In-law problems?
-
Angelight:
Thanks, Chen. :hugs: Venting it out here does help, to a certain extent. But when I'm offline and have to face that 'mountain' again, my heart sank to the lowest pit. :sad:
:hugs: Cheerio!
I rant quite a fair bit here too.. .. :frustrated:
But my situation now is much better compared to what some of our KSP mummies like you are going thru.. .. :nunchuk: -
We are giving allowance to MIL as she is taking care of our children althou she stay in the same roof with us and definitely more well off than us. But that is in order to shut her off telling others we asked her to take care of our kids for free.
I am also giving monthly allowance to my mum as she is nt working...
Auntie M,
I noe how u feel.... as my DH also the one who forked up $$ when his fam are going out. but since we are not doing it every forthnite so i just dun be bother.... (since its his own money)... -
After reading all DIL problems with MIL ,I knew that i was not alone in this world to face "weird" MIL. My MIL think was the worst of all, wanted to beat me with umbrella then. Hokkien believed that got beaten with umbrella is very "bad luck" thing. see she wanted me to be extremely "unlucky". My mum and sister said "wow" very very evil "MIL". My mum was angry then and called my FIL to question him and he dare not admit that his wife had behaved this irrationally. Not suprise to us, when he told my mum that i deserved it if it did happened!! My mum was shocked and wonder are they "human" ? after the incident, actually my mum had told me that if i wasnt happy with my marriage and if my hubby cant "protect" me ( coz he worked in his father business) , she wanted me to retink what i want in my life. She told me she wantd me to be happy and will support whatever decision i made. i was very moved then and cried for many many days then. I was glad that i still have my mum to understand and support what i had to sacrifice inorder for this marriage to stay intact. my mum said she was sad that her DD had been treated like a dirt in that family. My mum is a buddhist , She used to tell me to respect others and as long as it is a life. But she told me "dun need lah" for that family. I always tell my friends, that my ten years marriage is with lots of tears and scars but also with happiness. To survive this long in this marriage , my DH had played an impt role and my cute two year old baby. i remember a friend had told me , life is like present, sometimes you open the not so good first, but the good happy one will follow eventually.
-
Ningning, I can understand completely when you said your marriage is with "lots of tears and scars, but also happiness". Mine too.
Initially I did wonder if the happiness was worth all the tears and scars, and even wanted to give up. My MIL almost wrecked my marriage. But after I had DD, I would still choose DH if I had to start all over again. But now I would fight fiercely to protect my marriage and family. -
ningning,
It is really tough for you to be handling/living life like this everyday… …
Have you thought about your DD? She will grow up soon enough and will be able to understand what’s happening in the household, not to mention the ‘abuse’ part…
Sit down and have a chat with you hubby, is there any other way out?
Is the suffering necessary or worth it at all?
Juz my $0.02… … -
Angelight:
Hi Angelight,Ningning, I can understand completely when you said your marriage is with \"lots of tears and scars, but also happiness\". Mine too.
Initially I did wonder if the happiness was worth all the tears and scars, and even wanted to give up. My MIL almost wrecked my marriage. But after I had DD, I would still choose DH if I had to start all over again. But now I would fight fiercely to protect my marriage and family.
you are not alone this world that has a MIL tat wanted to wreck your marriage. ya, fully agreed we have to fight and think ways to protect our marriage and family. :rahrah: Yes ,at one point in my life , i wonder too \"is that worth it\" then my baby came. I am a buddhist, I believe that heaven had wanted me to know then that there is hope for this marriage, dun give up . Had i gave up that time, if this life i would only knew i had an unhappy failed marriage and given my character, i may not want another marriage coz i am too too tired liao. Me , these days i cut off all communications with them at my very best level. Life has been peaceful and sweet so far now with my DH and DD without them( my evil MIL n SIL and my henpeck FIL) in my life. But i feel sorry for my DD that she has very little contact with her mama and gonggong. But i also knew they dun miss her these much lah. But how can i raise my DD to be a happy healthy girl if i was to be so unhappy again with these evils ppl in my life again? so , no choice lor.......my girl..... -
Alamak, been following this thread too often liao. Talk about jinxing things.
Things have been relatively peaceful lately and last night, MIL had to call say she told her sis that we want a dining table set that the sis is getting rid of. DH ask her why would we want one, we have a perfectly good one oredi. She said to put our current dining set in the garden and put the one that her sis is getting rid of in our dining room. :siao:
DH tried to explain to her that we don't need another set of dining table and chairs and she kept saying but it is in gd condition and she oredi reserved it for us. After a few minutes, DH lost his patience and told her off, to stop collecting other people's unwanted stuff to put in our house. If she want it she can go and collect it herself and put in her house, not ours. This is not the first time that she did that. She did exactly the same thing when we were first married, it was a sofa set then, and DH at that time was more of a mummy's boy and did whatever she asked. That drove me nuts cos the items were not in good condition, does not blend with our decor and we have to spend money to get people to collect and eventually dispose.
And from there, it went from furnitures to how we do not appreciate her gestures and how she always have us in her heart but we keep rejecting her good intentions, dah dah dah. I :siam: the moment I saw DH losing his patience with her. I know bad of me. But his mother he handle, my mother I handle. -
Hi Ningning,
My mum also called my MIL once to ask her why she treated me that way and she aggressively said that "your daughter can’t be bulled easily" blah blah blah. Right after that, she called my DH and cried pitifully to say that my mum called to scold her. My DH believed her and we had a big argument. My mum was so upset about the accusation. -
Funz:
Alamak, been following this thread too often liao. Talk about jinxing things.
Things have been relatively peaceful lately and last night, MIL had to call say she told her sis that we want a dining table set that the sis is getting rid of. DH ask her why would we want one, we have a perfectly good one oredi. She said to put our current dining set in the garden and put the one that her sis is getting rid of in our dining room. :siao:
DH tried to explain to her that we don't need another set of dining table and chairs and she kept saying but it is in gd condition and she oredi reserved it for us. After a few minutes, DH lost his patience and told her off, to stop collecting other people's unwanted stuff to put in our house. If she want it she can go and collect it herself and put in her house, not ours. This is not the first time that she did that. She did exactly the same thing when we were first married, it was a sofa set then, and DH at that time was more of a mummy's boy and did whatever she asked. That drove me nuts cos the items were not in good condition, does not blend with our decor and we have to spend money to get people to collect and eventually dispose.
And from there, it went from furnitures to how we do not appreciate her gestures and how she always have us in her heart but we keep rejecting her good intentions, dah dah dah. I :siam: the moment I saw DH losing his patience with her. I know bad of me. But his mother he handle, my mother I handle.
Same here, my MIL like to take things, including foodstuff, from her siblings whether she needs it or not. Then she will try to pass to us. Luckily my DH always says no 'cos he knows I won't like it. -
Mamo:
Mine likes to take my things and give 'em away. In the past, she used to deploy my maid to her sister's house... and make off with empty plastic chests that I use to organize my closets... and she would volunteer my services to pick up relatives' children from playschool. In the process, she collected a lot of goodwill but it was my effort and my belongings. She would even make off with half loaves of bread...
Same here, my MIL like to take things, including foodstuff, from her siblings whether she needs it or not. Then she will try to pass to us. Luckily my DH always says no 'cos he knows I won't like it.
I can't believe that I just let her do that to me!! Now of course, she doesn't anymore.
Hello! It looks like you're interested in this conversation, but you don't have an account yet.
Getting fed up of having to scroll through the same posts each visit? When you register for an account, you'll always come back to exactly where you were before, and choose to be notified of new replies (either via email, or push notification). You'll also be able to save bookmarks and upvote posts to show your appreciation to other community members.
With your input, this post could be even better 💗
Register Login