Facebook & maid

[syen27]

Linlin, I also could not figure out why if my maid can tahan 1 year 4 months without hp cannot tahan not having hp for the day… haha… one word, addiction…

[gumiho]

It is common for maid to have facebook nowadays.

My maid has one… Initially I cannot be bother about her having FB as I believe in fairness.
We can have one, why not the maid. They are also human like us.

This morning, my father mentioned to me that my helper was using our house phone everyday for an hour plus chatting with her boyfriend (when all of us are not around except for my father).
We allow her to own a handphone, we even allow her to chat on the phone during working hour (-_-"") then she has no reason to utilize our home phone for personal call because we are paying for the phone bill.
Again, I login to her facebook today. Shockingly, her status is "In a relationship with XXXX" and there are even mushy comments between her and her lover. (She was married with 2 kids).

Well… I know I shouldn’t bother in her personal affair but when she is using our home phone to chit chat with her lover… It bothers me !!
All thanks to FB ! I know about her personal life when she is out of our house. It may not be bad for the maid to own a FB afterall.

Apparently, my main concern is to whether send her home or continue to tolerate her until her contract ends (Dec’13) ?

[nms1]

Linlin:

Majority maid don't know how to control themselves. If your maid got hp, tablet or com and she behave well then gd for u. But for me, I don't tink is necessity to waste money to surf net, on the phone etc. Normally we cannot imagine but without hp, internet etc u still able to survive. I have many friends too but I know my purpose is to work not to play so I do my part. In indo, to surf net there is not very convenience compare to SG unless you got hp. The hp bill there for calling SG is very exp. In fact when I work indo drawing $400 a mth in the past so I'm able to describe the feeling. Is really the matter whether you want or you don't want to do ur job well. I live with the rest foreigner like Phili, PRC etc and I'm proud to say I do housechores everyday after my work. I helped the rest to wash clothes, ironing, prepare meal for lunch, sweep n wash the floor daily (not u using mop is being down wash that kind).

Even the locals there, also surprised that SG ppl can do housechores etc as they are not that hardworking.
When I stay there, there is no problem but after I came back SG a week plus my ex boss approach me and ask me question abt the place. My colleagues there experience \"dirty\" thing there and got disturb even there is prayers done but they have to move out.
I'm lucky that I didn't have such ghostly experience. I told my hubby where the 3rd eye ppl say she see (1 underneath the bed, living room corner n 2 toilets) and me, I always bend down to wipe underneath the bed and if that \"thing\" is always there I think he/she always stare at me.
I'm not working as helper, I'm a training teacher there.

I think the issue is that they are free to do what they want with their money - as long as it is legal. We cannot dictate that, we can only advise

My maid has taken several advances from us due to sickness and death in the family so when she asked again this month to send back for tuition I told her it was absolutely the last time and made her sign a paper to say that. I pointed out that she needs to save some money for herself and start saying no to the family. That much we can do but if they still choose to waste the money on phones, internet, clothes or whatever that's not our problem or responsibility. My boss doesn't tell me how to spend my salary!

[Linlin]

syen27:

Linlin, I also could not figure out why if my maid can tahan 1 year 4 months without hp cannot tahan not having hp for the day.. haha.. one word, addiction..

Yup

[Linlin]

gumiho:

It is common for maid to have facebook nowadays.

My maid has one......... Initially I cannot be bother about her having FB as I believe in fairness.
We can have one, why not the maid. They are also human like us.

This morning, my father mentioned to me that my helper was using our house phone everyday for an hour plus chatting with her boyfriend (when all of us are not around except for my father).
We allow her to own a handphone, we even allow her to chat on the phone during working hour (-_-\"\") then she has no reason to utilize our home phone for personal call because we are paying for the phone bill.
Again, I login to her facebook today. Shockingly, her status is \"In a relationship with XXXX\" and there are even mushy comments between her and her lover. (She was married with 2 kids).

Well...... I know I shouldn't bother in her personal affair but when she is using our home phone to chit chat with her lover..... It bothers me !!
All thanks to FB ! I know about her personal life when she is out of our house. It may not be bad for the maid to own a FB afterall.

Apparently, my main concern is to whether send her home or continue to tolerate her until her contract ends (Dec'13) ?

Some maids will find chance to bring the bf home or meet them. If you are of the view that this maid is of no value to you and tasks assigned to her is always incomplete, then might as well send her back and get another one.

[Linlin]

nms1:

Linlin:

Majority maid don't know how to control themselves. If your maid got hp, tablet or com and she behave well then gd for u. But for me, I don't tink is necessity to waste money to surf net, on the phone etc. Normally we cannot imagine but without hp, internet etc u still able to survive. I have many friends too but I know my purpose is to work not to play so I do my part. In indo, to surf net there is not very convenience compare to SG unless you got hp. The hp bill there for calling SG is very exp. In fact when I work indo drawing $400 a mth in the past so I'm able to describe the feeling. Is really the matter whether you want or you don't want to do ur job well. I live with the rest foreigner like Phili, PRC etc and I'm proud to say I do housechores everyday after my work. I helped the rest to wash clothes, ironing, prepare meal for lunch, sweep n wash the floor daily (not u using mop is being down wash that kind).

Even the locals there, also surprised that SG ppl can do housechores etc as they are not that hardworking.
When I stay there, there is no problem but after I came back SG a week plus my ex boss approach me and ask me question abt the place. My colleagues there experience \"dirty\" thing there and got disturb even there is prayers done but they have to move out.
I'm lucky that I didn't have such ghostly experience. I told my hubby where the 3rd eye ppl say she see (1 underneath the bed, living room corner n 2 toilets) and me, I always bend down to wipe underneath the bed and if that \"thing\" is always there I think he/she always stare at me.
I'm not working as helper, I'm a training teacher there.

I think the issue is that they are free to do what they want with their money - as long as it is legal. We cannot dictate that, we can only advise

My maid has taken several advances from us due to sickness and death in the family so when she asked again this month to send back for tuition I told her it was absolutely the last time and made her sign a paper to say that. I pointed out that she needs to save some money for herself and start saying no to the family. That much we can do but if they still choose to waste the money on phones, internet, clothes or whatever that's not our problem or responsibility. My boss doesn't tell me how to spend my salary!

You are right to say that they can do what they want as long as it is legal. However I just cannot imagine when your maid starts to borrow from legal moneylender when you tell her that its the last time you are giving her credit advances. Do you know that if there are any issues your maid has with you, and it involves MOM or Embassy, what do you think will happen to your credit advances?
It depends on how we advise these people. They are from a very much backward country and certain things that we know and understand logically might not appear as common sense to them; your maid is considered part of your family, when the so called legal things you did not intervene first time on, it's always going to be difficult down the road. And when it leads on to more problems like maid bringing bfs when no one is at home, it spells more trouble for you and your family right?

If their family is genuine suffering and they have opportunity to work overseas to help their family improve conditions. Will they waste money having fb, hp, bf, UP off day or any luxury thing. Normal ppl like us will definitely want to put our parents/ kids or siblings etc first instead of ourselves if not y want to go overseas to work hard for $ unless their purpose for the job is for themselves then is up to us whether we want to hired them. How we spent our money is up to us but if we overspend and inconvenience others is it worth it? A sensible person will definitely know the answer!

[Harlequin]

I don't think is right to take an office employment as the absolute guideline for employment of domestic helper.


As an employer of both groups, I am definitely using different yardstick.

Simply put--

I do not have staff that think that they can knock at my door anytime for salary advancement. If they are in need of money, that's not a problem of mine.

I do not get my gate crashed for they personal loan or loan shark. For that matter, they can't use my home address as theirs, they do not have a chance to disrupt my life.

I would not be held responsible when my staff got herself pregnant from her EMA.

I do not have to answer to any authority if she thinks she can manage another job after office hours, unless the part time job is conflict of interest that might compromised my business.

I do not also, at anytime, put my young children under their charge.

I do not eat what my staff cooked, even she hates me, I will have no worry that my food be spiked.

I do not let them in charge of the security of my house, my belonging.

I do not house them, I do not subject to their emotional blackmail, I do not have to worry that they failed bi-yearly medical check up... even they are HIV positive we can still retain their service because we do not need to have close personal contact to interact.

I do not have the obligation to fly her home should she resigned.

In short, I do not have that much of the obligation for the average office staff.


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Employer of a maid, is more to that... we are, their guardians... we have to ensure their safety and their well being, among other things...

Domestic helpers aren't our office staff. Period. Don't get yourself confused.

We cannot rely solely on them to auto assume their obligatory role to their employers, so, we exercise whatever influences we have on them, we guide, we fuss, we nag, we get ourselves upset and upset them...

For every right one wished to claim, there is also an obligatory duty to trade off, I am well aware of that... but if my maid is not aware of that, it's my duty to make her sees that, right?
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.
.
.

I hope people can be more objective when they weight such issues.

[Linlin]

Harlequin:

I don't think is right to take an office employment as the absolute guideline for employment of domestic helper.


As an employer of both groups, I am definitely using different yardstick.

Simply put--

I do not have staff that think that they can knock at my door anytime for salary advancement. If they are in need of money, that's not a problem of mine.

I do not get my gate crashed for they personal loan or loan shark. For that matter, they can't use my home address as theirs, they do not have a chance to disrupt my life.

I would not be held responsible when my staff got herself pregnant from her EMA.

I do not have to answer to any authority if she thinks she can manage another job after office hours, unless the part time job is conflict of interest that might compromised my business.

I do not also, at anytime, put my young children under their charge.

I do not eat what my staff cooked, even she hates me, I will have no worry that my food be spiked.

I do not let them in charge of the security of my house, my belonging.

I do not house them, I do not subject to their emotional blackmail, I do not have to worry that they failed bi-yearly medical check up... even they are HIV positive we can still retain their service because we do not need to have close personal contact to interact.

I do not have the obligation to fly her home should she resigned.

In short, I do not have that much of the obligation for the average office staff.


.
.
.
.

Employer of a maid, is more to that... we are, their guardians... we have to ensure their safety and their well being, among other things...

Domestic helpers aren't our office staff. Period. Don't get yourself confused.

We cannot rely solely on them to auto assume their obligatory role to their employers, so, we exercise whatever influences we have on them, we guide, we fuss, we nag, we get ourselves upset and upset them...

For every right one wished to claim, there is also an obligatory duty to trade off, I am well aware of that... but if my maid is not aware of that, it's my duty to make her sees that, right?
.
.
.
.

I hope people can be more objective when they weight such issues.

Agree! Well said! :goodpost:

[piyobaby]

Harlequin:

I don't think is right to take an office employment as the absolute guideline for employment of domestic helper.


As an employer of both groups, I am definitely using different yardstick.

Simply put--

I do not have staff that think that they can knock at my door anytime for salary advancement. If they are in need of money, that's not a problem of mine.

I do not get my gate crashed for they personal loan or loan shark. For that matter, they can't use my home address as theirs, they do not have a chance to disrupt my life.

I would not be held responsible when my staff got herself pregnant from her EMA.

I do not have to answer to any authority if she thinks she can manage another job after office hours, unless the part time job is conflict of interest that might compromised my business.

I do not also, at anytime, put my young children under their charge.

I do not eat what my staff cooked, even she hates me, I will have no worry that my food be spiked.

I do not let them in charge of the security of my house, my belonging.

I do not house them, I do not subject to their emotional blackmail, I do not have to worry that they failed bi-yearly medical check up... even they are HIV positive we can still retain their service because we do not need to have close personal contact to interact.

I do not have the obligation to fly her home should she resigned.

In short, I do not have that much of the obligation for the average office staff.


.
.
.
.

Employer of a maid, is more to that... we are, their guardians... we have to ensure their safety and their well being, among other things...

Domestic helpers aren't our office staff. Period. Don't get yourself confused.

We cannot rely solely on them to auto assume their obligatory role to their employers, so, we exercise whatever influences we have on them, we guide, we fuss, we nag, we get ourselves upset and upset them...

For every right one wished to claim, there is also an obligatory duty to trade off, I am well aware of that... but if my maid is not aware of that, it's my duty to make her sees that, right?
.
.
.
.

I hope people can be more objective when they weight such issues.

Well said!! :rahrah:

[syen27]

Harlequin:

I don't think is right to take an office employment as the absolute guideline for employment of domestic helper.


As an employer of both groups, I am definitely using different yardstick.

Simply put--

I do not have staff that think that they can knock at my door anytime for salary advancement. If they are in need of money, that's not a problem of mine.

I do not get my gate crashed for they personal loan or loan shark. For that matter, they can't use my home address as theirs, they do not have a chance to disrupt my life.

I would not be held responsible when my staff got herself pregnant from her EMA.

I do not have to answer to any authority if she thinks she can manage another job after office hours, unless the part time job is conflict of interest that might compromised my business.

I do not also, at anytime, put my young children under their charge.

I do not eat what my staff cooked, even she hates me, I will have no worry that my food be spiked.

I do not let them in charge of the security of my house, my belonging.

I do not house them, I do not subject to their emotional blackmail, I do not have to worry that they failed bi-yearly medical check up... even they are HIV positive we can still retain their service because we do not need to have close personal contact to interact.

I do not have the obligation to fly her home should she resigned.

In short, I do not have that much of the obligation for the average office staff.


.
.
.
.

Employer of a maid, is more to that... we are, their guardians... we have to ensure their safety and their well being, among other things...

Domestic helpers aren't our office staff. Period. Don't get yourself confused.

We cannot rely solely on them to auto assume their obligatory role to their employers, so, we exercise whatever influences we have on them, we guide, we fuss, we nag, we get ourselves upset and upset them...

For every right one wished to claim, there is also an obligatory duty to trade off, I am well aware of that... but if my maid is not aware of that, it's my duty to make her sees that, right?
.
.
.
.

I hope people can be more objective when they weight such issues.

\"we guide, we fuss, we nag, we get ourselves upset and upset them...\" this is so true! I found myself with another child to worry about since I got my helper..