The Real Reason Why We Send Our Children to Tuition

[jedamum]

Kissgurami:

if don't provide tuition, wonder if the child will ever say \"mummy your fault , you didn't pay for my tuition.\"

My boy does not have math tuition. We leave it for him to self advance study syllabus and teacher to teach, with his dad to clarify his doubts. Heuristic math we leave it to school to cover. Come p5, suddenly we are press for time and his learning curve became steep overnight, demanding him to grasp heuristics questions yet refusing him the luxury of time to work by himself and learn at his pace as time are needed for his weaker subjects. Overnight, his strongest subject becomes his weakest.

I asked him if I should have signed him up for math enrichment at lower primary despite his good subject grades, like I did now for his younger brother. He said he wished that I had as he would have bigger lead time to tackle heuristics when its focus were not so much in lower primary.

We may or may not know what is best for our kids. Turning to tuition prematurely could be what parents are willing to pay for so they won't live to regret when it is too late.

[SAHM_TAN]

Jedamum,


Do you regret not sending your ds to tuition earlier?

[jedamum]

SAHM_TAN:

Jedamum,


Do you regret not sending your ds to tuition earlier?

I have mixed feelings.
If I am a ftwm, I will certainly regret.
But we are operating this household on a single income, so have to say that it was the preferred arrangement then. Not so much regret on not sending for tuition, but more on whether I was fair to him when compared to his brother.

I have yet to experience the impact of the decision: the test will come in if ds2 emerge stronger than ds1, will ds1 cry foul if he could not get into his preferred school later on.

Their relationship is quite good, so while ds1 may feel envious- like how I sent ds2 a 'better' kindergarten but ds1 to pcf only - he knows that I didn't know better earlier.

[SAHM_TAN]

jedamum:

SAHM_TAN:

Jedamum,


Do you regret not sending your ds to tuition earlier?

I have mixed feelings.
If I am a ftwm, I will certainly regret.
But we are operating this household on a single income, so have to say that it was the preferred arrangement then. Not so much regret on not sending for tuition, but more on whether I was fair to him when compared to his brother.

I have yet to experience the impact of the decision: the test will come in if ds2 emerge stronger than ds1, will ds1 cry foul if he could not get into his preferred school later on.

Their relationship is quite good, so while ds1 may feel envious- like how I sent ds2 a 'better' kindergarten but ds1 to pcf only - he knows that I didn't know better earlier.

I'm trying to work out my thinking.

dd1 is my first child, I sent her to I CAN READ but didn't work out. We tried helping her but nothing really works. But when she reached 7 yos she started to read. There are still some experts who feel that 7 yos is the age for reading.

ds, I didn't send him to I CAN READ, he was able to read at about 3.5 yos with what he learnt at kindy and the use of the Peter and Jane series.

bb 2.5 yos still can't speak but her fine and gross motor skills are far more superior than her siblings at the same age.

Now, I'm trying to decide..........let the kids develop at their natural pace or........I find that dd1 will understand at her pace, there's no rushing her. When it's \"the time\" she will get it, like reading.....
Ds learns what he wants to learn. While bb just loves to be with me.

[sharonkhoo]

jedamum:

I have yet to experience the impact of the decision: the test will come in if ds2 emerge stronger than ds1, will ds1 cry foul if he could not get into his preferred school later on.


Their relationship is quite good, so while ds1 may feel envious- like how I sent ds2 a 'better' kindergarten but ds1 to pcf only - he knows that I didn't know better earlier.

For their sake, help your older son take other factors into account, especially, is the younger brother naturally better at Maths? There is no real way to tell if tuition would have helped the older one significantly. There are so many kids who did worse than they would have liked despite having tuition. I have 2 girls who are so very different - actually we have given far more attention and help to the weaker one, while the other mostly does it on her own and asks for help when she wants some. On the other hand, we aim much higher for the stronger one in terms of which school we choose for her, getting her to learn more beyond the basics, exposing her to more etc. For the weaker one, we don't want to stress her and just aim for what we think she can achieve. Will she blame us for not pushing her? I hope not.

[buds]

SAHM_TAN:

I'm trying to work out my thinking.


dd1 is my first child, I sent her to I CAN READ but didn't work out. We tried helping her but nothing really works. But when she reached 7 yos she started to read. There are still some experts who feel that 7 yos is the age for reading.

ds, I didn't send him to I CAN READ, he was able to read at about 3.5 yos with what he learnt at kindy and the use of the Peter and Jane series.

bb 2.5 yos still can't speak but her fine and gross motor skills are far more superior than her siblings at the same age.

Now, I'm trying to decide..........let the kids develop at their natural pace or........I find that dd1 will understand at her pace, there's no rushing her. When it's \"the time\" she will get it, like reading.....
Ds learns what he wants to learn. While bb just loves to be with me.

SAHM_TAN dearest.. I believe you HAVE worked it out.

Now, give yourself that pat on your back. :snuggles:

[SAHM_TAN]

buds:

SAHM_TAN:

I'm trying to work out my thinking.


dd1 is my first child, I sent her to I CAN READ but didn't work out. We tried helping her but nothing really works. But when she reached 7 yos she started to read. There are still some experts who feel that 7 yos is the age for reading.

ds, I didn't send him to I CAN READ, he was able to read at about 3.5 yos with what he learnt at kindy and the use of the Peter and Jane series.

bb 2.5 yos still can't speak but her fine and gross motor skills are far more superior than her siblings at the same age.

Now, I'm trying to decide..........let the kids develop at their natural pace or........I find that dd1 will understand at her pace, there's no rushing her. When it's \"the time\" she will get it, like reading.....
Ds learns what he wants to learn. While bb just loves to be with me.

SAHM_TAN dearest.. I believe you HAVE worked it out.

Now, give yourself that pat on your back. :snuggles:

I need a pinch of courage and a giant leap of faith

[Kissgurami]

jedamum:

SAHM_TAN:

Jedamum,


Do you regret not sending your ds to tuition earlier?

I have mixed feelings.
If I am a ftwm, I will certainly regret.
But we are operating this household on a single income, so have to say that it was the preferred arrangement then. Not so much regret on not sending for tuition, but more on whether I was fair to him when compared to his brother.

I have yet to experience the impact of the decision: the test will come in if ds2 emerge stronger than ds1, will ds1 cry foul if he could not get into his preferred school later on.

Their relationship is quite good, so while ds1 may feel envious- like how I sent ds2 a 'better' kindergarten but ds1 to pcf only - he knows that I didn't know better earlier.

I had the same feeling on whether I was fair to DD2. DD1 had a chance to go to those premium infant-care and childcare but due to the split, DD2 ended with void deck infant care since I had to bear the expenses.

With that, I did see a difference in DDs. it is until now that I feel much better as she is coping well.

the tuition bit is tricky so I do ask DDs on how they feel. if they have no heart to go, it is really a waste of money.

[AdonciaTang]

Beautyful Minds:

janet_lee88:

The tuition our kids attend is not to boost morale...it's genuine case of coping with higher standard now.


Daughter's picture compo seems tough for her level (p3). When i enquired, I was informed that it is tougher for the purpose of scaffolding :?

Son's PSLE compo last year...2 choose 1, be it continuous (strange sound in the library) or picture composition...Easy to write out of point. Asked my son what does 'strange' sound refer to...he said definitely cannot be a cry...so it is like sound of robot or snake hissing.
So with such PSLE questions, kids need tuition.

Yes, the PSLE standards are definitely higher now. As we follow closely what the school exam papers are testing, we can actually see that the exam papers are getting slightly tougher and tougher.

We think that it is because over the years, harder questions are being answered correctly by more and more students. Exam setters have no choice but to introduce even harder questions. This leads to harder exams.

Which is why they are getting more stress than usual. My son had nightmare before math test 2 weeks ago. So heart pain. Realized he was worried he couldn't finish his paper on time.

[senseimichael]

Beautyful Minds:

We think that it is because over the years, harder questions are being answered correctly by more and more students. Exam setters have no choice but to introduce even harder questions. This leads to harder exams.

And all because the PSLE is one great sieve to cream out the scholars from the farmers...