2 is enough? 2nd can wait?
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Yes remember some of them. Not all. I was still very small that time. Oppss⦠I am disclosing my age.
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MrsSeah:
Yes remember some of them. Not all. I was still very small that time. Oppss... I am disclosing my age.
I remember NONE of them... Opps, I also disclose my age.
Either I am too young to remember any or walk with my eyes close most of the time :? -
MMM:
with regard to carrying on the family name, it is now an accepted norm in China that girl can have two family names in her nameI only remember the 2 girls under umbrella.
Quite interesting as it reflects the situation at that point. The government was trying to promote :
* Early marriage spells troubles. My aunties married at the age of 16-18. One of them is a great grandma at 68 years old. My mum got married at 25 which was considered late. Mum also said that a no. of them had shotgun marriage..... Interesting :scratchhead: as we expected the older generation to be more conversative.
* Having 2 daughters is good enough.... target at the population who think it is incomplete without a son. My dh is the only son and he has 4 sisters. He is no. 4 in the family. When the parents had the youngest sister, mil had to deliver at private clinic. There are still traditional thinking of having a son these days. More to carry on family name. However, girls these days can do just as well if not better. So it doesn't really matter. But I love my boy. It's just a opposite attracts thing where fathers just have soft spot for their daughters.
also in S'pore, there are families that sign marriage contract that stipulate the first child will carry the family name of the daughter (if she has no brothers) and the rest of her kids will carry the family name of the husband -
verykiasu2010:
also in S'pore, there are families that sign marriage contract that stipulate the first child will carry the family name of the daughter (if she has no brothers) and the rest of her kids will carry the family name of the husband
Really??? That shows like those Taiwan drama. I wonder if I will let my ds do such things :scratchhead: -
verykiasu2010:
Girls in China now very ζΆζ cos there are more men than ladies due to the old time one-child policy. So many families prefer boys than girls then so that they can carry on the family name.
with regard to carrying on the family name, it is now an accepted norm in China that girl can have two family names in her nameMMM:
I only remember the 2 girls under umbrella.
Quite interesting as it reflects the situation at that point. The government was trying to promote :
* Early marriage spells troubles. My aunties married at the age of 16-18. One of them is a great grandma at 68 years old. My mum got married at 25 which was considered late. Mum also said that a no. of them had shotgun marriage..... Interesting :scratchhead: as we expected the older generation to be more conversative.
* Having 2 daughters is good enough.... target at the population who think it is incomplete without a son. My dh is the only son and he has 4 sisters. He is no. 4 in the family. When the parents had the youngest sister, mil had to deliver at private clinic. There are still traditional thinking of having a son these days. More to carry on family name. However, girls these days can do just as well if not better. So it doesn't really matter. But I love my boy. It's just a opposite attracts thing where fathers just have soft spot for their daughters.
also in S'pore, there are families that sign marriage contract that stipulate the first child will carry the family name of the daughter (if she has no brothers) and the rest of her kids will carry the family name of the husband
I have a friend whose auntie adopted a baby girl from china whom her biological parents dumped her in a trench after knowing it was a girl. Lucky some kind souls found her and put her up in an orphanage. :sad: -
MMM:
if your DS marries his GF who is the only child in her whole generation, you won't disagree .... and could always adopt the PRC way of naming with two family names .... Tan-Lim Ah Kow .... for exampleverykiasu2010:
also in S'pore, there are families that sign marriage contract that stipulate the first child will carry the family name of the daughter (if she has no brothers) and the rest of her kids will carry the family name of the husband
Really??? That shows like those Taiwan drama. I wonder if I will let my ds do such things :scratchhead: -
MMM:
Marry the same surname lor. LOL!!! My colleague has the same surname as her hubby. Both are TAN. So her kids \"carried\" her surname too. :please:verykiasu2010:
also in S'pore, there are families that sign marriage contract that stipulate the first child will carry the family name of the daughter (if she has no brothers) and the rest of her kids will carry the family name of the husband
Really??? That shows like those Taiwan drama. I wonder if I will let my ds do such things :scratchhead: -
MrsSeah:
Marry the same surname lor. LOL!!! My colleague has the same surname as her hubby. Both are TAN. So her kids \"carried\" her surname too. :please:[/quote]same surname very risky ..... must check how many generations apart, in case high risk for \"in-breeding\"....that is why traditionally Chinese don't permit same surname marriageMMM:
[quote=\"verykiasu2010\"] also in S'pore, there are families that sign marriage contract that stipulate the first child will carry the family name of the daughter (if she has no brothers) and the rest of her kids will carry the family name of the husband
Really??? That shows like those Taiwan drama. I wonder if I will let my ds do such things :scratchhead:
there are some surnames descended from Tang dynasty and part of the clan of a few million are in south east asia ..... same surname risky -
Oppsgal:
If have more, probably have more things to fight for. Not enough rooms, Not enough toilet at home, Not enough money... maybe cannot even afford housing next time.kiddo:
[quote=\"MadScientist\"]Evidence of generations lost... And the start of SGporeans decline.
yes you said it ........2 is now too little ...........
when the minimum in my time is 5 ....most with 7, 8, 9 or 13 in a family
sharing is fun, fighting for food is also one of the joy of eating and
enjoying food hahaaa
DONT WAIT go for it :rahrah:
Anyway, I didn't recall see this poster before. What generation is that?[/quote]those who remember are Gen Xers...
I remember seeing half of them...
Anyways, I do what I think is best... have 4 already.
Clearly, the environmment is not helping one bit, but that will change - big time. -
MadScientist:
those who remember are Gen Xers...
I remember seeing half of them...
Anyways, I do what I think is best... have 4 already.
Clearly, the environmment is not helping one bit, but that will change - big time.
Good on you with 4 why you stop Sir ? :evil:
no R&D,you are a scientist :hi5: -
Singapore fertility rate is at all time low, but it is not unusual. Taiwan and Japan facing same problems.
How to have more kids when education is so stressful ? Canβt wait for CA/SA to be over every 10 weeks. My kids are 4 (almost 5) years apart but syllabus is so different. My younger one in P2 was taught models for Maths when her older sibling learnt it later. The Chinese exam (whole textbook of 12 chapters) yesterday had so many sections to revise. It will be a miracle if she passes it. -
For me, 1 is enough, 2nd no need wait because it would never happen. Haha
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daisyt:
For me, 1 is enough, 2nd no need wait because it would never happen. Haha
:rotflmao: :hi5:
With so many external pressure, I also will have only 1.
Got some people ask me when the 2nd one coming, tell me only have 1 kid, kid will be very lonely. I doubt my kid is lonely from the look. Always fighting toys with mummy. -
Those were the days. I was the 2nd girl in the family and the government influenced my parents not to have a little brother for me. Our next door neighbor had a 3rd child who was fined and penalized, faced difficulty in enrolling in pri school.
30 years later, they realized the mistake. But the 70s campaign is so successful that Iβm stopping at 2. ξ -
Wan:
The govt worried our parents will go on producing and producing like our grandparents' time mah. They forgot that our parents are educated and know how to plan...whether they can afford to have more kids or not. I have 'closed shop' already no matter how govt dangles goodies in front of me. The cost of bringing up 2 kids is stressful enough.
30 years later, they realized the mistake. But the 70s campaign is so successful that I'm stopping at 2. ξ -
Wan:
Those were the days. I was the 2nd girl in the family and the government influenced my parents not to have a little brother for me. Our next door neighbor had a 3rd child who was fined and penalized, faced difficulty in enrolling in pri school.
30 years later, they realized the mistake. But the 70s campaign is so successful that I'm stopping at 2. ξ
Mymum told me, I was having difficulty enrol to primary school because i have 2 younger brothers. She had to enrol me in the least popular school and very ironically, this least popular \"chinese turn to english\" school is top 10 primary school now. So my dd was fortunate to ride on my misfortunate. I find this so amused! -
Oppsgal:
If you're SHAM and can afford a lot of time with the kid, it is fine.daisyt:
For me, 1 is enough, 2nd no need wait because it would never happen. Haha
:rotflmao: :hi5:
With so many external pressure, I also will have only 1.
Got some people ask me when the 2nd one coming, tell me only have 1 kid, kid will be very lonely. I doubt my kid is lonely from the look. Always fighting toys with mummy.
But if both parents are working, and both parents might want some private or personal time to themselves, then, the single child might get very lonely when the parents have no time for him/her. It would be better to have a sibling.
With kids or not, couple needs some romance or private time together.
If the hubby never expect the wifey to spend private time together (like going on a date, watch movies etc..).. w/o the kids.. then, I feel, something could be very wrong in the r/s.. maybe the man got ECAs outside hence no need the wifey to keep him \"company\".....? -
limlim:
If you're SHAM and can afford a lot of time with the kid, it is fine.Oppsgal:
[quote=\"daisyt\"]For me, 1 is enough, 2nd no need wait because it would never happen. Haha
:rotflmao: :hi5:
With so many external pressure, I also will have only 1.
Got some people ask me when the 2nd one coming, tell me only have 1 kid, kid will be very lonely. I doubt my kid is lonely from the look. Always fighting toys with mummy.
But if both parents are working, and both parents might want some private or personal time to themselves, then, the single child might get very lonely when the parents have no time for him/her. It would be better to have a sibling.
With kids or not, couple needs some romance or private time together.
If the hubby never expect the wifey to spend private time together (like going on a date, watch movies etc..).. w/o the kids.. then, I feel, something could be very wrong in the r/s.. maybe the man got ECAs outside hence no need the wifey to keep him \"company\".....?[/quote]Might not be anything wrong if never go on a date or watch movies. Could be overstress working, no time to go date. -
Once kids come along, itβs hard to find couple time when kids are very young. My couple-time with hubby now is after dropping off son for tuition and we drink coffee while waiting. Or else we go supermarket to get groceries. 2 hours only before rushing back to pick him.
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Oppsgal:
Consider that, say, both got a day off.. if got siblings, can just leave them with grandparents or caregiver and go dating.. :evil: They can fight with each other or have each other as company.
Might not be anything wrong if never go on a date or watch movies. Could be overstress working, no time to go date.
If single kid.. the parents would feel guilty not keeping the kid company as the kid will be all alone if no bring him/her along.