My husband is addicted to his handphone :(

[ammonite]

Idono:

Why will gals feel \"lonely\" when there's so much to be done, ie housework, care for kids, teach them etc..... As a guy, i still don't quite get it. Maybe I might find some answers here? Any gals can put it in simple english? I really dislike it when like there's dirty laundry, clothes to iron etc and wife is just whatsapp with someone else. For me, i prefer to call when there's something to be discussed during the day. Only whatsapp when its really really urgent (ie arranging meetups, outings etc), or when the family have gone to bed, and i'm still full of energy. So i might end up gaming / watching movie or whatsapp.

Erm, brooms, ironing board and children do not talk like adults or fulfill adult needs?? :siam:

No excuse to be addicted of course, but if your wife says she is lonely,it may be a signal to spend some time together instead of you gaming and she whatsapping.

[missk]

Thanks guys and gals, that was so insightful. We are now seeking help, so hope things get better. I myself, am learing to understand how addictions form. Iguess I reacted badly, because Ididn't understand how he can find time to get addicted when we have a cute and demanding toddler who needs so much attention. And yes, it is really a game addiction, and I thought it was only youngsters who suffer that problem. Iguess it stems from a lot of issues, such as poor social skills, loneliness, poor self-control, not knowing what are the more important things to be done around the house, but that being said, it is good to encourage a hobby that can be shared by everyone

[Intermezzo]

missk:

Ididn't understand how he can find time to get addicted when we have a cute and demanding toddler who needs so much attention.

:rotflmao:

i'm sure your dh will succumb to his cuteness Very Soon ~

all the best!

[SandS]

missk:

Thanks guys and gals, that was so insightful. We are now seeking help, so hope things get better. I myself, am learing to understand how addictions form. Iguess I reacted badly, because Ididn't understand how he can find time to get addicted when we have a cute and demanding toddler who needs so much attention. And yes, it is really a game addiction, and I thought it was only youngsters who suffer that problem. Iguess it stems from a lot of issues, such as poor social skills, loneliness, poor self-control, not knowing what are the more important things to be done around the house, but that being said, it is good to encourage a hobby that can be shared by everyone

Hi Missk,
What kinda help are you referring to? My hubby is the same, he is quite addicted to his hp/ipad games. He can continually play the same game for months. I don't understand how his interest for some game can be sustained for so long (for eg PvZ). Sigh. He is socially active (goes out with colleagues/ex-colleague for dinner/drinks once awhile, weekly badminton sessions) and pretty ok self control (wakes up at 6am to go gym). But yes, he doesnt know what are the more important things to be done around the house! Ask him do 1, he do 1... and no more. Doesn't take the initiatives to follow on doing 2, 3. Any free time and he's glued to his games. And worse thing is he gets upset when the kids messed up his games. Can issue warning to the kids not to touch that game if they fiddle with his phone. It's just a game!! *goodness*

If its not convenient to mention here, can pm me what kinda help you are seeking?

[Idono]

ammonite:

Erm, brooms, ironing board and children do not talk like adults or fulfill adult needs?? :siam:

No excuse to be addicted of course, but if your wife says she is lonely,it may be a signal to spend some time together instead of you gaming and she whatsapping.

heh... sorry to confuse the thread. I'm asking in general, i'm not the hubby who is addicted to gaming in this thread. but just hitching on this thread to generally understand issues of Mars & Venus. Personally, I don't game that much. Only with my kid occasionally.

I'm a guy, so I understand why guy games. Like now Diablo 3, every guy is talking about it. So my feedback is that generally 1-2hrs gaming per day for guy is \"normal\" and when viewed as \"addiction\", then a lot of us guys are addicted

And i'm asking why gals will do social networking online / whatsapp etc when the family is home, kids to care for, hubby to talk to etc. Since I do plenty much of the housework as well and I understand brooms don't talk.

[Lavina]

SandS:

And worse thing is he gets upset when the kids messed up his games. Can issue warning to the kids not to touch that game if they fiddle with his phone. It's just a game!! *goodness*

Hehe I am a SAHM and used to be addicted to online games and was like that too. I'd move from one game to another but wouldn't stop. I was more concern about my fake money than my bank account. And i won't quit even when my hubby hinted strongly that I should. Now that i have quit, the fake money is nothing.

The will to stop must come from myself. The addiction must be replaced by something else which gives equal satisfaction. So yes, starting a healthy hobby will help us to stop gaming.