me the other perspective!

I guess I'm the worrier at home. Always having 危机感, feel that our savings not growing as much as I would like. Worrying not enough money to support kids to reach their full potential.

To nurture talent, everything cost money. My kids' music teachers cost $200 each. Just music lessons alone cost $400/mth for both of them.

Haven't count tuition fees yet.

[MummyThreeStreams]

I worry about money too. DH doesn’t.


But I worry not so much for our family. More for my parents. I am the eldest. My younger siblings have only worked a couple of years and are paying off their student loans, so they don’t have much to contribute. It’s left to me to help my parents with their monthly expenditure, which includes their housing loan. DH is generously helping me with all this since I don’t have a salary. I often think that it’s awful how I have to rely on DH to help take care of my parents. If I went back to work, my salary can cover all of their expenses, and I can give them even more than what they’re getting now …

But DH is very sweet. He tells me all the time not to worry. Whenever I voice these fears out about how my parents would get more money if I were working, he will ask if he should increase his contributions!!! I’m just wondering when my siblings can get their act together…then I won’t feel so bad for DH.

[BeContented]

MummyThreeStreams:

I worry about money too. DH doesn't.


But I worry not so much for our family. More for my parents. I am the eldest. My younger siblings have only worked a couple of years and are paying off their student loans, so they don't have much to contribute. It's left to me to help my parents with their monthly expenditure, which includes their housing loan. DH is generously helping me with all this since I don't have a salary. I often think that it's awful how I have to rely on DH to help take care of my parents. If I went back to work, my salary can cover all of their expenses, and I can give them even more than what they're getting now ...

But DH is very sweet. He tells me all the time not to worry. Whenever I voice these fears out about how my parents would get more money if I were working, he will ask if he should increase his contributions!!!

I understand your feeling about not giving much to parents. Same here, with a single income, dun have that much to give. Fortunately my dad is a saver/planner, so they are quite comfortable. And having realised that my mom is somewhat wasteful (SAHM all her life & totally does not take care of expenses), instead of giving her the false impression and start spending without any consideration, I cut on the monthly allowance (after I became SAHM) & save it for ad hocs events like birthday, shopping, trips etc.

[sleepy]

MummyThreeStreams:

DH is generously helping me with all this since I don't have a salary. I often think that it's awful how I have to rely on DH to help take care of my parents. If I went back to work, my salary can cover all of their expenses, and I can give them even more than what they're getting now ...


But DH is very sweet. He tells me all the time not to worry. Whenever I voice these fears out about how my parents would get more money if I were working, he will ask if he should increase his contributions!!! I'm just wondering when my siblings can get their act together...then I won't feel so bad for DH.

Wow, your dh is so sweet and generous !!!

I guess it's not second nature of son in laws to take care of their wives' parents? I have to remind my dh to run errands for my folks. For instance, driving my dad to hardware shop to buy stuff, fetching my parents from airport, etc. Need to remind him, otherwise it won't occur to him automatically. Fortunately he does it willingly when reminded


My brother is taking care of my parents financially whilst I gave my parents a token sum each month. I live near my parents so I can pop by anytime, read their letters, run errands, etc. I would like to think that I'm still contributing, my brother 出钱 I 出力 loh