The Birds and the Bees

[Nihauma]

this happened recently.

DS: what is sex?
me: :yikes: how do u know this?
ds: my friend talked about it. he said it is a gross thing. so what is it?
me: i will tell u when u r in P6. (he is 8 years old)

weeks later

dS: i asked father what is sex. he told me but i dont understand what he means.
me: :yikes: what did he say?
ds : i dont know...something about kissing and other stuff...
me: :slapshead:
ds: is that why u didnt tell me? cause i wont understand anyway?
me: yes yes

after that i asked dh what he told ds. he said he told him word for word \"its a procreation process. When 2 person in love, express their love physically\"

no wonder he doesnt understand.

anyway 8 yrs old need to explain in detail about sex? i am thinking wait till he reaches puberty.

so when did your children asked u and what was ur answer?

[tankee]

DS asked about it when he was 8


I spoke to him factually and scientifically, then I shown him the following video. And told him that he is very special, being 1 out of the 300 million, and contains both mummy's & daddy's gene.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5OvgQW6FG4][/youtube]

[sundaymorning]

Apricot:

I chanced upon this good article in Reader's Digest. Though titled `Talking Sex with Teens', I think the tactic employed could be use for younger/older kids and for other purposes.



http://i47.tinypic.com/affocm.jpg\">

Hi Apricot
Thanks for sharing !!
yeah probably will try that when its time to explain .

[Sun_2010]

tankee:

DS asked about it when he was 8


I spoke to him factually and scientifically, then I shown him the following video. And told him that he is very special, being 1 out of the 300 million, and contains both mummy's & daddy's gene.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_5OvgQW6FG4][/youtube]

That was very informative for my DS. He watched it a few times.
And he declared that he was the \"winner sperm\" :faint:

There is another Ted talk we saw Conception to birth -- visualized , its sort of the next part . The visualisation part starts at 2:00 min

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKyljukBE70][/youtube]

[Imami]

The winner sperm! :rotflmao:


I felt sad watching the video. It is just a lot of hard work for the. Whole pregnancy to take place, be established, developing from a tiny single cell to embro to zygote to feotus and then eventually a baby's birth. Each of our birth is just such a miracle. And yet, we still hv people who are aborting for selfish or senseless reasons :faint: or worse, abandoning newborns irresponsibly.

My sil just suffered a miscarriage. She was already in her second trimester. I remembered when I was in my second trimester, I could feel my son's movements, his blowing bubbles already... :sad:

Whenever I feel the miracle of life/procreation, I appreciate my winner sperm more.

[shisan]

Im facing this now. My 11.5 yr old was so flustered that he had a wet dream, so kan cheong he kept cleaning the bed at 2am. I also dont know how to talk to him or what to say. Or are we supposed to even have anything to say to him? So he doesnt feel like he’s strange?

And this age is too young to have wet dreams, no?

[Liew Nga Wing]

shisan\" post_id=\"2056114\" time=\"1642502079\" user_id=\"145867:

Im facing this now. My 11.5 yr old was so flustered that he had a wet dream, so kan cheong he kept cleaning the bed at 2am. I also dont know how to talk to him or what to say. Or are we supposed to even have anything to say to him? So he doesnt feel like he’s strange?
And this age is too young to have wet dreams, no?

From your posts here and in the Roblox thread, I found that your DS is very easy to Kan Cheong over small issues. It may becuase he has set a very high standard behaviour for himself and others and never accept when he fail to comply these standards. You may talk to him and let him know that \"the sky is not going to fall\" even things turn out is not as he expects. Actually, it is good for your DS to have such self discipline but have to guide him when it is time to let things go. If this still not work, you may consider to bring him to visit some psychiatric to see whether any medication can help.

[sushi88]

shisan\" post_id=\"2056114\" time=\"1642502079\" user_id=\"145867:

Im facing this now. My 11.5 yr old was so flustered that he had a wet dream, so kan cheong he kept cleaning the bed at 2am. I also dont know how to talk to him or what to say. Or are we supposed to even have anything to say to him? So he doesnt feel like he’s strange?
And this age is too young to have wet dreams, no?

I think it is important to normalise this phenomenon for him so that he would not think he is strange. In fact he is still a good innocent boy. Wet dream is a biological phenomenon not controllable. These days, whether boys or girls, changes in them occur earlier than the usual 13-year-old guideline, so nothing to worry about.

Congratulate him that his body is telling him ahead that more changes would be coming his way(voice change, new body hair etc), like a harbinger of good news of his healthy growth. Everyone needs to grow up and growing up means learning more responsibility. Cleaning himself and his bed is part of the responsibility, definitely not viewed as an anxiety. Praise him for being responsible but let him know that you would put a laundry bag aside for his clothes or bedsheets so he would not need to rush to wash them at 2am.

This is a simple and good article as a guide.
https://www.metroparent.com/parenting/tweens-teens/wet-dreams-boys-deal-part-life/

As a parent, it is good news for you that your son is still innocent, if you know what I mean.

[shisan]

Ah i see. Ok my first time going through boy-puberty. And absolutely no idea about wet dreams, how they begin and what actually happens for the young boy. The father only says “it’s like that one”. Yes yes, he’s still innocent, and Im grateful. Other set of problems though, like poor attitude, talking back, rude…

But i do agree, he can be easily kan cheong - like me. I kept calm in front of him, then quickly google ‘wet dreams’… but to the extent of psychiatric help, probably not yet, although an aunt once suggested so because my son seems insecure.
I just gotta assure him it’s normal.

[shisan]

Hi all, I’m back… my son is so afraid and I’m not so sure if he’s ok. He had wet dream again last night at 4am. So he woke up to get changed. Then went back to sleep. An hour later it happened again, and he got very frightened and worried, saying there must be something wrong because it happened twice in a night. I don’t really know how to help him. Is this excessive or normal?