All About Full-Time Maids

[panickymum]

peapot:

Sigh!! I m trying tolerate my current maid. She tell her previous employer that she is very tired but everyday 2.30pm she is very free. She prepares dinner at 3.30pm?? Who the hell will prepare so early? Reason being she too free, paisei because I m on leave at home, pretend to do something. So now the previous employer feel so heartache for her. Good grief!! Sometimes I wonder the previous employer is the mother or what?!! That's why it is not a good idea if previous employer keep close in contact with the maid and choose to side her.


The employer even know her daily routine and what we eat for breakfast!!! I got abit pissed like the maid is the spy or something. Feel like changing her but once I called the agency and heard about the amount of money I have to pay, I withdraw my application. Aiyo, headache!

Are you sure what your maid tells you is from her previous employer ? Then why she wants to leave her sweet caring boss and come to you . Sometimes they just say to make you feel bad and they can laze around

Does your agency allow changing within a year ? Then why must you pay ?

[Funz]

autumnbronze:

My current maid is a transfer maid.


She has worked here for about 3 years.

Currently, she will not be paid until the 3rd month is up. She is given 2 days off a month.

Last weekend, she mentioned that she was going to her ex-employer's (a Muslim) house as she was holding an open house. She was exceptionally happy that day.

After she returned, I discovered she had a Western Union receipt under I assume, the ex-employer's name. A money transfer was made from Saudi Arabia, about $200. The sender was a male. My maid was holding that amount. She had also taken a taxi back on her off day, after calling me and
telling me that there was a train disruption in Paya Lebar.

I would like to approach her and talk to her about her expenses on her off days, on the pretext of offering some pocket money, as the basis of establishing where and why she is getting her 'extra money' from. I have to find ways of finding out via cross examination. However, I would appreciate
it if experienced members can enlighten me, based on assumptions, behind
the fact that she is having the money. This is the first time I am facing such a situation cuz my 1st maid was a gem. The 2nd one was a nightmare. I sent her back after 6 months. Both did not have off days, hence there were no issues with expenses.

Please don't tell me that she cannot be trusted etc..... I have learnt that I
have to manage my expectations of my maid. I do not have any major complaints about her. She takes care of the toddler well and does a good job of cleaning. So I would refrain from changing my maid unless there
warrants a concrete and plausible reason.

AB, no need to find excuses. Be up front and tell her yours is new working relationship and you are just puzzled about the WU receipt.

It is not a bad thing that she has a good relationship with her ex-employer. That goes to show she is not that bad a worker. The maid who looked after my granma still visits my aunt on her off days. I gather you did not get a character reference from her ex-employer and thus do not have their contact. If in your shoes, I will ask her to call her ex-employer for me to speak to them and get their contacts personally.

My maid gets off days too. So long as she is back by 9pm and all appears normal, I don't want to speculate too much as to how she spends her off days.

[straffan23]

Autumnbronze: This is super chim liao... I catch no ball also! :oops: :oops: My maid has very good relationship with her ex-employer too. I always think that maybe one day she will be asked to go back and work for them. However, in the meantime, I just tell myself - better good than bad, right? I mean, she did take care of the kid from newborn till 3 years old.


Here's another possibility: The WU receipt might have nothing to do with her whatsoever. Just someone asking for something to be passed to another person. Between maids, surely they do this all the time? If you have seen the WU receipt in a rather \"open\" place, you could just casually mention it and ask her what is it about? Maybe I am being ignorrant... I never once checked on my maid - not her handphone, not her room, not her bag! I used to live with my boss, too - he said, always innocent until proven guilty - if he feels there's a need to go through my things, then he should ask me to move out altogether?

[autumnbronze]

Hi Straffan23,


Thanks for responding

Think you have misunderstood my intention. Aiya, there is nothing chim about my post. I have clarified all questions already.

If I thought my helper was guilty at all, I wouldn't be posting and seeking advice. I never indicated that I went through my helper's belongings. And anyway, I know there are employers who do, just to keep abreast of what is going on, cuz they feel that they can never get a complete picture of what is happening in their maid's lives. So be it. That is their prerogative. And yes, both you and Funz are right, it is a good thing that she is in touch with her ex-employers. She has quite a good work track record. I mentioned that earlier on.


Asking them outright does not yield the so called desired answer that you
are looking for. They are known to lie. I am ok with petty lies. We are guilty of that too, sometimes. Like I mentioned before, I have learnt to
manage my expectations with regards to maid issues. And this maid is as good as it gets. We don't have a habit of changing maids just like that. We
tend to talk it out, if need be, counsel them too. Thats how tolerant we are.

My first maid was a gem. She was with us for 4 years. But, during her 3rd year with us, after she met up with her \"aunt\", she changed, she became more, how should I put it, street smart maybe? Petty lies, using the hp until
late at night etc ... That said, we still renewed her contract for one more year cuz we saw the 'bigger picture'. She never gave us any problems and was trustworthy when it came to handling my kiddos. I am just sharing my experience. That is why I have to resort using the 'cross examination, by the way method' of questioning my helpers. So far this method has worked
for me. But then again, to each his own lah.

I am just worried cuz I know what I went through the past 6 months with my nightmarish 2nd maid. It was only after repeated attempts to counsel her failed that we sent her packing back to Indo. She just couldn't keep to her word. I don't want a repeat of this. And because I have absolutely no experience with maids having off days and what they do then, hence my post here.

Anyway, some of the members like Funz and peapot have really allayed my concerns and steered me in the right direction, without being judgmental. In fact, you have made a point pertaining to the WU receipt that has given me another food for thought, and I appreciate that. Thank you. :hugs:

[autumnbronze]

Funz:

AB, no need to find excuses. Be up front and tell her yours is new working relationship and you are just puzzled about the WU receipt.

It is not a bad thing that she has a good relationship with her ex-employer. That goes to show she is not that bad a worker. The maid who looked after my granma still visits my aunt on her off days. I gather you did not get a character reference from her ex-employer and thus do not have their contact. If in your shoes, I will ask her to call her ex-employer for me to speak to them and get their contacts personally.

My maid gets off days too. So long as she is back by 9pm and all appears normal, I don't want to speculate too much as to how she spends her off days.

Thanks Funz, for the sound advice. Appreciate it :hugs:

[bluebellas]

autumnbronze


Interestingly, my first maid also "changed" after meeting her "aunt" and started making demands…

[autumnbronze]

bluebellas:

autumnbronze


Interestingly, my first maid also \"changed\" after meeting her \"aunt\" and started making demands...

Hi bluebellas,

It was fortunate that the 1st maid only picked up those habits. She was never demanding. Because she started work with us way before she met her \"aunt\", she had already established a relationship with us and was like family, in a way.

The irony is that on the way to the airport, when I asked her if she was going to continue to be active on fbk, she admitted that it is very expensive to surf the Internet in Indo, so very unlikely.

[cool_hi]

HI, my mynmar maid goinf bk in mid-nov, for 3 weeks home leave..

1)work permit expire on 2nd dec 2012, need renew..but coz passport expire on 1st sept 2013, so her work permit can only renew till 1st aug 2013(1 month before passport expire) right??
2) & her passport, I can't renew now, coz has to be <6 mths to expiry date, then can renew right?

3) so after i renew her work permit(which should start from 2nd dec 2012to 1st aug 2013), she can go home visit(16th Nov-6th dec), & just show her new work permit card when re-enter s'pore right?
4) but MOM advised+reminded me to check with mynmar embassy on whether there is any special requirement/documents etc, when she leave mynmar to come back s'pore to work..in case, she is stopped by officials there, and cannot come back s'pore..
Tried to call embassy, can't get anyone to ans call yet..& even if anyone ans, very scared they may not understand my quiries/worse, anyhow ans
So would appreciate if anyone can share how is it like/anything to take note of, if they did allow mynmar maid go back for home leave, VERY recently..

Thanks a lot!!

[Mylittletrumpet]

Hi all,


I am quite new to handling maids as this is the first time I have a maid and she has been with me for almost a year. I wouldn’t say she is outstanding. Her performance is just so so but as long as she takes care of my DS well, I will give leeways.

It’s indeed true that maid will change after their loan is paid off and when they get their full salary. She has been yakking on the phone every night with her cousin exchanging stories and gossiping. My maid is always telling me that her cousin say this, her cousin says that etc… She also told me that this cousin of hers has a Bangladesh boyfriend. I didn’t have good impression of this cousin of hers.

Anyway, few mths ago I told her she is not allowed off days at least until next year and she agreed but recently my maid has requested for off day to go out with her cousin and friends and I Just want to know your thoughts about the timing of their off days (i.e the time she is allowed to go out and return home).

In the hope of enticing her not to have off days if possible, I told her before that I will provide toiletries for her as long as she doesn’t have off days (obviously this stunt doesn’t work). Actually I am ok with providing the toiletries but Just wanna know your thoughts whether you will buy toiletries for your maid’s use or are they expected to buy their own?

Thanks in advance for sharing your thoughts and advices!

[pinkybear]

For my experiences, I would say it depends on the maid.

For my old maid she didnt change after the loan finished. But changed after I gave her the phone.

For my current 2 maids,
- younger one does not change after the loan finished, works for 1 year
- older one started to slack after the first 3 months :rant: ... I still cant find a replacement yet : (