Help! My 11 yo Daughter Back in Diapers..

[BlueBells]

Same thought here … GP are general practitioners, not specialists. I suppose if you approach this with you child with the correct mindset, then there is nothing to feel embarrassed about, treat it a knowledge to be gained.


At 11 going on 12, she will soon reach her puberty. Best to sort this out asap before she starts her monthly cycle. Also, you can position it to her that seeing the urologist is to make sure she is all in the pink of health, not because she is having this problem, just like how we would go for annual body checkups and buy insurance.

[HiDaddy]

Thanks for the pointers. Its best to rule out every possibility. So DW will try to get her to urologist first and see how.



p.s. Her condition seems to have improved a bit. Daytime she’s not wetting as much now after we frequently remind her to go toilet, although there are still times that she will forget and still have accident. No improvement for night time though.

[MOTY]

HiDaddy,


Good luck sorting out the incontinence issues.

Hope all will be fine. :xedfingers:

Keep us updated if you can.

[mummy so kiasu]

My P6 boy still wet his bed occasionally. We have to put 2 layers of mattress protector on top of his mattress.Weather is too hot to use plastic sheet. I don’t think the problem is caused by stress. Have to get treatment from a specialist. Time being, no water after dinner, visit toilet before bed & wake her up once at night to visit the toilet. All the best!

[HiDaddy]

Hi guys, wife brought my daughter to the urologist a few days back and result just came out. Urologist conclude that there is nothing wrong with her physical conditions.


We will try and get her to a child psychologist to find the cause of her wetting. For now, she is still taking the Chinese tonics as we hope it will improve over time. She is still having accident quite frequently, even though wife and I keep reminding her to go toilet.

[puff]

Could be subconscious stress due to PSLE ?

[MOTY]

Good news to know she checked out physically. i was concern because tumour and other conditions can sometimes present in a similar way.


Hope you will be able to sort it out soon.

[HiDaddy]

Hi guys, brought daughter to psychologist a few days back. Took some time because it was fully booked.


The results were quite interesting. I had left my daughter with the psychologist in private during the session so I did not actually know how it went. The psychologist diagnosis is that she is subconsciously wetting herself due to mental development issue. Apparently her mental development was too fast for her age hence she mature a bit too quickly when she was young. The wetting is partly because she ‘want to be small’ again, and also because she want parental attention as her mother tends to go overseas often.

The psychologist say that while this is quite a rare situation, it has not been unheard of and is not one that have adverse effects. He mention that this is a phase that she is going through, but when her incontinence will recover depends on her emotions. He actually recommended keeping my daughter in diapers for the moment as it does not negatively affect her emotion and could actually benefit her by allowing her to revisit the feeling of ‘being small’. My first thought was that it would affect her mental development, but he said that it is highly unlikely. As for toilet training, he advised against doing so as her toilet training memory was merely ‘block’ away and forcing her could only bring undue strain. He also recommended more communication with her, especially with her mother.

I am quite surprised by what the psychologist have conclude, but he said that there is nothing to worry about. I guess the mind is complicated. My daughter is in diapers for the time being, since the psychologist said that there will be no problem, and her control has not improved. We are most relieved that it is not a dangerous condition, but then again we are unsure on when this phase will end.

[MOTY]

Thank you for updating.


Don’t human beings sometimes have the strangest coping mechanism?

Your daughter sounds like a thoughful, considerate and guai girl. She regressed subconciously as she did not want to verbally impose demands on you and you wife in a difficult situation (mummy overseas frequently). Hopefully with patience, encouraging her to express her needs and emotions, as well as a lot of tender loving care, she will regain her equilibirum.

There’s a book call the "5 love languages of children", a version of the popular 5 love languages, which may be a good read.
(disclaimer: i have never read it myself.)

[HiDaddy]

MOTY:

Thank you for updating.


Don't human beings sometimes have the strangest coping mechanism?

Your daughter sounds like a thoughful, considerate and guai girl. She regressed subconciously as she did not want to verbally impose demands on you and you wife in a difficult situation (mummy overseas frequently). Hopefully with patience, encouraging her to express her needs and emotions, as well as a lot of tender loving care, she will regain her equilibirum.

There's a book call the \"5 love languages of children\", a version of the popular 5 love languages, which may be a good read.
(disclaimer: i have never read it myself.)

I agree with you. Wife and I feel very lucky to have such a good daughter. We are trying our best to give her emotional support. She has always been a positive child, and even with this issue she is still looking at the bright side. Although her mother's job requirement means that she is overseas often, she still make it a point to talk to her. So as long as she is healthy and happy, I'm contented.