All About Life Without Maids

[Claudine Heng]

Hi, totally agree that with a maid at home, alot of things are just \"push\" to them - even like playing with my boy **GUILTY**


Guess going to be without one now, i need to think of ways to play with my son, the activities to be planned out for him, and of course (to me) the worrying part is the eating. Dont really like eating outside, and am afraid Tiffin delivery is too salty etc, so i still decide to attempt to cook maybe 2-3 times a week.

Actually i like the fact that i dont have a maid, due to the privacy so i am biting the bullet and give it a shot to go without one for this year. Next year will be much better since my boy will go for those 3 hour school - that gives me a bit of time to myself.

Jia You everyone!!!

[KSS Koh]

It’s encouraging reading this thread and I would love to share my story.


I do everything by myself, like cooking, grocery, driving my 2 kids to school, laundry, ironing, cleaning the house/toilets, P1 preparatory work with my DD and teaching my DS reading and both on Chinese. It’s not easy but I find it very satisfying. Of course, there are testing time so mommies who screamed and feels like ‘crazy’, you’re not alone (me included).

Even when I had a maid (in fact 2 maids initially, hopping not to overwork the maid), she just have to do general cleaning. I cook all the time as I believe it’s cleaner and it’s a way to show my love for my family by cooking their favorite food in a clean and healthy way. (Pls don’t get me wrong, maids can be trained to cook healthy and clean food too. It’s just I like to cook). Since not having a maid, I’ve switched to organic food and my whole family is benefiting from it. We’re closer as a family and we do more activities together.

I’m not as lucky to have any extended family help from family as both my parents had passed on and I do not have relatives. At least with some family help, it’ll free you up for some ‘I’ time, which I try to have weekly. Like taking a walk in the nature, reading a book, or just relax by the pool. Occasionally, my DH and I would have a date night and we’ll engage a babysitter off the web (pls be careful when selecting the babysitter for your children safety. I normally take those who works as preschool teachers, a reference point in case something happen).

In a nutshell, we’re much happier without a maid and we do what we can as a family. It is also healthier from a mental prospects as I do not have constant worrying and my children will learn to be more self sufficient and independent(Some parents are good in setting boundaries for their children to share the housework chores etc, which is excellent).

So to all the mommies without maid, kudos to all of us:)

[Vevey]

FTWM of 2:

Thanks for all the advice about my earlier post. Just wondering if most here agree which is a better solution for me: part time maid with 2 kids in infant/ childcare or full time maid with 1 kid at grandparents and the other at childcare.


Thanks in advice.

Hi, just to share I hv similar arrangement as u b4 ds1 went to full day cc at 2yo.
Went thru 4 maids in 2yrs+ n my parents tried their best to be accommodating towards the maid so as to minimise problems for me. Still, it didnt work out, so I decided to b a SAHM w the help of a maid when ds2 was born (4yrs gap).
Although I gave up on maids after 2 in 19 mths, I find that it is much easier to take care of kids ourselves n let maid did cooking n housework than sending maid n 1 kid to parents house. Much more straightforward.

I sensed from ur posts that your parents dont seem v willing to take care of grandkids, so do u really want to leave more kids in their care? Frustration might b vented on the maid n it will b another round of vicious cycle.
Have a good heart to heart talk w ur parents to assess their willingness, as they had already went thru their turn of raising their own kids n it's not an easy job.
If they r willing to help, then my it will ease their load if your older gal goes to childcare.
She would b more fortunate than her classmates who need to wait for parents to pick up after work at 7 or 9pm. At least she can go back to ur parents at 5pm etc.
If u hv a maid again, do lessen her housework n ur house on weekdays, esp b4 going to ur parents' house. She is just merely an employee. How much devotion can we expect?
If u decided not to rely on parents, mayb u want to consider nanny for baby n play school for older gal n pick up by nanny after sch, if nanny is agreeable.

[jkids]

mummies...thank you for your contributions, really appreciate though i dun agree wif some of your suggestions. i hv brainedstormed all the possible options. worse come to worse juz quit my job to look after them



kss koh:
kudo to you too!

[Pen88n]

I used to have this problem of not being able to make it in time to pick my kids from childcare and student care too. What we did was to engage a babysitter / nanny. They proceed to the nanny’s place via school bus after the childcare or school. The nanny allow them to bathe and eat their dinner there. At least my kids get home-cooked nutritious food. DH and I will then pick them up after work. Usually, we try to do so before 8pm (after we have a quick dinner outside). On days when we are late, the nanny is not too choosy and will help out. Similarly, in case my kids fall ill on certain day and unable to attend school / childcare, the nanny will care for them at their place and we do not need to rush to take urgent leave.


You may want to consider this option, but you may need to pay a bit more. I do not mind as I think my kids got to have good dinner (my nanny quite generous with food and her family eats well), and I have the convenience of not rushing back from work and not having to take urgent leave as and when.

[fightingmom]

Wow ! I picked up some precious tips from the previous posts !


Something i would like to add cos i am maid-less too for the past 12 years...

Teach your child to help out in the housework like sweeping the floor, folding the clothes, making up the bed every morning, clear and wash their own dishes after meal. I will handwash DD's school uniform everyday but otherwise will ensure that the washing machine is full load then i do the laundry - save water & electricity ! Save :moneyflies: too !

Nearer to exams, i don't cook but go for catering / dabao (after listening to a friend's advice) so that i can concentrate on supervising DD to revise and not so stressful.

On top of that, having a understanding and cooperative spouse helps ... yes, DH chips in the housework if it overwhelms me.

[jkids]

pen88n:

this is my ideal option too. am still looking for a nanny. being asking ard my neigborhood area/put flyers and thro agency. so far, the agency told me they only have nannies who can come to my house, not the other way round. can u share where u get yr nanny fr? and d rate u pay her for the service?

[Imami]

Hi jkids/pen88n,


This nanny idea is really good for parents who can't pick up the kids before 7pm. I always need to rush home immediately at 5.30pm so that I can pick my child up at 6pm at the cc and the family gets dinner by 7pm. Bosses are not too thrill of cos but they don't stop me from going at 5.30pm because I bring work back to do after my child sleeps or during the weekend when he's having enrichment classes.

When my child attends pri sch, I intend to take a break from work so that I can help him through the transition from cc to primary 1 and do away with student care for pri 1. I hear any horrible stories of how my friends/colleagues need to sit with the kids to complete the home work everyday becos the student care doesn't bother and the kids don't get enough sleep (no afternoon nap cos pm sessions and morning still hv to wake up as early as 7am cos parents need to work and send kids to student care by 8am).

I want to live longer :d so I thought I shd just take a break. During the one year break from work, perhaps I can also help a fellow parent to jaga her kid ie like a nanny

[Imami]

Got more tsp to share...


I put hand towel at strategic places eg water jug area, near to sink, so that a freshly rinsed glass can be placed on the towel. I also taught my child to place his cup (drink half way, to be continued) on the towel. Like that, I need not go crazy over the wiping!

When I do dishes like pizza or pan fried egg, I place a sheet of alum foil/baking paper on the plate before putting the food onto the plate. This makes the plate less oiler, so much easier to wash later.

Did I mention about my hair? I hv long hair and my hair drop like nobody's business. To keep the floor clean, I only comb hair in the toilet. And when washing my hair, I collect the water, sud included, into a pail. I realize this keeps my bathroom floor less grimy for longer. The collected water is used to flush the toilet bowl

[micollh]

will be maidless starting from May, can i ask what’s the brand of dryer you recommend? DH said dryer will consume electricity… but i thnk if raining i cant be at home to "chase the sun" for my kids uniform to dry… can advise ? thanks…is irobot really useful ?