In-law problems?

[verykiasumummy]

nightlone:

i came in here looking to su ku then found this thread.

My problem is not so much in law. it's the sisters, especially the eldest one.
My in-laws live with us. The house is under the father and my H's name.
The grandkids come over after preschool/school. The rest of the family comes for dinner, take their kids and then go home. Every weekday.
It all started when the eldest sis, R, put her daughter with stomach flu here in 2008, 2009 (can't remember). I didn't know what stomach flu was. I thought it's just stomachache.
Then my son got it. He was 2, 3yo then. At the doc's, i asked if it was infectious. the doc said yes, quite. So i become very TL already and complain to my H. I said that his sis was very inconsiderate. She jolly well knows it's contagious then she still bring over. But I still didn't say anything to her, only shot poisonous looks at her.
Ok, i'm the kind who needs sleep or I'll be very very short tempered.
As u may know, stomach flu involves fever, vomiting, etc. And if u've cared for small children with these symptoms, u know how it's like. After a few days like that, i blew my top. \"You know why he got the stomach flu?! because your dd got it and then spread to him! u know it's contagious u still bring her here!\" so on so forth.
She became not shuang lor. After shouting a while, she told me to move back to my mum's. I reminded her that she jia chu qu one.
After this, I laid down a lot of rules.
The thing that really irritates me is that she never thot she was in the wrong. She thinks that i'm unreasonable. And the incredible thing is, none of her sisters opened their houses to her when her kids are sick. All put here. She thinks that her leave is very precious. So our leave is not precious. can take leave all time. Mess up my home is ok. Mess up her home not ok :mad:
Another thing that super irritates me (altho not my business) is that her H can sit there read newspaper. His MIL or SIL have to help him bathe his 8 yo. Hey you already 40+, still need them to do this kind of thing for u. whose son is he? u say u are tired, but who is not tired? As long as u become a parent, it's tiring.
Aiyah dunno lah... there are so many things that adds up that I really buay tahan :frustrated:
they think that i led their son/brother astray, that he was such a sweet boy etc. I'm like please lor, look at your own behavior first.

i can relate very well with ur exp cos i also living with in-laws.. and i hv 4 sis-in-laws!!! all unmarried!! i go hm late late late because i really dun want to face n see them at all...

but very sad to say.. whatever we say to dh, they also just listen, they will not take actions.. they think we should be understanding towards them instead.. if u complaint too much, that becomes ur problem ur fault again...

what to do... i'm just waiting to leave the hse when my hse is here!!

[Pinky Piglet]

Hi verykiasumummy


This is what I felt too but I don’t give it a damn…

[verykiasumummy]

Pinky Piglet:

Hi verykiasumummy


This is what I felt too but I don't give it a damn...

we as DIL cannot say anything too... dun complain also xin ku... complain too much also our fault...

dun forget, mil have dd's too.. their dd's will also become others' dil... and the cycle goes... retribution goes... haha...

[nightlone]

I also used to not go home, sit in the nice quiet office until very late but then I realized it was affecting my son. Like that, I only see him in the morning and miss his bedtime. That’s why I quit lor, and went overseas.

[verykiasumummy]

nightlone:

I also used to not go home, sit in the nice quiet office until very late but then I realized it was affecting my son. Like that, I only see him in the morning and miss his bedtime. That's why I quit lor, and went overseas.

??? i hv many question marks... u mean u now overseas??

[nightlone]

After 2 years then have to come back. If no need to come back, I rather just stay there.

[janet88]

They are both busy smoking and drinking stout at home. Even used the money meant for utilities for these unhealthy vices. Telephone line was cut off bcos the old man used it to buy stout...called hubby several times last Friday during office hours for money.

Asked hubby why not go for GIRO. He said if using GIRO, they will use electricity, water and telephone like nobody's biz. :slapshead: Wah lau, how long is this going to continue :rant:

[Blessedwife]

Hi Janet,


Hmm what can I say… I really pity u for having such in laws. May I ask when u complaint to yr hubby about them what did he say? Did he also agree with you ?

Can you just ignore their requests or die die need to accede to them?

Ok for me my in laws are ok. Over the years I have come to know their pattern and I also act along with them. I do not show them faces non being rude to them because I am very thankful to my in-laws for bringing up a good son (my hubby) for me.

Without them, I won’t have such a good husband. With this in mind, I can tolerate them. Well, they are not difficult to please either.

My mil and sil always commented I have good taste with my dressing and they like almost everything I buy for them. Yes, I do buy many bags (LV and coach) and Crabtree lotions and perfume etc for my mil and she is most happy when she received them. As for my sil, I only buy dresses and bags and shoes for her cutie little daughter. All are very happy.

I know by doing all these I will make my hubby very happy.

Actually I just don’t like his family side to take advantage of him very often like whenever his family side got any lunch or dinner gatherings my hubby is the one to pay. Also, every year they will hold a big birthday celebrations for his grandma in big restaurant and he as a grandson also needs to pay for the whole banquet. I wonder why his dad and uncles aunties don’t pay? Imagine his household is so big and his grandma got so many sons and daughters but non pays for it.

Ok they may think that my hubby earns the most among the family but shouldnt all chip in to pay?

This is my only complaint against his family else all of them are quite good to me. Whenever my in laws come to pay us a visit, they will buy my fave coffee (3 in 1) and many tibbits for my son and also toilet paper and washing detergent for us coz my mil said its on sale so she buy for us.

[Pinky Piglet]

Hi blessedwife


Not everyone can afford to buy coach or LV bag for in laws ( no offence)
Maybe you are one of the lucky ones who do not has any issue with in laws

[Blessedwife]

Hi pinky piglet,


Yes I know I am not offended

Without my hubby, I won't be able to buy those branded too.
I can understand.

I am just a blessed wife

Hope all mummies here have a great weekends !!