Different religion

[Andaiz]

MLR:

The best lesson that I learned is never to take anything and I mean anything for granted. DH and I being 10 yrs as a couple, still tested by every turn of events in our life.


:celebrate:

Kudos to you MLR, for daily living out this challenge? I copped out by looking out for guys of the same faith coz I knew I can't grapple with issues like that :oops:

I'll let my friend know the points you've raised. Hard to try and convince someone in love :stupid: , but some time, somewhere down the road, reality has to take over lah!

[nkthen]

It’s very difficult to manage religions with relationships. Imagine that if you are a Buddhist and your spouse is a Christian.


Your spouse will find it uncomfortable to go to temple Vesak Day while you may find it uncomfortable going for Good Friday Church service.

The more difficult part is when the PARENTS are more devoted then the children. That’s where they may pressure the kids to convert their other partner.

[peapot]

MLR, I m in the same situation as you!!! I m buddhist but my hubby is also anglican. I also accept it rather than deal with it. Hubby only go church during christmas. Our kid?? Follow me loh… You know how my house look like? A christmas tree just next to a Buddha painting!! Don’t know what to say.


Actually I go to church with him but I don’t pray, just sing that’s all. He goes to temple with me but he don’t pray. That’s how we live our life. Very odd right?

[GreenQ]

peapot:

... I m buddhist but my hubby is also anglican. I also accept it rather than deal with it. Hubby only go church during christmas. Our kid?? Follow me loh.... You know how my house look like? A christmas tree just next to a Buddha painting!! Don't know what to say.


Actually I go to church with him but I don't pray, just sing that's all. He goes to temple with me but he don't pray. That's how we live our life. Very odd right?

I think we still can accept different religion for a couple. But it is quite difficult for older generation or parent in laws. My gd friend(christian) who has diff religion fr her DH(buddhist) always stress as she stays with her in-laws. Need to compromise most of the time. More in-law problems.

[dolphinsiah]

MLR:

Hiya pinky


Me Buddhist, DH Anglican.

Interestingly, DH didn't went church for like 15 yrs(since college). When we got married and he was out of job the same month, he hit the lowest point of his life. He was very fustrated, cos couldn't find a suitable job. At that time, I told him that sometimes you need more than love ones to support you, I think you need spiritual guidance and encouraged him to go back to church.

He told me that he hasn't been to church for the past 15 yrs and wondered if the church would collasped when he step in. Told him that his God would forgive him if he sincerely pray to him and asked for guidance. He did started going to church and after a few months things got better, found a job, we settled into marriage life.

2 yrs ago, we decide to baptise DS, guess what? The church didn't agree to our choice of godparents, cos they and me are not members of the church, The priest asked DH to ask for forgiveness and repent cos he married a non-believer. Well, what I said was that if the church couldn't accept me, so be it. I was pretty crossed, cos I was the one who got DH going back to his faith and yet the church is against me. I then started DS to go for church service with DH. And after 2 yrs later, just b4 DS 2nd birthday, he was baptised. He started going for Sunday classes and Sunday is my offday.

To me its about acceptance. You hv to accept him and his religion, when you married him, you marry his everything.

So I don't 'DEAL\" with it, I accept it. Furthermore, when you first went \"steady\" with him, isn't religion an important factor of consideration when you accept his proposal/marriage?

Just my personal experience and views.....

I am a buddist too ....did not have religion differences during dating as spouse was a free thinker then ...
But recently spouse decide that he wants to be Christian....

I am suprise that for a Christian to marry a non-believer is a 'Sin'...
Why eh??? :?:

Anyway lately, I have uncomfortable thoughts of both of us sharing different religion....
If during dating we do not share the same religion I would not have marry him... :heartbroken:

Maybe I worry too much.... :?
You know like thinking next time passed away...how to handle the funeral...Buddhist or Christian....a bit of insane ..... :scratchhead:

[MMM]

Actually, I feel that it depends on how staunch one is in their religion.


My auntie (staunch christian), uncle (staunch taoist).... You can imagine.. But after 20 years of marriage, think she stopped going to church but she does not go to temple. Uncle still staunch but probably not as much. He tends to keep his temple going low profile :? So the wife is like a tyrant and restrict much of his activities.

Another couple I met this year. My colleague. His wife is a staunch christian and he... I think he is a free thinker. They are in the US. When I was there this year, they drove me to the outlet. The wife commented that \"I saved him\" as he is very happy to do that than to follow her to church. Then at the end of our outing, she told me that she feels that she believe that her hubby should go to church with her as he is the head of family. She said this infront of her hubby who is my colleague.... He is a Director level and it just left me feeling wierd after that.

When I was studying in convent school, I went to church,etc... and ever thought of baptising. But mum always say... no matter what you do, do it after you get married. It's a wise advice. So both my hubby and I are free thinkers despite that he went through the saints school route for 10 years of his life. But mil is a staunch buddhist. Recently sil who is a christian and hubby a taoist is trying to get the entire family to go to her church :roll: I've reach a stage in life that I know my preference and belief and I hate people to preach to me.

[MMM]

Oh yes... have a auntie whose kids have all converted to christianity.


She converted recently. Her rationale to her sibling was christian are richer :roll: Then at the same time, she is in a confusion whether to still continue to pray to my grandma in the temple.

She is probably worried about what happens after she dies???? None of her 4 kids will hold the joss stick?

[dolphinsiah]

MMM:

Actually, I feel that it depends on how staunch one is in their religion.


My auntie (staunch christian), uncle (staunch taoist).... You can imagine.. But after 20 years of marriage, think she stopped going to church but she does not go to temple. Uncle still staunch but probably not as much. He tends to keep his temple going low profile :? So the wife is like a tyrant and restrict much of his activities.

Another couple I met this year. My colleague. His wife is a staunch christian and he... I think he is a free thinker. They are in the US. When I was there this year, they drove me to the outlet. The wife commented that \"I saved him\" as he is very happy to do that than to follow her to church. Then at the end of our outing, she told me that she feels that she believe that her hubby should go to church with her as he is the head of family. She said this infront of her hubby who is my colleague.... He is a Director level and it just left me feeling wierd after that.

When I was studying in convent school, I went to church,etc... and ever thought of baptising. But mum always say... no matter what you do, do it after you get married. It's a wise advice. So both my hubby and I are free thinkers despite that he went through the saints school route for 10 years of his life. But mil is a staunch buddhist. Recently sil who is a christian and hubby a taoist is trying to get the entire family to go to her church :roll: I've reach a stage in life that I know my preference and belief and I hate people to preach to me.

Fully agree I hate people preaching to me too ...
But sometimes it feels very strange ....you know when the whole group of Christians prays in from of you during family gatherings... :siam:

[daisyt]

MMM:

Oh yes... have a auntie whose kids have all converted to christianity.


She converted recently. Her rationale to her sibling was christian are richer :roll: Then at the same time, she is in a confusion whether to still continue to pray to my grandma in the temple.

She is probably worried about what happens after she dies???? None of her 4 kids will hold the joss stick?

A friend from North Germany, she is a Christian but what type, I cannot remember. She came to Singapore for sight seeing, went into temple, hold joss sticks too to pray. To her, its just another kind of praying, for the blessing of her family. I was surprised because I have friends, who are Christians, won't hold joss sticks in parent's funeral. So I asked this Germany friend about holding joss sticks and going into temple. She told me, all religions are good, as long as they don't do harm to others. And its a wrong teaching that Christians should not hold joss sticks, should not enter temple. The basic respect to others should be there, regardless what religion.

I am just quoting what she told me. I don't know much about bible or Christians. Maybe Christians here can enlighten us, for the sake of sharing.

[MMM]

I would like to share this.


In my company’s China operations, the ex-GM is very superstitious type. So every year during CNY, on certain date, everyone must go back to the office for the pian bao ceremony and also pray to god of prosperity. This went on for many years and everything is good for the China operations.

Then last year, they had a new GM. She is a christian. During the annual ceremony (note the ex-GM has been promoted and is now more senior), the current GM didn’t want to hold the joss stick as it was against the religion. During last year, the China ops was plagued by alot of issues. So everyone is like… must be the GM never pray.

So this year, they were wondering if she would do so. I haven’t hear the latest news. Will ask my boss.

My boss shared this with us during a dinner. There were catholics at the table and they were like. They will probably hold the joss stick. It’s out of respect for the practise/ religion rather than their belief. They feel that there is no harm doing so.