In-law problems?

[KSmom8]

Thank goodness MIL has never asked for our house keys.


My mum has a set of my house keys and I have a set of hers. It's for emergency purposes. However, we still call beforehand to check before visiting, and we do not let ourselves in, regardless of whether the owner is at home. I think it's basic courtesy.

[KSmom8]

I remembered this …


During the tea ceremony, my MIL gave me a gold chain and put it around my neck. Felt it was strange then, cos I was already wearing a necklace ( that was more impressive ) and it clashed with her necklace. Removed it when I was at my parent’s.

Many years later, when my Aunt was preparing for my cousin’s wedding, my Aunt mentioned that she was angry when she saw what my MIL did. Said the act of putting a chain around my neck was very traditional and aim was to control and make me obey her.

It gave me insight into my MIL’s mentality. I laughed it off and told my Aunt that it does not work, my MIL cannot control me and neither do I obey her.

[janet88]

KSmom8:

Many years later, when my Aunt was preparing for my cousin's wedding, my Aunt mentioned that she was angry when she saw what my MIL did. Said the act of putting a chain around my neck was very traditional and aim was to control and make me obey her.


It gave me insight into my MIL's mentality. I laughed it off and told my Aunt that it does not work, my MIL cannot control me and neither do I obey her.

i didn't know the necklace she gave had that significance :scratchhead:
anyway, i will not let her control me...dream on.

[SAHM Chew]

Anyone had similar experience? My mil likes to say ‘slowly slowly’ to the kids. Everything also says ‘slowly slowly’.

Eg, after my kids had eaten for one hr and had not finish and I am getting impatient, I will tell them to hurry up, cos it is almost 7pm, n they have homework to do. They need to sleep by 9pm. My mil will come n tell them, ‘eat slowly, eat slowly, never mind’ … My blood is boiling, as I need them to finish everything before bedtime.
Or if my kids are wearing socks and shoes to prepare to go to school, and the sch bus will be coming, my mil will says ‘wear slowly, don’t rush, slowly, slowly’… Even I hinted and said that the bus is coming… She will still continue the same words…

[popireis]

Haha sounds more like my mum than my MIL

[janet88]

Everything also 慢慢吃，慢慢穿，慢慢做. How come in laws love to sing opposite tune? We have to rush kids to eat fast, so as to get homework done and then go to bed. If everything 慢慢, then sure to stretch into midnight and nothing is done.

[vinegar]

i guess this is so called generation gap. During their generation, not so fast paced,not so demanding…Also,imagine they reach this retiring age,they sort of losing touch with society…

[vinegar]

At times,I also feel irritating when my MIL behaves like this.But,sometx,when i sit quietly n think,perhaps they r right…cannot be focus on certain areas n forget abt others such as health n mental health

[janet88]

vinegar:

At times,I also feel irritating when my MIL behaves like this.But,sometx,when i sit quietly n think,perhaps they r right....cannot be focus on certain areas n forget abt others such as health n mental health

I understand it is not healthy to gulp food down...but do we have time for kids to sit down and eat at their own leisure? Time is very tight everyday.

[SAHM Chew]

janet_lee88:

vinegar:

At times,I also feel irritating when my MIL behaves like this.But,sometx,when i sit quietly n think,perhaps they r right....cannot be focus on certain areas n forget abt others such as health n mental health

I understand it is not healthy to gulp food down...but do we have time for kids to sit down and eat at their own leisure? Time is very tight everyday.

But my kids have already taken 1 hr and have not finish. And still tell them to eat slowly??? :gloomy:

My mil also do not take 1 hr to eat....

But I believed about the generation gap. No wonder we could not get along.