Daughter wants to stop learning piano

[corneyAmber]

chamonix:

ks2me:

It is never the equipment, always the person. Lang Lang started in modest way with a cheap piano but his aspirations took him far.

He did start with a cheap piano. But I read in his http://www.amazon.com/Journey-Thousand-Miles-My-Story/dp/0385524579/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1256818507&sr=1-1 that his father was the driving force when Lang Lang was just a young child.

Yup no doubt he was because Lang Lang could not see the vision then and certainly to fulfill his parents'(both musicians) unrealised dreams. So was Mozart's and Beethovan's dads but it was not the daddies who became famous and well-known.

Nevertheless, it is still people, never equipment. No doubt they were the driving force but I don't think they forced-fit their boys to learn music, their boys had demonstrated special talent.

[watmekiasu]

ks2me:

[


Yup no doubt he was because Lang Lang could not see the vision then and certainly to fulfill his parents'(both musicians) unrealised dreams. So was Mozart's and Beethovan's dads but it was not the daddies who became famous and well-known.

Nevertheless, it is still people, never equipment. No doubt they were the driving force but I don't think they forced-fit their boys to learn music, their boys had demonstrated special talent.

No doubt Mozart and Beethovan had special talents but there were in fact forced by their dads, with huge negative consequences. Mozart's health suffered deeply as he was forced to travel all over Austria to perform, he was not close to his ambitious father and never lived up to his father's expectations. Beethovan's father was an alcoholic and physically abused him and his siblings. He was sometimes dragged out of bed to practice music till the early hours of the morning. His father wanted his son to be another Mozart. The physical abuse he suffered under the hands of his father may had been a contributing factor to his loss of hearing later in life.

[watmekiasu]

ks2me:

[


Yup no doubt he was because Lang Lang could not see the vision then and certainly to fulfill his parents'(both musicians) unrealised dreams. So was Mozart's and Beethovan's dads but it was not the daddies who became famous and well-known.

I find these words \"to fulfill his parents unrealised dream\" chlling. Apart from Mozart and Beethovan, I've personally met 2 young men whose relationship with their parent totally broke down because of this unrealised dream. One of them is my friend's husband. He despices his mother - all because he can never forgive her for years of mental and physical abuse when he was learning the piano. The other person was this young man that I met, helping out with a music prog. at the Esplanade He said he suffered through years of classical piano lessons and the day he passed his Diploma - handed the cert to his parents and told them he would never touch the piano again.

[corneyAmber]

watmekiasu:

ks2me:

[


Yup no doubt he was because Lang Lang could not see the vision then and certainly to fulfill his parents'(both musicians) unrealised dreams. So was Mozart's and Beethovan's dads but it was not the daddies who became famous and well-known.

Nevertheless, it is still people, never equipment. No doubt they were the driving force but I don't think they forced-fit their boys to learn music, their boys had demonstrated special talent.

No doubt Mozart and Beethovan had special talents but there were in fact forced by their dads, with huge negative consequences. Mozart's health suffered deeply as he was forced to travel all over Austria to perform, he was not close to his ambitious father and never lived up to his father's expectations. Beethovan's father was an alcoholic and physically abused him and his siblings. He was sometimes dragged out of bed to practice music till the early hours of the morning. His father wanted his son to be another Mozart. The physical abuse he suffered under the hands of his father may had been a contributing factor to his loss of hearing later in life.

You are probably right but the kids had talent so it was not force-fit talent, just that their methods were probably not acceptable. For apprenticeship in those days, I am sure they suffered worse, so the dads probably using apprenticeship training style. For Mozart, playing music was earning a living, his dad had to travel around earning a living and he lugged Mozart along, so it was like a not-much-of-a-choice thing. If we want to pick negative learning points, both dads left something bad for their kids. For Mozart was fear at the mention of his dad and for Beethovan was the repeated slaps which caused his loss of hearing in his 30s. Who says geniuses no need to work hard? Mozart and Beethovan had also paid the price for being so outstanding in their times.

[daisyt]

schellen:

red_ryder:

I'm in a chicken & egg situation. Some people have also told me that I need to get a proper piano to sustain interest. I bought one of those $300 Casio keyboards at home, and my daughter practices on that.

My DD has been learning piano for more than a year already. We only have a keyboard for her to practise on at home. She has not lost interest even when DH is very strict with her during practices. So I believe that sometimes, it may be the person and not the equipment.

I just with to clarify a bit for my case. As my girl was in the higher grade at that time of losing interest, so I believe equipment can be one of her reasons. She could not play out the feelings she want.

[mrswongtuition]

To someone who is naturally musically inclined with sharp eyes, a poor instrument is very frustrating. My sister did not enjoy playing the violin (because my dad nags at her all day long to practise & likes to give comments when he does not even know how to play any instrument) until my parents finally invested in a good violin.


She enjoyed it even more when she started joining an orchestra and getting to interact & indirectly compete with other kids.

Maybe your girl needs some performance outlet or find a friend to learn a duet with her It'll be more interesting

[metz]

I don’t play any musical instruments. But from my kids’ learning journey, I learnt something about them. Hence, would like to share my thoughts on it.


Indeed, it is not necessary to invest on an expensive piano, especially in the beginning. For the first few months, it’s probably alright to let the kids pound away on keyboards. However, there will reach a stage whereby the kids need a proper piano (not necessary an expensive one) to progress further. Imagine learning to play Chopin’s Nocturne on a keyboard and piano. Of the two, the piano will allow one to have greater room to express his/her feelings. Even with the easy classical piano arrangements that my son is working on, I can feel a piano helped greatly in his learning. And the same goes for violin too. He started off with an inexpensive violin (even then, it costs us $280). He was fine with it too. However, he felt the difference when he played on a higher-end violin (a used violin from a kind friend, $600 violin & $200 strings). With a better violin, he can feel the music better and more motivated to practise harder. So yes, the right equipment does make a difference in learning music. At least in my kids’ case.

However, if the kid has absolutely no interest in music, a grand piano may just be another white elephant.

[metz]

red_ryder:

Hi all. My daughter is 6 yrs old, and has been learning piano since she was 5. She hasn’t taken the Grade 1 exam yet. She seems to be losing interest in learning, refusing to practice and asking us to stop the lessons. I don’t want to force her, but at the same time I don’t want her to regret this later in life. I know a few people who regretted not learning a musical instrument when young. Also it seems a waste to throw away 1 yrs worth of lessons just like that.


She was the one who asked for piano lessons at 5 yrs old. She used to love banging away at the piano ever since she was a toddler, but apparently not anymore. What should I do?

Have you spoken to her teacher about her progress? What are her views on it?

For kids who have reached a standstill in piano, my kids' teacher would advise the parents to let them take a year's break. After the break, the kids usually progress much better, probably due to maturity.

I understand what you mean by a waste. I wouldn't advise giving up easily, especially in the face of hardship. But if you have exhausted all means to get her interest back and it's still not working, then perhaps it's time to consider taking a break (maybe a short one)? Otherwise, it might end up an agony for your girl and yourself.

[Poonie]

red_ryder:

Hi all. My daughter is 6 yrs old, and has been learning piano since she was 5. She hasn’t taken the Grade 1 exam yet. She seems to be losing interest in learning, refusing to practice and asking us to stop the lessons. I don’t want to force her, but at the same time I don’t want her to regret this later in life. I know a few people who regretted not learning a musical instrument when young. Also it seems a waste to throw away 1 yrs worth of lessons just like that.


She was the one who asked for piano lessons at 5 yrs old. She used to love banging away at the piano ever since she was a toddler, but apparently not anymore. What should I do?

Hi red_ryder
One year is certainly too soon to give up. I've also heard of friends' teenagers who blamed their mum for not encouraging them on when they quit learning piano when they were much younger. I think you have to do your part by encouraging them on first. If after much encouragement your daughter's interest is still not rekindled then just let her quit and try other things like ballet or gymnastics etc. But first and foremost get a new piano teacher.

My kids were in this situation before, so I tried these and thier passion returned:

- During the rare occasions when they practiced, I would record their practice and make it my phone ring tone. They were thrilled each time my phone rang.
- Go onto Youtube and show them some amateur kids' piano concert or even home practice. This inspired them and I even told them that if they could play smoothly I would post them on Youtube too.
- My kids hated playing 'baby songs' got onto Youtube piano tutorial and let them learn Canon In D major or Fur Elise. They were very proud that they could play these world famous pieces although using right hand.

One word of caution is: Don't start her on exams so soon just let her be exposed to as many pieces as possible.

Good Luck!

[metz]

Poonie:

- Go onto Youtube and show them some amateur kids' piano concert or even home practice. This inspired them and I even told them that if they could play smoothly I would post them on Youtube too.

That works for us too, except I would upload their clips on my blog and share them with friends. My kids feel exceptionally excited and proud of themselves whenever they see themselves online. :love: