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    No Problem is problem

    Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Relationships
    240 Posts 62 Posters 77.7k Views 1 Watching
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    • T Offline
      toddles
      last edited by

      Maybe find a relative that your wife listens to? like does she have an older sister? or close cousin? or aunty?


      That person can help mediate, and maybe if she hears your perspective (your sadness at how things are now) from someone else that she knows well, then she might look into adjusting her behaviour too.

      Relationships are tough cos it takes two hands to clap, but don’t give up too easily.

      there are other worse relationships out there compared to yours that are even harder to salvage.

      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
      • E Offline
        EstherTan
        last edited by

        Donkey Kong:
        Think women will support women. 😢


        In any marital problem, everyone will blame the man.... :love: why?

        Women can be aggresive. :!: ruthless too. :?:

        Scary. :shock:
        If you read through the other threads, you will realize that most of KSP forum readers do not take sides just based on gender. Most of us give comments and encouragement based on what is related, and despite everything, encouragement to communicate and understand is always given.

        There are many in this forum who are male, and they read this forum on a daily basis, it is just whether they bother to reply to your thread.

        With any relationship, the result is a consequence of participation (or lack of) from all parties, the adults. From what you have been posting/ venting on this forum and how you feel about your wife and kids, perhaps divorce would be the best option for you instead of justification to having yourself 'tender grass'. No point in putting yourself through so much 'torture' since you feel so strongly about things at this point of time.

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        • D Offline
          Donkey Kong
          last edited by

          buds:
          Donkey Kong:

          Hard to comprehend women.:stupid:


          You have a sad sad life.. Your nick \"donkey\" is showing through very
          clearly how you are so pinned down on a daily basis... what a little
          man you are.. hee hawing your life away.. just like that.. ranting abt
          everything under the sun when YOU were responsible for the path that
          YOU chose.. the wife you chose.. the son you had a share in making &
          raising.

          Discipline.. Family appreciation.. Good family values and habits all start
          from a new beginning of a new relationship which has now passed by you
          the last 11yrs which you now claim YOU have no recollection of?

          Mebbe YOU have dementia and not your wife.

          And \"kong\" is supposedly the alter ego you wish you had in real life?
          Big, strong, respected... uhmmm... plainly put.. more MAN?

          For once in your life, stand up for yourself and the things you believe in.
          Find & correct the situations that are not going right for the last decade!
          MAN UP oredi, donkey kong! More trouble shooting and solving less complaining!

          Dear all,

          Donkey Kong was the name of the computer game during Apple IIe or IBM XT times lah. :lol: The gorilla will throw barrels down. Player has to avoid them. :celebrate:

          1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
          • W Offline
            Way2GO
            last edited by

            Funny ah, Donkey Kong

            I was going to invite u for a drink oredi.

            1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
            • D Offline
              Donkey Kong
              last edited by

              ningy:
              Donkey Kong, hope this site provides a place for u to vent all ur anger, compliants and fantasies so that u will not take any action in grazing on the new grass. i think u are very smart and practical to know that those pretty younger ladies are only interested in ur $$$ and even if u can find a mistress who professed to love u very much, u probably will still feel insecure and imagine the stress, time, energy and $$ needed to upkeep 2 households. what if ur wife and son found out the affair and demanded a divorce ?? pls think very carefully b4 taking any action.

              What if the wife gives the man permission to look for other woman? :lol: I got a ex-colleague, she doesn't mind her husband having No.2, 3, etc. as long as he loves her. Don't you think she is great?

              1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
              • W Offline
                Way2GO
                last edited by

                Donkey Kong:
                What if the wife gives the man permission to look for other woman? :lol: I got a ex-colleague, she doesn't mind her husband having No.2, 3, etc. as long as he loves her. Don't you think she is great?

                Looks like a topic men talk about over drinks leh
                u on anot? :lol:

                1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                • D Offline
                  daisyt
                  last edited by

                  Donkey Kong:

                  What if the wife gives the man permission to look for other woman? :lol: I got a ex-colleague, she doesn't mind her husband having No.2, 3, etc. as long as he loves her. Don't you think she is great?
                  I wonder how they tell their children if they find out now or later. Your 2nd, 3rd, 4th mum? And what kind of morale are we indirectly telling the children? 😐

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                  • N Offline
                    ningy
                    last edited by

                    Sometimes, the fun is in the fantasy stage ie. thinking of how nice if… when it becomes a reality, after a while it may not be so fun after all ie. if the girl friend or mistress starts to ask for more allowance/ gifts, more time, and the novelty wears off and then suddenly she becomes more and more like ur wife ! moreover, what if u want to "get rid" of the other woman and she comes to ur house, office and creates havoc (remember the news of a mistress/ girl friend pouring acid on the wife or the man killing and chopping his china girl friend) ?? have u seen an old movie - the bridges of maddison county ? may be u’re in the same shoes as the bored housewife in the movie; even if u’re given a second chance, in the end u may still choose back the same life.


                    life may be boring (u’re blessed compared to those diagnosed with terminal illness or going bankrupt) , may be u need to find some close friends (male) to offload ur complaints, talk nonsense, watch soccer, have a laugh and continue to be a good and responsible man.

                    1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                    • JenniferJ Offline
                      Jennifer
                      last edited by

                      Have you tried talking to your children why mother is always angry, yelling or scolding them?


                      Before I was married, I heard that a marriage is completed when the loving couple produces a baby. For those marriage that ended on a sad note, esp when there was no children, pple would say a child might hv salvaged the marriage.

                      After years of mediating disputes, big or small, between my two children (13 y.o and 8 y.o) almost daily, I wish I had not married or had married but did not hv children. Maybe it’s just me. I think having children can do damage to a marriage. Maybe that’s why many modern couples now choose not to have children.

                      Trust me on this one, it is definitely not healthy to be on a bad mood everyday. DH can comment why I always black faced when he comes home from work. Those who work are taught to leave whatever unhappiness in office outside the home’s doorstep. What about stay at home mothers? Whose doorstep can they leave their unhappiness? It just get built inside the system day in day out. And finally it erupted into feeling nothing for the family, just staying together for the sake of staying together, becos there is still a sense of responsibility towards the husband and the young children. That’s why we see middle aged divorces when the children in the marriage grow up and become independent.

                      Of course I hope my marriage would not end on this sad note becos I still love my husband. I am so desperate to minimise the conflicts between my children that I sought out the help of fengshui, give them fish oil supplements that proclaim to help in mood controls, take away violence theme PC games, etc.

                      1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0
                      • D Offline
                        Donkey Kong
                        last edited by

                        daisyt:
                        Donkey Kong:


                        What if the wife gives the man permission to look for other woman? :lol: I got a ex-colleague, she doesn't mind her husband having No.2, 3, etc. as long as he loves her. Don't you think she is great?

                        I wonder how they tell their children if they find out now or later. Your 2nd, 3rd, 4th mum? And what kind of morale are we indirectly telling the children? 😐

                        Aren't she great? She makes cup of tea/coffee for her husband everyday when she reaches home. No.2, 3, 4 are lawful in Singapore for her family.

                        1 Reply Last reply Reply Quote 0

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