No Problem is problem

[minnie2004]

buds:

At times, i see the laundry has been hung when i wake

up in the morning... or all the dishes are already washed
after i finish my dinner... and he does all the vacuuming +
mopping work. Both my girls also chip in. Well, lucky me..

So sweet, your hubby and girls :love:

[buds hubs]

buds:

I am fortunate that i do not have major issues
with petty housework cos hubs is a real doll
when it comes to housework. :love:

:oops: Geeez.. thanks baby!!

[buds]

Thanks minnie2004.. :hugs:


Well, i AM a known nite owl.
I usually hang the clothing wee hours of the morning and try to
finish up with chores when i have settled everyone into bed..
hubs included.

So, i tend to sleep in during the AM.. Hubs surprises me with an
extremely clean house when i wake up sometimes. Guess i slept
thru' all that vacuuming racket and what nots. :oops:

[jedamum]

hquek:

Very strange. if he does housework, he's helping ME....if I do housework, I'm definitely not doing him a favour...sometimes I really wonder why the disparity.

hquek,
something funny to share with you.

if i do housework, it is my duty.
if dh does housework, it is 4play.
:evil: :rotflmao:

[ZacK]

adhdadhd:

Hello Kong,
First, I want to let you know, you are not alone.
If you are a job holder, you are luckier than me and many \"self-employed\". I have been unable to get a job since being laid off in Sep 08. My friend, who is around my age (late 40) in the same Semicon industry, also jobless since May 08. We are master degree holders, over Qualified and rejected by taxi companies... they say, when times are back to good, he will give up driving....

If you can still buy favorite books, food for your kids, you are more luckier.

I fall into what you mentioned, married older ... at 37 .. so you are luckier again.

During morning jog, I often run into these special kids learning how to jog, methodologically guided by their teachers (salute to these teachers, they are so kind!).. and you are luckier than these kids' parents...

You are indeed a very lucky person, who still able to vent in this Forum, and get so many of us to response to your \"greives\"! Much much better than those who don't even have money to buy computers....

Take heart, live life and be contended with what you have.

I like your perspective in life... Sometimes it's good to adopt this mindset... Then a lot of our problems will actually not be problems.

Cheers :celebrate:

[Donkey Kong]

Do you all think certain kind of personalities, not suitable for marriage?

:?
Eg, those who are creative, artists, fashion designers, inventors, etc.

Their minds are constantly on the move..... :love:

[mocharita]

What do you think? Why don’t you give your first opinion since your mind is not constantly moving? I’'ll be delighted to read your opinion.

[daisyt]

A friend just passed away in an accident, at late 30s. A few days before she passed away, my family happened to meet her. At that time, dd was having some kind of \"problems\" and was feeling down. After we knew about her death news, dd was very very sad. Initially, I did not quite understand why she had such big reaction. After talking to dd, she made me realise one important lesson - While one is struggling on his so called \"big\" problems, people on the other side, only has a few days to live on. Our \"big\" problems suddenly turn to be so tiny.

[Gooby]

Funz:

hquek:

Very strange. if he does housework, he's helping ME....if I do housework, I'm definitely not doing him a favour...sometimes I really wonder why the disparity.

Haha. I like this part.

DH & I had this ironed out long time ago. At that time we were newly married, no maid, no kids. He still wanted to continue with this singleton lifestyle. Golf, mahjong, pubbing. After an arguement about his not putting in his share in maintaining the house, he had the gall to tell me ok, he cancel his golf session for that weekend to 'HELP' me with the housework. I got fedup cos after all the talking and arguing, he still thinks it is my responsibility and he is doing me a favour. I went on strike. Refused to wash any of his clothes. He woke up 1 morning and realised that he was out of underwear. :lol: Asked me what happened I told him oh I did not know that you want me to 'HELP' you wash your clothes. Ok. Saturday I cancel my gossip session and 'HELP' you with the laundry. That night itself he came home with at least 10 more pairs of new underwear. And from then on, he pitched in and will offer to do the laundry or vacuum the floor. After some time we decided to get a part time maid cos we are really do not fancy spending 1/2 the weekend catching up on household chores.

We also had such quarrels during earlier marriage days. He used to be unhappy when he sees me resting and watching TV side by side with him. He was not happy seeing me R&R and expect me to start cleaning this and that.

Eventually, I got very upset and told him that we share the household expenses equally and that I also work full time and bring back the money. Why is he complaining as I am equally as tired as he is? If he can come back and rest after a hard day's work, why can't I do the same? If he finds anything not pleasing to his eyes, just go do it. Don't need to wait for me. I am working and I need my rest too. For me, if I see any chores that I can't wait, I will do it willingly and won't expect DH to do it. He kept his mouth shut ever since.

Nowadays, my maid does all the chores since the birth of my 2nd boy. Many times I wonder to myself why it seems that most of the men behave like that (except Donkey Kong that is the rare species) after marriage. Could it be due to all the mother's fault in the upbringing? My own brother never helps in housework. My mum used to ask me and my older sister to do the housework. I have come across many guy friends that never does housework at home as their mother did not insist or request.

I believe that everyone should help out in a family. If not, at least not be the one that messes the house. I hate to see people leaving the cups or newspaper here and there after their drinks or reading. DH is still doing this now but I can't be bothered to lecture him anymore.

Now that I have 2 boys, I will make sure they help out in the housework to contribute as a family and not behave like a MCP.

[Han Seo]

My husband is the opposite. He does not like to do the housework and does not expect me to, either. When I do it and complain, he’d say, "But I didn’t ask you to clean, right?" So I’d say, "If you don’t clean and I don’t clean, the house will magically clean by itself?" Then he’d say, "But the house is so clean, clean what?" And I’d reply, "Do you know why it’s so clean? That’s because yours truly here have been cleaning it!" So if you don’t want to help, please just shut up!"


Housework was also a sore point earlier on in our marriage. Worse, I have to clean up after HIS mother as well (his mum is healthy, not senile or disabled, just plain untidy and lazy). Now, after 18 years of marriage, I’m used to it. I have a part-time cleaner to come and help with the cleaning and I make sure he also foots part of the cleaning bill. The bulk of the housework is still done by me but I guess this is the best way to reach a compromise.