No Problem is problem
-
daisyt:
Fully agree with this one, daisyt. I absolutely need my alone time regularly to preserve my sanity. Day to day routine is so busy & packed, we're always jumping from this task to the next mindlessly.
.......
Once, my child told me. Her teacher encouraged them once a while, to spare some time out, to do things they like, ALONE. Eg, walk in the park, jogging, read a book ... alone. I find this quite true and good, we have so many roles to play in life, ....
Work never ends....
-
daisyt:
Good morning Daisy,Hi dolphinsiah, just do whatever you can, we are not wonder women. If you are really struggling on housework, why don't get some part time helper? OR come out a duty roaster, get your children to help out some tasks. I think its fair, to talk to the children, that you need help. As for cooking, no need to cook everyday. Maybe 2 to 3 times a week.
Once, my child told me. Her teacher encouraged them once a while, to spare some time out, to do things they like, ALONE. Eg, walk in the park, jogging, read a book ... alone. I find this quite true and good, we have so many roles to play in life, especially after marriage. We are parents of our children, friends of our children, friends of our friends, colleagues of our colleagues, children of our parents etc. But hey, don't forget, I am, me, myself and I too.
Thanks for the encouragement....Yes I fully agreed in life we have so many hats to wear...
At home we are somebody mother, wife , daughter
At work we are somebody staffs...
But if I can turn back the clock...I will not make so many mistakes in life...
So I always tell my kids ....I do not want them to follow my marriage path...
Most important is they must learn to take care of themselves...get a good job...
Marry or not important...
Have kids or not not important...
Marriage and kids are very HUGE Responsibles!!!
Most important must know how to look after themselves.
The world is round ....there is so many things to entertain us...
What the most important is have $$$$!!! -
dolphinsiah:
Hey dolphinsiah,No women like to be a \"Mad Women\" at home....
Why we behave like that....
Is because the husbands are not providing us enough...
They expect the wives to bring in the bacon$$$
be the maid...be the tutor...be their cook...be their mum....
I also want to dress up to go shopping ...have high tea ...do manicure
come back just entertain my husband....
but can meh!!!
Unless my husband is a billonaire... :love:
Local mothers are very attached to their kids and very defensive about the families...
You think like those \"young grass\"...USE YOUR BRIAN
I feel so frustrated ....why I choose to marry ...such a heartless man...
He comes home sit in front of the TV....
Weekend is for his Golf and God...
you're not the only one. I have to be maid to 3 boys (not men) and to the house. DH can come home, turn on tv, turn on pc and be king. I will be the bumblebee rushing here to pack this, there to do that....he is off work earlier than me, but when I get home - kids homework not done ('becos DS dunwan to do' is a reason), kids comm book not checked. BUT, farmville harvesting is done, mafiawar is fought....wah lau eh....I also want to pengz.
I'm different from you - will tell DH off....and to his credit, he's been very much more on. at least he does try to chip in here and there. dunno how/why he wake up, but I'm thankful for every help given.
Very strange. if he does housework, he's helping ME....if I do housework, I'm definitely not doing him a favour...sometimes I really wonder why the disparity. -
It’s fun thinking about what if I had all the time to myself and remembering the days BEFORE I had kids, before I was married…but then, family and kids bring about a different type of joy and experience.
Honestly, being resentful is hardwork. I have since stopped nagging at DH for not helping out and will follow just do it. No point to poison our relationship further. And when I do housework, I take it as exercise and I am happy when the place is clean even if my standards are really low at this time. Most importantly, I’m slogging away for my kids. -
hquek:
Haha. I like this part.
Very strange. if he does housework, he's helping ME....if I do housework, I'm definitely not doing him a favour...sometimes I really wonder why the disparity.
DH & I had this ironed out long time ago. At that time we were newly married, no maid, no kids. He still wanted to continue with this singleton lifestyle. Golf, mahjong, pubbing. After an arguement about his not putting in his share in maintaining the house, he had the gall to tell me ok, he cancel his golf session for that weekend to 'HELP' me with the housework. I got fedup cos after all the talking and arguing, he still thinks it is my responsibility and he is doing me a favour. I went on strike. Refused to wash any of his clothes. He woke up 1 morning and realised that he was out of underwear. :lol: Asked me what happened I told him oh I did not know that you want me to 'HELP' you wash your clothes. Ok. Saturday I cancel my gossip session and 'HELP' you with the laundry. That night itself he came home with at least 10 more pairs of new underwear. And from then on, he pitched in and will offer to do the laundry or vacuum the floor. After some time we decided to get a part time maid cos we are really do not fancy spending 1/2 the weekend catching up on household chores. -
Funz:
He woke up 1 morning and realised that he was out of underwear. :lol:
You very good!!! I think we all have our little weapons...hee hee. -
cmm:
So don't hesitate and go ....
Fully agree with this one, daisyt. I absolutely need my alone time regularly to preserve my sanity. Day to day routine is so busy & packed, we're always jumping from this task to the next mindlessly.
Work never ends....
Walk in the park, look at people jogging with dogs, elderly have their walk, parents bring kids to school. Then try to think, what colour would be the next dog you would meet, imagine what would these elderly gossipping while exercising ...
I look at the sky and imagine I am actually up there, looking down. What would I see?
I would imagine, the hdb flats collapse, then I would plan my route of escape. Which way should I go, where should I run to?
Think of all these wuliao stuffs and free your mind from all other daily stuffs.
-
hquek:
Good one!!Funz:
He woke up 1 morning and realised that he was out of underwear. :lol:
You very good!!! I think we all have our little weapons...hee hee.
dolphinsiah, you can pick up a few tips there and there. haha
:celebrate: -
Good grief, Dolphinsiah and hquek. I am in the same boat as you guys.
I leave the house for work earlier than everybody else and come home every evening, still having to do the the laundry and ironing, plus the scrubbing of toilets, vacuuming and mopping the floor throughout the week. Dinner is settled by ordering tingkat (thank goodness!), otherwise I will pengsan. Still have to make sure ds does homework. Also have to decide when to clean aircon filter, change curtains, change bedsheets, do groceries. :faint: Sometimes, dh thinks he is living in a hotel. Sometimes I feel very fed-up. Talking some sense to dh only seem to work for a short while, before things go back to the way it was before. I seem to be the cash cow and work horse rolled into one. If I can turn the clock back, I will not take the same path again. The only thing that I am thankful for is ds. My hopes are on him and he is why I am still tolerating all this......... -
Funz:
Yeah... I did this to my spouse when we were newly wed ...many years ago....went on strike...ran away...threaten to divorce....
Haha. I like this part.hquek:
Very strange. if he does housework, he's helping ME....if I do housework, I'm definitely not doing him a favour...sometimes I really wonder why the disparity.
DH & I had this ironed out long time ago. At that time we were newly married, no maid, no kids. He still wanted to continue with this singleton lifestyle. Golf, mahjong, pubbing. After an arguement about his not putting in his share in maintaining the house, he had the gall to tell me ok, he cancel his golf session for that weekend to 'HELP' me with the housework. I got fedup cos after all the talking and arguing, he still thinks it is my responsibility and he is doing me a favour. I went on strike. Refused to wash any of his clothes. He woke up 1 morning and realised that he was out of underwear. :lol: Asked me what happened I told him oh I did not know that you want me to 'HELP' you wash your clothes. Ok. Saturday I cancel my gossip session and 'HELP' you with the laundry. That night itself he came home with at least 10 more pairs of new underwear. And from then on, he pitched in and will offer to do the laundry or vacuum the floor. After some time we decided to get a part time maid cos we are really do not fancy spending 1/2 the weekend catching up on household chores.
But you know Leopard never changes its spot....
Now I give up to \"talk sense \" to him as I do not have time to waste arguing with him....
He will said\" you are the one who do not want a maid not me...\"
I tolerate because of the kids....not throwing pots and pans at him :x
Once the kids grow up...I will show him my color again
Hello! It looks like you're interested in this conversation, but you don't have an account yet.
Getting fed up of having to scroll through the same posts each visit? When you register for an account, you'll always come back to exactly where you were before, and choose to be notified of new replies (either via email, or push notification). You'll also be able to save bookmarks and upvote posts to show your appreciation to other community members.
With your input, this post could be even better 💗
Register Login