Do you compare your kid's marks with others?
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24by7mum:
Well, it is best not to compare as the child could be demoralised (if he/she is weak) or over confident (if he/she is smarter than the rest). The most important thing is to ask your child to try his or her best in everything they do! That should be enough. The focus should be on the effort and the process. Results are tricky as it depends on many variable uncontrollable factors. We all want our kids to be HAPPY at the end of the day, right?
quite right.
happy yes, but also must know what is hard work and effort
hard work can be happy time too -
In my dd class, the teacher makes it a point that who ever 听写/默写 scored less than 70 have to stay back another day to re test…
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verykiasu2010:
in my son's class they announce the top 5 scorers and the bottom marks (no name)[/quote]This sounds more reasonable - pat on the back for the top scorers and motivation for the others. I don't believe in shaming the bottom scorers. The effect can be disastrousRRMummy:
[quote=\"tamarind\"]In my girl's school, teachers displayed the marks of all students on the screen. There is no secret
Doesn't seem very nice for those who are at the bottom... :roll: -
verykiasu2010:
Yes doing your best would involve hard work and effort24by7mum:
Well, it is best not to compare as the child could be demoralised (if he/she is weak) or over confident (if he/she is smarter than the rest). The most important thing is to ask your child to try his or her best in everything they do! That should be enough. The focus should be on the effort and the process. Results are tricky as it depends on many variable uncontrollable factors. We all want our kids to be HAPPY at the end of the day, right?
quite right.
happy yes, but also must know what is hard work and effort
hard work can be happy time too
But if you focus less on the results but on the learning process, it will be a happy time!
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RRMummy:
This sounds more reasonable - pat on the back for the top scorers and motivation for the others. I don't believe in shaming the bottom scorers. The effect can be disastrous[/quote]I don't like it too. They only do it only at class level. If they do it across all the P1 classes, it will be even more demoralizing. I wonder why is it necessary for teachers to do so ? Too free ?
in my son's class they announce the top 5 scorers and the bottom marks (no name)verykiasu2010:
[quote=\"RRMummy\"]
Doesn't seem very nice for those who are at the bottom... :roll: -
1littlegal:
That's great :celebrate:
ME! when my DD get 80+ for her chinese. :oops: She never did well in her chinese until in Pri 1.tamarind:
My colleague, whose kids are in the same primary school as mine, tried hard to get me to tell her my girl's SA1 marks. I said I forgot. I did not ask her kids' marks at all, but she could not help it and told me.
Kids are only in P1 ! I do not believe that learning should be about competition. My girl's school only published the lowest and highest marks of all students for each subject, and I think that is good enough.
MOE has just announced that there will be no more exams in P1. I actually think that it is fine to have exams from P1 to P6. But they should disallow ranking in primary schools in all levels. The problem is not with exams, it is with the endless comparisons by parents.
My colleague said that her girl scored near the highest marks, but she is still not happy, because she said that \"many kids also scored near the highest marks\". This is not true because it is a neighbourhood school and the teacher told me that many kids still cannot read in P1. Even in a brand name school where more than half the kids can get near perfect scores, parents should still be happy for their kids.
Just curious. Are there any parents out there who actually say \"Well Done\" when your child gets 80+ marks ?
Parents should look at marks in \"absolute terms\" and not in \"relative terms\". 80+ marks is very good results if we don't compare with others. -
tamarind:
That's great :celebrate:
ME! when my DD get 80+ for her chinese. :oops: She never did well in her chinese until in Pri 1.1littlegal:
[quote=\"tamarind\"]My colleague, whose kids are in the same primary school as mine, tried hard to get me to tell her my girl's SA1 marks. I said I forgot. I did not ask her kids' marks at all, but she could not help it and told me.
Kids are only in P1 ! I do not believe that learning should be about competition. My girl's school only published the lowest and highest marks of all students for each subject, and I think that is good enough.
MOE has just announced that there will be no more exams in P1. I actually think that it is fine to have exams from P1 to P6. But they should disallow ranking in primary schools in all levels. The problem is not with exams, it is with the endless comparisons by parents.
My colleague said that her girl scored near the highest marks, but she is still not happy, because she said that \"many kids also scored near the highest marks\". This is not true because it is a neighbourhood school and the teacher told me that many kids still cannot read in P1. Even in a brand name school where more than half the kids can get near perfect scores, parents should still be happy for their kids.
Just curious. Are there any parents out there who actually say \"Well Done\" when your child gets 80+ marks ?
Parents should look at marks in \"absolute terms\" and not in \"relative terms\". 80+ marks is very good results if we don't compare with others.[/quote]parents should compare the results vertically(kis' performance in the past) instead of horizontally (with peers) -
HyperKiasu:
I agree !
parents should compare the results vertically(kis' performance in the past) instead of horizontally (with peers)tamarind:
That's great :celebrate:
Parents should look at marks in \"absolute terms\" and not in \"relative terms\". 80+ marks is very good results if we don't compare with others. -
tamarind:
At least for now, in order to gain my well done again, DD is putting in slightly more effort on her Chinese. Although she still doesn’t like it. Scoring 80+ in her class is considered low. Well, I must say I got to be contented.
I agree !HyperKiasu:
parents should compare the results vertically(kis' performance in the past) instead of horizontally (with peers) -
KSP:
I try not to but sometimes I do ask. I really feel is not so healthy but we are human. I mean what if my child score higher or lower it is only a test or exam. But I really feel annoyed if parents ask me about my child's score. Especially those ask for the sake of comparing. I just told them which band and said forgot the exact marks. After a few time they catch my hint.
I guess most of us have worked before. My first boss told me never ever compare pay amongst colleagues (maybe he has vested interested so saying so
). But after working fo so long, I can see the wisdom in his words.
To me, comparing results is like comparing pay. Even if kid has 2 marks more than neighbour, alarm bells may sound cos why only 2 marks. Neighbour not very diligent you know etc etc. If results worse than neighbour, then the feeling is even more frustrating.
So why create opportunity to make ourselves unhappy? But I do agree that it'll be useful to see where we stand in terms of highest score, median score.
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